Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

How can you handle when friends aren't accepting of you being LGBTQ?

19 Answers
Last Updated: 08/05/2019 at 2:12am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Alex DS Ellis, MA, LMFT

Marriage & Family Therapist

Feeling depressed or anxious can be so overwhelming. I want to help you feel better and be able to enjoy life. You are not alone and you deserve emotional support.

Top Rated Answers
positiveWhisper24
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
March 15th, 2015 9:40pm
Find new friends. Seriously. Find new friends. Go online, go to the next town over. People who don't accept you for who you are, are probably not worth your time and energy.
fairybunny
April 16th, 2015 3:11am
If they can't accept it, then they aren't true friends. Surround yourself with compassionate, understanding people. Distance yourself from the worms in your apple.
Aayla
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
August 5th, 2019 2:12am
You can try to discuss it with them, explain open-heartedly how you feel and what it means to be who you are, offer to answer any question they may have and clarify any doubt or perplexity. If you make an effort to open your heart to them and they still reject you, you might want to ask yourself if you can really call a friend a person that does not accept who you are and doesn't make an effort to open their mind and understand you.
Ali
November 9th, 2015 3:16am
Personally, this is a simple one for me: they aren't your friends. You can try to educate them, usually being more aware of a topic will make you more accepting of it but that is no guarantee. At the end of the day, you should be around people who support you and make you happy, you have to consider that before calling someone your friend.
Allen39
May 4th, 2015 7:19am
Well, that depends. Are they willing to accept you? Sometimes, friends may just not understand the differences between you. Explaining it to them calmly can help. If they still don't understand and are flat-out unwilling to be friends with you, that's okay. It's not your fault some people are allergic to fabulous.
Anonymous
December 7th, 2015 4:50pm
If your friends wint accept you being LGBTQ+ polietly say "that is your opinion" and leave it at that.
eternalPassion14
January 19th, 2016 1:17am
"Those who mind don't matter and those who matter don't mind" if they don't accept you or don't eventually accept you then they aren't truly your friends. you should drop them and find a group that with love you
Anonymous
October 25th, 2016 1:32am
They aren't friends of you if they don't accept and respect your choices. Try to talk to them, make them understand how that makes you feel.
TryingmybestElsa
April 17th, 2018 3:29pm
That must be really difficult for you. I guess that you should give them some time. If they really care about you they will come around. People are homophobic because they don't understand that we're more than our sexual orientation. That we're all distinct individuals and that being queer is not just about sleeping with certain genders and not others. They'll end up realizing that because of you and that's a beautiful thing. They'll realize you're the same person that you were before your coming out and that you can fall in love exactly like they do. In the end we're all humans, and tolerance is something you learn.
Anonymous
October 23rd, 2018 7:25am
Try to reason with them. Tell them this is who you are, who always be this ways and there’s no diffrent then and now. If they care about you as much as you care about their feelings, they will try to understand even they don’t completely. They will never exclude you for you being you. But if not, pay them no mind. Your feelings matter than what their thought of your sexuality. Don’t be ashamed just because they don’t accept you being gay. They’re not accepting because they don’t understand. (yet) Tell them you have interesting things than your sexuality.
courageousSun82
March 26th, 2019 4:15am
Sometimes people don't understand what it's like to be in the LGBTQ+ community and won't be very accepting at first, but often people need time to understand and accept you for who you are. When I came out there were a few people that had a problem with it, but eventually, they realized I was the same person they were friends with the day before and they loved me all the same. It's important to remember who you are at times like this and to never be ashamed for coming out and being who you are. Things will get better.
Anonymous
August 10th, 2015 2:03am
That might be harsh but friends come and go, so I suggest leaving them and finding new ones that are accepting.
Anonymous
November 9th, 2015 6:18pm
You need to find new friends, if they were your true friends then they would,be accepting of who u are
freshLove97
June 13th, 2016 2:00pm
If your friends don't accept you being who you are, maybe you should rethink if they really are your friends. Real friends love you for your personality, sexual orientation should not be a factor.
Anonymous
January 30th, 2017 12:41pm
Well, if truth be told, if someone is truly your friend they will accept you no matter what. Of course, for some people it can take a bit more time but they should be able to love you for who you are and to appreciate your diversity. If they aren't accepting no matter how much you try to explain you're no different than them, then it might be time to meet new people.
Anonymous
November 21st, 2017 9:29am
Luckily we have our own community of understanding and friendship. They aren't true friends if they don't accept and love you for who you are. But fortunately there are a lot of people out there who will. You just haven't met them yet.
Anonymous
December 5th, 2017 3:07am
It is nothing to accept for anybody. It is your life, that is you and your characteristics. If they are not okay with me being LGBTQ, for me, they are just not my friends. So there is nothing to handle.
Anonymous
January 1st, 2018 12:11am
If they are actively against it, then let them go, it might hurt, but it'll be better for you in the long run. It won't be good to keep people around that dislike you for who you are.
hobbitwho
April 17th, 2015 9:11pm
I guess if they can't accept you, they're not supposed to be your friends. If someone on Earth doesn't apreciate your true self, send them away. It might hurt you, but you're better off without them.