Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Would it be appropriate for me to tell people at work my sexual orientation?

25 Answers
Last Updated: 11/29/2021 at 5:27am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Melissa Strauss, LPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I am client focused and believe everyone has a strength. I feel confident in seeing clients with generalized and social anxiety, depression and relational goals.

Top Rated Answers
kindheartedSky78
April 12th, 2015 3:57pm
I think I would be asking myself the question, why you would want to tell your colleagues your sexual orientation and why you feel it is important
Anonymous
March 29th, 2016 3:32pm
It depends on the situation. If a coworker of the opposite sex asks you out, tries to flirt with you, etc; and you prefer the same sex, politely deny them and explain to them why. It doesn't have to be public knowledge in your workplace if you don't want it to be.
Anonymous
February 9th, 2016 11:33pm
It depends if your workplace is a safe space, and if you feel comfortable, mainly. As well, if you're being hounded and questioned about it, it might be best to just tell people about it.
Aayla
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
July 1st, 2019 1:20am
There are no fixed rules for that. In general, coming out is something very personal, in the sense that it's up to each individual to decide if, when, how and to whom to come out. If you believe that telling them will make you feel better than not telling them, you can go for it! You should be free to express yourself and live your identity openly, if that's what you wish.
gracefulHeart44
March 29th, 2016 8:31pm
I think that you should do what makes you feel comfortable. If you feel that you should tell them your sexuality then I think you should, but if you don't feel comfortable or you feel like they will judge you, then maybe it is better if you keep it to yourself. Really, it's all up to what you feel is comfortable.
mayssamk
February 22nd, 2016 6:41pm
If you feel like you want to then yes, why not. Do whatever you need to do to make your work place somewhere where you can be yourself, fully and wholly. I think that's what's important.
Anonymous
May 6th, 2015 2:45pm
Honestly, it's up to you whether or not you want to disclose that information. It really isn't a big deal, and no one needs to know your orientation. I would be careful, though. If your orientation isn't accepted by them, things can get pretty nasty. So, in short, you don't have to tell anyone. If you feel obliged to, go ahead. Contact me if you have any LGBT issues.
Gabocha3086
November 23rd, 2015 6:39pm
I think is not of their business to know but if somebody ask you just be yourself and tell then otherwise tou are not force to share your private life with everyone
Anonymous
May 31st, 2015 3:56pm
If you feel the need to, you can. If you don't think its a big deal and you think they wouldn't mind, you can treat your sexuality as they would theirs. If you hear someone at work making general homophobic comments, you can stand up and say "I'm (insert sexuality here) and that's extremely offensive."
Anonymous
November 29th, 2021 5:27am
You should come out whenever you feel is the right time. And also if you are really close with your work mates then you can consider telling people about your sexual orientation because there is nothing wrong in that. If you feel it will make you more comfortable doing that then you should definitely do it. Many think others will judge based on their sexual orientation but you can't hide your true self from yourself for long. You can't live like someone else, if you want you can let the world know who you are and nothing to be ashamed of because it is totally normal.
Blynng
May 28th, 2019 6:11pm
My general thoughts in regards to this is that the only people who have a true need to know regarding your sexual orientation are you and the partners you are looking to connect with. That being said, my next question would be, why has this come up as a question in the first place? Are your coworkers choosing to make political statements about the LGBTQ community under the assumption that they have the freedom to do so? Does your workplace have explicit directives about what conversation topics are appropriate and inappropriate for the workplace? If your coworkers are making poor choices with their words, I would raise a concern with your direct supervisor or HR. There is no need to make an announcement, because it's no one else's business. I guess this is the long answer to say that no, I don't think it's appropriate to discuss sexual orientation at work in general. Unless your work is specifically related to the sex industry or your orientation provides you the opportunity to give unique perspectives that they are seeking for a project or product, there are few circumstances where a coworker would need to know who you found sexually attractive (if you feel these feelings that is). So you need to consider the "why" behind your wondering, and act accordingly.
softCandy87
August 13th, 2018 9:03am
If you feel comfortable telling people about your sexuality, don’t feel presured into telling everyone, it is ok to take your time with these thoughts
Helpinghandkumar
May 15th, 2018 4:16am
You would need to know how comfortable they are with people of a sexual orientation outside the binary spectrum. It would definitely be appropriate, but it might cause you some problems as people uncomfortable with your orientation might cause you untoward grief.
lovingTree37
April 2nd, 2018 5:14pm
Certainly don't do it off the bat (as in just randomly saying "hi I'm gay/pan/other") just for the reason of a) people probably won't care and b) it's a bit odd. But slipping it into conversations fine.
Anonymous
October 16th, 2017 10:29am
Your sexuality is a part of you, and if you feel comfortable sharing that, then do so! If it were to come up, it certainly would not be inappropriate to mention it. But, keep it professional as always.
Anonymous
April 10th, 2017 11:23am
I don't see why it wouldn't be appropriate. Unless you work in a homophobic environment or you don't feel like you work in a safe space.
adeba26
February 28th, 2017 11:17pm
You don't have to, if you don't want. Your sexual orientation is nothing to be ashamed of, and you don't have to state what you like to every single person you meet and worry about what they would think of you.
Camamam
June 3rd, 2015 2:35am
You must do what is comfortable for you. If you feel like letting your coworkers know, go right ahead. But defiantly do not feel obligated to tell anybody you don't want to, it is totally your business and you can as you wish with it !
Kaysha
September 7th, 2015 2:36pm
Of course it'd be appropriate, if you feel you are close enough to your co-workers and you want them to know the true you then go ahead.
Breathedani
January 30th, 2015 5:09am
This is honestly a hard choice. I am gay, and if I was in your shoes I would not tell anyone at work my sexual orientation. Although I am openly gay, I would not want to risk losing my job if my boss or a co-worker turned out to be homophobic.... Good luck!
TheGreyFixer
January 11th, 2016 6:05pm
If they ask you or comment on it, then you should be fine to tell them. If you really want to tell them without them asking, casually drop it into conversation. I wouldn't advise announcing it over the PA system or throwing a parade, but there's no harm in letting your coworkers get to know you a little more. As long as you're not broadcasting your sexual exploits or coming on to your peers, there's nothing inappropriate about it.
Anonymous
January 5th, 2016 5:08am
l believe it is appropriate to tell as problems might arise if you don't tell anyone. At any work position, it is always best to be completely honest with all your actions and everything you say and such a thing like hiding your sexual orientation can affect staff/employees around you. So in my case as l will repeat myself, l feel it is best to tell people at work of your sexual orientation.
Anonymous
January 4th, 2016 3:53pm
You can tell whoever you want about your sexual orientation. It's just as much of a part of you as your eye color or height or shoe size or whatever. The only piece of advice I have for you is that you may want to wait until you're relatively friendly with this person as oftentimes sudden revelations can startle people and make them a bit uncomfortable. They may feel as if they now have to confide something in you and that could make everything a bit awkward. But it's your orientation to tell, and do it whenever you feel ready!
gentleDreamer72
December 29th, 2015 3:01pm
Yes, absolutely! It's important for workplaces to be accepting of all types of sexual orientations and gender identities and to embrace diversity. If anyone at your workplace comments negatively on your sexual orientation or treats you meanly because of that, that is legally classified as sexual harassment.
Herequeerandcheering
December 14th, 2015 3:42am
Yes it is as long as you feel it's the right time and you feel that it's safe. It is completely appropriate though.