Moderated by
Amy Green, MA; LMFT
Marriage & Family Therapist
I am a Licensed Marriage Family Therapist in the state of California and Oregon. I've been in private practice for 10 years and have been in the counseling field for 15 years.
Top Rated Answers
I love this question. You should come out of the closet when you are dressed to be who you are. Come out on your own time. When you are comfortable. When you are confident. When you are ready. Coming out isn't necessary at any moment in time. Not until you feel like you want to. You can come out tomorrow or you can come out in 20 years. The time to come out is different for everyone and you'll know in your heart when the time is right because you'll find yourself inclined to scream it out at the top of your lungs.
Anonymous
April 10th, 2015 12:20am
When you feel that you are safe, and that you will be safe telling. It is not best to come out when there is risk, but drop small ideas on sexualities and genders and what-not to see how the ones you are asking react.
When you are finished getting dressed. No I am joking, if you feel comfortable revealing your sexuality with your family members or if you are just plain tired of hiding it. Either way, you pick when you're ready and maybe you might never be.
Whenever you feel comfortable enough to do so, it can be a scary thought but it is okay but take your time.
You should judge your environment first. If it is safe to do so, then go right on ahead. If you ever have any doubts with anything, it is best not to come out until a later date.
When it's physically, emotionally and financially safe for you. And when you feel ready. Don't let anyone pressure you to come out before you're ready, because they may not understand that there might be worse consequences for others than for themselves. However, the longer you wait, the greater the chances are that your family will find out on their own, which takes away your chance to control the setting and can leave you vulnerable to accusations of dishonesty. Most families suspect ahead of time and some family members will do some quiet snooping while others prefer to ignore the possibility.
Anonymous
November 9th, 2014 10:18pm
To be honest, when you come out of the closet should depend on you. You shouldn't come out until you feel comfortable with who you are and until you're sure you're ready to come out of the closet.
When you're ready. There's never a single thing that makes you ready. It's always taking a leap, and you have to be ready for the results, whatever they will be. It's one of the scariest things that I've ever done, and yet, I don't regret it for a second.
Whenever you are ready and prepared to. You have to be comfortable enough to be able to fully confess and tell what and who you truly are.
Anonymous
July 16th, 2018 12:59pm
Whenever you want to. It’ll be hard and there really is no perfect time to do it. Never come out though if there is a chance of danger presented to you
Whenever you feel ready. It's entirely up to you. I'm slowly coming out at the moment and you have to base it on how you feel so that you don't get rushed. Feel free to message me if anyone is struggling with this ☺.
Anonymous
November 6th, 2014 1:18am
When you feel ready. Nobody knows your times more than you. And for that I mean that you should do it only if you feel comfortable about it. And the most important thing is: not putting pressure on it.
you should come out of the closet when you feel the most comfortable letting the people around you know about your sexuality
It depends. If you live in a conservative area, your family, friends, or community in general have shown homophobic tendencies, you may want to wait, especially if you live in a small town where news travels quickly. But, if you feel you will be accepted by the people that matter, go ahead. You might not want to come out to the whole world at the moment, but find someone you can trust to tell,
When you feel is a right time, only you can decide when. But just know people love and accept you just the way you are!
When you are ready to. It's not something you should force upon yourself but let it happen when it does.
Anonymous
November 16th, 2014 11:09pm
whenever you are comfortable to. i actually am still in the closet about my sexuality and that is okay. you need to make sure you are ready and comfortable to. do whatever is best for you!
That is very simple - when ever you feel ready. That is not something you can rush, you should come out whenever you feel the time is right. I wish you the best of luck x
Anonymous
April 29th, 2015 6:00am
Whenever you feel the time is right. It is easier to come out to one person at a time. Start with your closest friend, someone that you can tell anything to and you know will support you. Talk to them about ways to come out to other people. Come out to your parents and ask them for help on how to tell other friends or family members also.
When you're ready and realise that you don't need their permission or denial but their acceptance, that's when.
when you feel ready and comfortable, and only you can know when that is :)
Whenever you are ready. There is nothing more liberating than knowing that you can be who you want to be. Don't be afraid to tell anyone, because they will love you just the way you are. You have to give people time to embrace it, it's not an easy subject to bring up or to accept. Be yourself, that's what you're good at.
Nobody can answer this question but you. The choice to come out is yours, and yours alone. There is never a perfect time for this.
Ask yourself if you feel comfortable and strong enough to face any reaction you may receive. You are who you are! No one can change that, nor should they try. Your family will love you no matter what and your friends will love you no matter what. Just because you are gay/lesbian doesn't change you as a person. Your sexuality does not define you in the slightest!
Anonymous
August 11th, 2015 10:59pm
This is such a difficult question to answer. But I feel as if I should come out when I am 100% sure that it's the way I feel.
Come out the closet when you are most comfortable , never rush it. The right time to come out will come! :)
Whenever you feel the time is right. Make sure you are comfortable with it before you allow everyone to know about it. You want to be sure that you are very confident and comfortable before coming out about it.
Anonymous
November 10th, 2015 4:24am
when you are ready. you shouldn't feel pressured to do anything you don't want to and only you get to decide
You should come out of the closet when you are ready for people to know. You don't have to tell everyone at once. It takes some people years to tell everyone. Coming out to a good friend, family member, or trusted person first can help you get a start on telling others, but it does not have to be right away.
This is the infamous question I'm so passionate about.
This step in your life will happen when you decide you want it to. Don't feel rushed in having to come out, take your time, feel around until you know that you are sure this is how you feel. Wait until the stress and tension ease away in the house. Make sure you have a group of friends that support you and have your back. No matter how ready you are, you will be nervous. Make sure you stay cool, calm, and collected so your relatives can take in the news because it will be huge!
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