How can you tell if you are a boy or a girl, or something else entirely?
211 Answers
Last Updated: 05/03/2022 at 5:54pm
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Lianne Kirby, MA in Counselling Psychology
Counselor
I believe everyone should have the opportunity for their voice to be heard. I use a trauma informed, person centred approach in counselling.
Top Rated Answers
Only you can decide and seek out your gender identity. It has nothing to do with how you were born or what pronouns others use to address you, it lies solely with what you connect with yourself. It's important to try new things to get a feel for where you feel comfortable, and if changing your name, pronouns, etc. is one of those new things, don't be afraid to try. If it feels right, it is.
I think expressing yourself without worrying about whether or not you are a girl boy or something else will lead you to an answer.
You can tell if you're a boy, girl, or something else in my opinion is you decide on what makes you happy the most. Yeah, society will try to beat you down but, if you feel confident, happy, and beautiful it shouldn't matter what others think of you. Do what makes you happy and not what others think will make you happy.
Anonymous
July 25th, 2015 4:51pm
Only you are qualified to answer that for yourself! You are the world's leading expert on you, and you have the power to own and define your own identity as and when you choose.
Your own inside voice and your feelings are always the most important things to listen to. Sexuality comes as a natural thing inside ourselves and nobody can tell better than ourselves.
How do we find out? We talk to ourselves, we meditate and ask ourselves how we feel and act.
Our brain and community classifies us into a gender role. Sometimes that may not feel specifically black or white. Girl, boy or someone different. Sexuality is diverse and deeply personal. Understanding your sexuality is about the feelings, thoughts, attractions and preferences you feel towards other people. There are different types of sexuality and it can take time to figure out what fits for you. Sometimes stereotypes may change over time, but eventually you will recognise what feels the most comfortable for you.
Anonymous
July 26th, 2015 3:26pm
There are various ways you can tell if you are a boy or girl. Once you begin to start having feelings that you associate more with the other gender, you should try researching some of the ways to figure out where you fall in the different genders. Once are more or less sure about how you identify, you should confide in someone you are close to. Possibly a close friend/sibling, from then on it becomes easier to deal with the weight of your secret and make it easier to come out to more people.
Only you can decide because you know yourself best. However you feel the most "at home" or the most like... You.. You know you've found it! Ifbyou dont identify with either gender, that is okay too! Dont feel pressured into putting a gender label on yourself!
I think the question is, does it matter? I know we tend to categorize everyone and everything, which is natural, though I honestly believe that as long as you love yourself - it doesn't matter.
When you first figure out your gender, It's usually when you're in your teen years. You feel strange in your body. It doesn't feel right. You want to change yourself.
It can be so hard when struggling to identify outside of the traditional gender binary (male or female). I identify as gender queer, and was thankful to find the concept after years of struggling to fit in and understand why I wasn't like the other girls. There's no simple answer to this question for many struggling with gender identity. Learning about the many other gender identities and questioning my idea of my own gender helped me to better understand where I fall into the spectrum.
Anonymous
July 30th, 2015 9:19pm
The best thing to do is not worry about it and do not let what anyone else says effect you. You are yourself and that is for sure and you are right being however you feel.
What I found about realizing that I was genderfluid, more along the line of trans is that people who are cisgendered rarely wonder if they may be trans.
No one can tell you if you're a boy or a girl or something entirely else. It's all in your mind and your body. If you start to question who you are, don't bash yourself for it, explore it, gender is not determined by your parts, it's determined by your feeling. Only you can be the judge of what you are. And don't let anyone else tell you differently.
It's all about how you feel. You just have to make sure you explore yourself in every way you know.
This can be very difficult to tell. When I discovered I was not the gender I was assigned at birth, I thought to myself "I am a girl." When that didn't feel right, I thought "I am a boy." That didn't quite feel right either! Luckily, there are many different terms on the gender identity spectrum, such as genderfluid, demigirl/boy, agender, and others. Try researching gender identity and applying these to yourself, and see which one fits. Gender is largely about your internal feelings, and outward expression comes second. I hope this was helpful!
Anonymous
August 12th, 2015 5:27pm
There is a broad spectrum of identities, whether it's gender, sexuality etc. Nowadays you can go by whatever "label" you want to - you can even choose to not identify by any label at all. The best way to tell whether you're a boy, girl, or something else entirely (as simple as this sounds) is to go by how you feel. Do you feel like a girl? Like a boy? Like neither? Like both? Just know that whatever you're feeling is okay, and you don't need to explain yourself to anyone.
It all boils down to stereotypes. I personally don't believe in gender roles, however I do understand them. You should ask yourself what you feel you relate to most? What feels right for you? Make sure you feel comfortable in your own skin, and find your gender identity by what comes easiest.
It's how you feel. Regardless of the body you're born in, figure out what you identify with the strongest. Don't worry if that takes a lot of time, it is more important to be accurate, than to be quick.
Anonymous
August 13th, 2015 12:34pm
Honey, it's how you feel. If you don't feel like a boy, then don't identify as male. If you don't feel female, then don't identify as female. Feel like neither? Then don't be either. Just be yourself.
You are who you know, that person you have always known yourself to be is neither one absolute or another. It is not all about genitalia, or blues or pinks, there are so many shades in between and none are wrong.
Anonymous
August 14th, 2015 4:48am
I'm not sure that there is any "right" answer for this. Gender is certainly a lot more than your DNA or what body parts you have- gender identity can be very complex. I guess it's about what makes you feel good, what feels the most like you. Transitioning/ discovering your gender identity/ lack of is no simple thing. Please seek help from knowledgeable individuals if you are struggling with this very important part of your life.
Anonymous
August 14th, 2015 3:49pm
I think that isn't really something other people can answer for you. It's purely based on what you're comfortable and happy labeling yourself.
Anonymous
August 14th, 2015 9:45pm
The best way to tell if someone is a boy or girl, or something else, is to just ask them. Then you can know for sure.
it's a feeling, ask yourself what you're
feeling, how is that feeling relating to be certaing gender
Gender is a personal experience that describes how you and society perceive yourself. A boy isn't a boy because he has short hair and plays baseball, and a girl isn't a girl because she wears dresses and plays with dolls. Gender roles is not the same as a gender identity. If you believe you feel male or female or something else without that pressure to conform to gender roles, that's how you start to realize where this misalignment comes from.
Finding your sexuality is not an easy thing, but the time u take to do so is worth it. Take your time and get to know your sexuality.
The answer when questioning your gender and sex doesn't come easily, far from it. But whatever you are you are still human, and being able to tell what you are comes with time. You can be a boy, a girl, both or neither, it's up to you. Don't try to judge yourself too quickly let what happens happen and go with how you feel above all else.
You know if you are a boy or girl by the way you feel in your heart, don't ever let someone tell you what you can and can not be.
Ask them. There's no problem in asking. If you don't want to be straight on that topic, ask what pronouns they'd like you to use.
Or, try to stop fitting people on boxes. Is hard, but you can do it with a little bit of training.
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