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Are you born gay or is it society which makes a person gay?

38 Answers
Last Updated: 06/07/2021 at 6:07pm
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Jessica McDaniel, LPC, LCPC

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I have been practicing cognitive behavioral psychotherapy since 2007 with a diverse group of adult clients with various diagnoses, all races, and socioeconomic classes.

Top Rated Answers
roy13
January 25th, 2015 3:30pm
A gay person is born gay(lesbian) as a straight is born straight. Society can't make a person gay. Loving someone comes from inside.
Freewillsky
December 7th, 2015 2:05am
Does it matter? When we become more concerned with "what makes a person gay" rather than the fact that gay people deserve safety, respect and the opportunity for healthy relationships, we're missing the point. I am gay, have no idea why, and don't care. I feel fortunate to live the life I do and am lucky enough to live in a supportive society. I wish that every person -- regardless of sexual orientation -- lived in a society that supported their love and relationship.
ClaireSkies
August 14th, 2015 11:35am
I believe that people are born gay. Being gay is not a choice. You cannot force a straight person to be gay, and vice versa.
Itsacrazylifewelive
June 30th, 2015 6:35pm
I believe that people are born gay and that society impacts the individual in a way that their homosexuality comes out.
Aayla
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
July 8th, 2019 9:07pm
Sexual orientations are innate, they are born with us. Society cannot change anyone's identity, because sexual orientations are natural parts of us, not social constructs. It may look like homosexuality is something that people "develop" because not everyone realizes very soon that they are gay. But it's not because something changed in their sexuality. Simply, social conventions lead people to believe that heterosexuality is the norm, and so they might need more time to find out what their sexuality really is. But it's nothing something new, simply something that has always been there and is finally uncovered.
palywaly77
May 23rd, 2015 3:35am
I think its a persons way of feeling toesrds the same or opposite sex. That then gives you the idea of what you're into. A person isn't born gay and society doesnt make a person gay. Its a choice a person makes.
Anonymous
July 6th, 2015 12:07pm
you cannot make anyone BE gay just either are or arent...if its born with you? well thats a matter of perspective and what u believe. but since u cannot outrun being gay u can say u r born gay cause its omething u cant change no matter how hard u try, its part of you
Rainbows94
May 8th, 2015 9:40am
Many researchers have found that being gay is not determined by how you were raised but is mostly biological. A majority of identical twins identify with the same sexuality, yet there others who do not. These researchers suggest that factors during pregnancy might affect but being gay is still determined before birth.
sweetgrandpa
December 10th, 2019 5:17pm
I think first of all it is important to understand how much it matters to each other, if it is okay for her to be gay to herself, that is not the basis of her personal characteristics. Character, honesty, kindness, etc. These are much more important characteristics of a person than their choice at the time of sex. Maybe a healthy person has sex 2-3 hours a week, so much less than the time we spend working, studying and taking care of other subjects that makes me question the relevance. However, in order not to escape the subject, we may be born heterosexual, since our most primitive principle is biological, then comes the culture that makes us "experiment" with other sources of pleasure, and eventually one chooses to live this or another form of life. relationship that provides such pleasure.
Anonymous
October 11th, 2016 2:19am
I know for a fact that you can't "choose" to be gay, or "choose" to be straight. Trust me, I've tried to be straight. Doesn't work. You are born with it in your genes, and in your genes is your sexual preference. Many scientists believe that if you are a male and are gay, you most likely inhibited the "gay gene" from your mother, and girls, their fathers. There are many sites to help with this, Just Google the question and behold, the internet :)
Anonymous
October 10th, 2016 1:34am
You aren't gay but you choose to be gay society has no affect on making someone gay if it did I would be gay right now
PaleRose12
July 11th, 2016 5:51pm
No one makes you gay its a sexual preferences so in a way you are born with it you just know you like boys or girls or both!
Reddy
February 8th, 2016 11:47am
You are born gay, straight, bisexual and Transgender. Its as natural as your eyes are blue or your hair is brown.
avvvvvhotpotatojkimnothot
May 17th, 2016 4:09pm
You are definitely born gay. Society does not have the ability to make someone gay. If you're gay then you're gay.
sarahsunflower
March 25th, 2016 10:09pm
Society cannot influence someone to the point of questioning their attraction. You are born straight, You are born Gay, Etc.
Greatlistener87
March 22nd, 2016 6:49am
There are both types. Some know they are different from a young age and some find out after going through certain amount of things in society.
Anonymous
March 22nd, 2016 1:14am
There is scientific evidence that a person is born gay, just as a straight person is born straight. In a society where heterosexual people are the "norm", it wouldn't necessarily make sense that society is making people gay. If anything, society tends to push heteronormative ideals.
musicalForest17
February 8th, 2016 7:11pm
Personally, I believe that people are born gay. Despite what I thought throughout middle school, I didn't like boys. I remember in elementary school being attracted to girls. But that's just based on my experience.
hereToListen29
January 24th, 2015 9:53pm
Personally, as a gay person, I believe that most gay people are born this way and cannot help their hormonal feelings.
Ajdaubner
November 2nd, 2015 2:39am
I think people are born gay. Nothing can make a person gay or straight or transgender or anything that they aren't. People may "try on" new identities and sexualities to see if it fits them, or they may try to hide the fact that they are gay, but I think people are born with their gender identity and sexuality.
amazingHeart17
October 8th, 2015 3:03pm
I believe that someone who is gay is born gay, lgbtq members have been around since the beginning of time, they were just more secretive. Society may affect how comfortable you are about being gay, however you cannot control your sexual orientation.
Origamidragons
October 3rd, 2015 12:24am
I believe that people are born gay or straight. Society and upbringing have very little, if anything, to do with these traits. However, your society and upbringing can effect if and when you come out.
Waterbear
August 3rd, 2015 1:11am
The answer is that sexual orientation is complicated and its origins appear to be influenced by a number of different factors, including prenatal factors. Some people's sexuality is fluid and some is rigid and unchanging. Twin studies show that identical twins are more likely than fraternal twins to have the same sexual orientation, but often have different sexual orientations. The only thing that seems clear so far is that you can't consciously choose your orientation.
Chaliercy
July 7th, 2015 12:46pm
The society changes your opinion, not yourr sexuality. That's why there are people who are dissatisfied with their sexuality, because the opinion of society. You are born with a certain sexuality, and although your curiosity may allow new experiences, you are yourself. Be proud of yourself.
theoceansblue
June 22nd, 2015 9:38pm
People are born gay. There's nothing society can do to make a person become gay/stop being gay. There's nothing wrong with being gay, and the LQBT community should feel accepted by society.
Anonymous
June 7th, 2015 1:11am
Nature Vs. Nurture argument? I would say both genetics and social environment play a role to shaping a gay individual.
OliverC
May 27th, 2015 5:55pm
I don't think it's either. Sexuality can be very fluid--you may find for many years of your life that you're absolutely straight, but then there's this one person who comes along, and they're an exception. You may find that if you're bisexual with a preference towards women, if you fall in love with a man, you now usually prefer men (since they remind you of your partner). I don't believe that the "born [sexuality]" "born [gender]" model can encompass the depth and complexity of our human potential for love, growth, and self-discovery. Similarly, it can't be "society" that "makes" someone gay because different societies throughout the millennia have supported different genders and customs of attraction. A society with three accepted genders, for example, doesn't fit a model where someone can be "gay" or "straight." It just doesn't make sense. I'd wonder if society doesn't in fact "make" more people straight than otherwise, since many complex animal species (giraffes, dolphins, birds, etc) frequently engage in gay sex, sometimes even more so than procreative sex. These animals don't have a gender preference, just as they don't have a complex society. Food for thought.
Wishfulthinking44
January 19th, 2016 3:31am
You are born as you. If you are gay that is who you are and you don't have to defend it or explain it. It's no one else business but your own.
mysteriousWillow50
April 10th, 2015 7:02pm
Contrary to belief, one does not "choose" to be gay or lesbian or straight or any other part of the spectrum. We're 'born that way'-- which there's nothing wrong with being one sexual orientation or another, it's just a matter of being who we are and accepting and caring about one another.
Anonymous
May 10th, 2015 2:52am
its simply what you prefer. some people enjoy the opposit sex and other want the same. so id say youd be semi bron with it. because many young kids knew the fact that something was different about them