I am a compassionate, solution-focused therapist, with over 17 years experience in the field of Mental Health counseling. I provide nonjudgmental support and education.
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April 10th, 2015 10:00pm
Essentially it means whatever you want it to mean, but I would guess you might relate to the idea of having a fluid gender, which is a gender identity that can change depending on the day. There might be a particular set of genders you switch between, and they may be drastically different, or they may be similar. There is also gender flux for if you find your gender more fluctuates rather than changes completely. Also keep in mind "either gender" isn't accurate, as there are far more than two genders. Your identity may lie somewhere on the non-binary spectrum -- genders that aren't wholly male or wholly female. These identities include being genderless, as well as terms that describe being partially one gender and partially another (or several others). Gender identity can be really confusing, but it's okay if you don't know what label suits you right now, which pronouns you identify with, if you change your mind later, or if you don't want a label at all. It's okay to take your time figuring it all out. Your feelings are real and valid no matter what.
I would most likely think that you're Non-binary which means gender identity that don't fit within the accepted binary of male and female. People can feel they are both, neither, or some mixture thereof. Though it's really up to you what you'd like to label it as, you don't even have to label at all.
The term for this that's usually used is Gender Queer, which can be an umbrella term or an identity. If you feel like you flip flop between genders, it's likely you're gender fluid. If you feel like you identify as neither, it's likely you're genderqueer. Remember any and al identities are valid and whatever you feel is who you are is right :)
Well there are actually a lot more genders other than just male and female. You could be genderfluid, non-binary, bigender, trigender, etc. You don't have to rush to put a label on yourself, but just know that there are plenty of people who identify the same as you do, and not defining with one particular gender is completely normal!
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December 21st, 2015 6:57pm
Not identifying with a single gender is usually known as being gender fluid or non-binary. It can be scary to think about it, and it can be even scarier to talk to someone about it. Starting with someone you're close to can help. If you're worried about talking to somone who knows you so why not chat to a listener anonymously!
You may be genderfluid, dear! And I know how that feels. Gender fluidity can be a little odd at first, but once you get used to it, it's easy to deal with. I, for example, have found a pattern in the fluctuations in my gender. Of course, you could also be some other form of non-binary too.
It could mean that you identify as genderqueer or genderfluid. Typically people who identify this way feel masculine on some days and feminine on others, or neither! Often they will prefer gender neutral pronouns or use the pronouns depending on how they identify that day. Perfectly okay to identify this way!
It might mean that you are gender fluid. Some people's gender identity changes over time, and can be one thing one day, and something else on another day. This is okay, and says nothing bad about your character.
There are many different genders. Some people identify as both at once, with one sometimes being stronger than the other. Some people, like myself, switch in between genders, which is called gender fluidity. You can look up "List of gender identities" and read to see which one applies to you
It can mean whatever you want it to mean. That may sound vague, but the gender spectrum is so broad that often people just choose whatever term means the most to them! I have friends who identify as agender that sometimes feel pulled towards male, female, or other. Others identify as genderqueer, or genderfluid. Taking the time to read about the different gender concepts can be a great way to find what works for you.
This could mean several things. Maybe you don't feel comfortable with the way you present yourself in terms of your gender, and wish you could look a bit more masculine/feminine/androgynous. That could mean you're experiencing a bit of gender dysphoria. Maybe you sometimes you feel secure as male, sometimes you feel secure as female, and sometimes you feel secure as neither, or both. That could mean you might identify as something like genderfluid, or genderflux. Maybe you just don't feel like "male" or "female" apply to you, and you might be agender/non-binary/etc.
The first step to discovering more about your gender is to ask yourself: What would make me happiest? Would you be happier if people referred to you by different pronouns? Would you be happier if you started wearing skirts, or started wearing a binder? Would you be happier if people started referring to you by a different name?
For some people like myself, sexuality can be easy to figure out. I know I'm pansexual and can be attracted to anyone. I'm still, however, trying to learn about my gender. All you have to do, though, is keep learning and surround yourself with people that want to help and encourage you to learn about yourself.
It means that you are genderfluid and identify with qualities perceived as both "feminine' or 'masculine' depending on the day, hour, minute, etc. You have the freedom to not be boxed into a gender binary. In fact, some would argue there are infinite types of genders, versus just male and female. This means you are fluid with your gender identity.