I am confused about my sexuality. Im 16 and unsure about what my sexuality is. I do not wish to experiment because of slut shaming. How can I determinate my sexuality?
4 Answers
Last Updated: 06/29/2020 at 7:10pm


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Deane Rain Marie, LMFT
Marriage & Family Therapist
I take a holistic approach in working with eating disorders, mood disorders, relationships, and the LGBTQ community. I use EMDR, Dreamwork, Stories, CBT and Cinema therapy.
Top Rated Answers
I like to think of sexuality as something that develops over personal experience. It may seem scary at first. However, your sexuality will develop into what it wants. I have personal experience with this and it’s scary to not be like everyone else. It’s also difficult at times. But it does get better. As you get older, you grow into yourself and want you want to be because you’ll realize that you deserve the same happiness as everyone else. It gets easier because you’ll meet people who are like you and discover who you are together, it’s a fun but scary process.
Well, it really comes down to getting to know yourself first. You don't have to experiment right off the bat, as there are all kinds of indicators you could look for. For example, when you're walking down the street, do you find your gaze unconsciously flicking more towards girls or guys? Maybe both? (In that case you might be bisexual, or perhaps pansexual) Is it because you feel attracted towards him/her/them? Try exploring all the different terms, getting to know the community, and most importantly - give yourself some time. No one's forcing you to stamp a label onto yourself, and especially not if you're unsure of it. Its also crucial to note that thinking about being with a certain gender doesnt necessarily mean anything for your sexuality. It could be nothing. But then again, it could be something?
Your sexuality isn't based on experience, but simply on the attraction you feel. Analyzing your own feelings, emotions and desires is enough to determine who you are! Maybe you can try to imagine yourself with different people and see how that makes you feel.
You don't have to put yourself a label, you know. Maybe one day you will just feel it and then you will know
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