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How can I tell what gender I prefer?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 08/25/2020 at 9:58am
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Top Rated Answers
JumpyGoiaba
July 27th, 2018 7:15pm
That realization is a process that happens naturally, but you can try and ask yourself the following questions: - Throughout my life, have I felt attracted to males, females or another gender more often? - When I picture my future, what gender would I be happiest sharing a life with? - Which gender do I feel more comfortable around? - Which gender makes me feel a more intense emotional connection? These questions can help you understand your sexual orientation better, but they don't necessarily dictate it. You might realize you're equally attracted to both/all genders, or you might find you have a preference. Don't be afraid to experiment and always respect your identity. Best wishes for you :)
peacefulWinter54
March 11th, 2015 1:16pm
I believe you can tell what gender prefer by how comfortable you feel with that gender. Do you feel nervous around men? Do you feel more yourself when you are with a woman? Does a man make you feel secure?
Anonymous
April 2nd, 2015 6:54pm
Why is there a need to define yourself, or limit you attraction? You are who you are, and you are that way for a reason! Just go through life, liking who you like, and loving who you love regardless of the barriers of society. That will lead to happiness!
Aayla
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
August 26th, 2019 7:17pm
You can try to imagine yourself with different people of different genders and see how that makes you feel. You can analyze your emotional and physical responses to fantasies, that will help you determining if you attracted to one specific gender or maybe more. Remember to focus on how you feel and not think of what other people would say. It's all about you!
Freewillsky
December 7th, 2015 2:14am
Everyone's process is different. Not everyone's gender preference is forever, either. Some people have a steady sexual orientation that lasts a lifetime. Others are more fluid, with changes over time. Still others react specifically to specific people. If you're curious about who you prefer, stay curious, and see what happens and who you react to. You'll find your answer.
Anonymous
March 21st, 2017 4:11pm
It may be tricky at first to figure out which gender you prefer, but you are not alone. Remember only you can decide which gender you like and any decision is perfectly okay. You are perfectly normal if you tend to like boys, girls, neither, both, or any genders.
StefanBDK
August 25th, 2020 9:58am
I am gay and have always felt different. The older I got the clearer it became. What gender you prefer is about how you feel when you look at someone. With some you may find an admiration/attraction that is stronger than with others. Maybe it's men, maybe women or maybe just people in general. I always say that sexuality is fluent. Go for what you feel like going for and then maybe later you will feel like labelling it. Maybe you won't and that's okay too. All that matters, in my opinion, is that you are comfortable with wherever your interests takes you.
Anthony563
January 12th, 2015 6:43am
What I learned is best is researching all the possibilities and when you do, find out which on you relate to/you seem more like.
Anonymous
July 3rd, 2018 2:52pm
You are the expert on you! It's what you feel in your heart and soul- and if you find that you like them both, then there are other labels- such as gender fluid.
Anonymous
June 21st, 2016 9:17pm
If you mean the gender you would want for your partner: Then the easy answer is, unless you see yourself only being happy with one or the other, it doesn't matter and what's important is finding someone who makes you happy :)
Iauren
April 19th, 2016 3:08pm
It is based on your own personal preference. Understanding your sexual orientation can be rather confusing due to society discriminating against those who are different. Be yourself and choose what you like.
Anonymous
September 12th, 2016 7:29am
Ask yourself this; Do you feel like a female? Or a male? Perhaps none? It might take some time to figure out. Good luck :)
BeyondEmpathy
September 27th, 2016 9:31pm
Gender I feel is a hugely personal issue that only you can know or find the answer, Although it is also important to feel that your not facing these issues alone! Is there someone that you feel that you can trust to share this with or have you thought about gaining some support from a counsellor with this issue?
Greatlistener87
April 25th, 2016 1:49am
You have to identify which gender causes you to have more of an attraction factor to. Take your time on this as this is not an easy process and a process that you should not rush into.
gracefulSunshine62
November 27th, 2015 7:36pm
You can tell my reflecting inside yourself and asking yourself who you are and who you like. You may not prefer a gender though. Some people like all genders or some genders. Those are valid orientations :)
warmSoul94
April 25th, 2015 6:30am
Be honest with yourself. When you look at a girl, kiss a girl do you have feelings for them? When you look at a guy, kiss a guy do you have feelings for them? You can tell yourself what you want to hear but I promise your heart won't lie to you
adoredIcicle46
August 1st, 2016 1:57am
If you find a gender you enjoy and want to be than you can be that gender. If you dont find a gender you enjoy and like your own the most then you can be your gender.
BBoi
July 11th, 2017 8:00pm
Experiment with it. See which you like more. Maybe you aren't tied down to one favorite. One gender may do something you like more than another
Sewyn
June 11th, 2015 2:49am
You don't have to be afraid, you can tell it when you meet a new person or just correct someone that doesn't use the correct pronoum !