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How do I know if I'm gay, lesbian, or bisexual?

303 Answers
Last Updated: 07/14/2021 at 10:14pm
How do I know if I'm gay, lesbian, or bisexual?
★ This question about LGBTQ+ Issues was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
Jenniferroseh98
August 7th, 2015 6:11pm
The best way to find out is by experimenting but make sure the other person knows this and they are not looking for a long term relationship.
Jackinthetardis
August 7th, 2015 10:48pm
You just know it's like knowing if your straight. What genders are you in love with? Or when you fall in love with someone
famouspizza
August 8th, 2015 7:08am
Sexuality can be really confusing for a lot of people, and all that confusion can lead people to question their own sexual orientation. When trying to discover your sexuality, you should ask yourself a few questions: 1) Am I attracted to members as the same sex? 2) Am I attracted to members of the same sex EXCLUSIVELY, or do I feel attraction to members of both genders? 3) How long have I felt like this? And remember, sexual orientation has to do with sexual attraction: if you experience sexual arousal in regards to members of the same sex, or members of both sexes, then you're probably homosexual or bisexual. And there's absolutely nothing wrong with being gay or bi, but sometimes it takes a while to accept yourself for who you are in regards to your orientation. It can sometimes feel frustrating, but it is worth taking the time to discover whether or not you are gay, lesbian, or bisexual.
BellaBoo97
August 8th, 2015 3:21pm
It is as simple as who you are attracted to, if you are a male attracted to males you are gay, if it is a female attracted to females you're lesbian and if you are attracted to both you are bi!
Sammy01
August 8th, 2015 10:20pm
Simple answer: Have you ever experienced attraction (romantic or sexual) to somebody of the same gender as you? Society attaches a lot of unnecessary and stressful connotations to that decision, but at the end of the day that's all it is.
soothingMoon97
August 9th, 2015 1:36am
I believe finding your sexual identity may and vary from person to person. In a nutshell, it's generally having a sexual and/or emotional attraction towards a certain, *or both* sex.
Anonymous
August 9th, 2015 8:09am
It's different for many people. I found out I was Bi when I started to feel aroused at the sight of beautiful women. Some people know from birth, some discover later on in life.
KindredSpirit108
August 9th, 2015 4:32pm
There is no one way to know if you are a member of the LGBT community, but the easiest way to know might be to pay attention to whom you are sexually attracted. If you are predominantly sexually attracted to people of the same sex, you might be gay or lesbian. If you are equally or nearly equally attracted to people of both sexes, you may be bisexual. Sexuality is a complex part of your identity and is composed of many factors. Don't feel any pressure to decide what your sexuality is before you are ready. Talk with people from a variety of different sexual orientations who are warm and welcoming to clarify how you feel about who you are. Keep in mind it is never wrong or bad to be who you truly are.
bubblegumComfort28
August 12th, 2015 12:04am
If you feel a close connection with the opposite sex. If bisexual then you will feel this with both sexes. Not just a connection, but a sense of intimacy.
Jay9816
August 12th, 2015 3:01am
It all depends what you are into honestly, it may take time to figure that out so just dont go kissing random guys and just to 'test' it. Sometimes you can't figure out what you like until later on in life. Let's say God, or whatever you believe your higher power is wanted you to like pickles, but you in your (let's say 13) entire 13 years of living never tried a pickle! :O And once you try it you realize you love it! So if you want to experiment go right ahead (again this does not mean kiss random people, this is not safe) But if you are not the experimenting type don't worry! It'll come to you and you will know when the time is right. Just be patient:) Stay strong :)
Anonymous
August 12th, 2015 5:20am
I am all sexes and no sexes. I do not require a body to love. ~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
sleepypoett
August 12th, 2015 9:56am
Well, first you'd need to know that there are many more options on the sexuality spectrum, like asexual and pansexual. My advice: feelings first, labels later. Don't worry too much about which label you fall under. If you have romantic/sexual feelings for someone, examine and build on those before deciding your sexual identity.
Anonymous
August 12th, 2015 2:10pm
You'll get those flutter between your legs or butterflies when you see the same sex and that's when you'll know.
MaggieListens00
August 14th, 2015 7:39am
There isn't really a set way to find out if you're gay, lesbian or bi it's different from person to person. What works for you may not for someone else however put yourself out there! Meet people in the LGBT community go to some events, experiment a little bit. If you also think about it which gender could you see yourself settling down with and if you can't decide maybe you just need to wait a little while? :) Hope this helped if not only a little :)
Anonymous
August 14th, 2015 9:47pm
I think if you feel more attracted to the same gender (or both in the case of bisexuality), whether it be romantic or otherwise.
UrBeautiful25
August 15th, 2015 1:40am
When you start falling for someone who is the same gender as you. Or when you like two people who are both genders. You really will just know it will come to you
SofiaC996
August 15th, 2015 10:06pm
Your sexuality is something that you discover and experience until you know what you like and what you don't. You shouldn't worry about labeling yourself or putting any pressure into defining it. And about how you know, you just do, you'll know.
Anonymous
August 20th, 2015 6:32am
I can honestly say, that finding out if you are straight, bi, or gay is the hardest question to answer in your lifetime. I myself have just came to terms that I am bisexual, because I can fall in love with a man or a woman. If you are gay the thought of dating the opposite gender wouldn't appeal to you, even though you may date the opposite gender while closeted. If you are straight, you either know you want the opposite sex, or you are a little bi-curious, but could never end up with the same Sex. Don't let anyone around you define who you are. If you like both sexes, you are normal. If you like the same sex, you are normal. If you like the opposite sex, you are normal. It's all love, follow your HEART.
AliceInWonderland1997
September 22nd, 2015 3:49pm
That depends on you. If you happen to like guys more and your a guy your gay or bi if you'd prefer. If you like girls more your lesbian if your a girl ot bi of you'd prefer.
pegacornqueen
October 5th, 2015 4:25pm
Your sexual orientation is who you are sexually attracted to. If you're a guy sexually attracted to other males, you would be considered gay. If you're a girl sexually attracted to girls, lesbian. And if you're attracted to both, bisexual. This however is different from your romantic orientation, which is essentially the same thing, but who you're romantically interested in.
Matt99
November 10th, 2015 7:18pm
The truth is it's different for everyone. The words we use seem binary in their meaning, yet sexuality is a spectrum. Really it is whatever you make of it. Whatever you "want". That really is the freedom of being you. You are an individual and you will just know. It is fine to safely experiment with people you trust (love) if you feel ready.
Anonymous
December 12th, 2015 4:17pm
I thought a lot about this and i figured out that i was lesbian when i started dating boys. Try dating boys and see what happens.
Allisa
December 13th, 2015 4:16pm
In my experience, You just know. I've known since I was 8 like I was bisexual. If you have intense feelings for one gender of for both and you know that they are genuine then you just go from there. But labels aren't important.
victoriousWings82
December 14th, 2015 4:21pm
First you have to ask yourself are you ready to go down that road do you really want to know that anwser if your answer is no don't even finish reading if the answer is yes then you have to think are emotionally AND physically attractive to the opposite and/or both genders if you are then the last test would be to try to have a relationship with someone and find out
demonhunterkaz2y5
December 14th, 2015 10:27pm
What gender (or genders) are you attracted to? You can also be attracted to inanimate object, such as pans.
oliverjayy
December 16th, 2015 1:55am
You'd know in the same way that you would know if you were straight! If you feel a physical, sexual, and/or romantic attraction to guys, girls, or both, then you find out whether you are gay, lesbian, or bisexual! Trust me, though, it takes many people a LOT of time to strictly figure out what they are, so don't fret! Allow life to take its course and give it some time to really develop your understanding of your sexuality and your attractions :)
Anonymous
December 16th, 2015 11:45pm
Im straight but when i would question it, i would think of my dream wedding and who i would want standing there or who i would want to be holding hands with.
TwentyOneFriesss
December 17th, 2015 5:35am
if you have been having romantic and or sexual feelings about the oppisit gender for a bit of time,
Anonymous
December 17th, 2015 11:35am
Well for me, I noticed that I started seeing the same sex differently and started getting more attracted to them and wondering about the same sex in a sexual way. When my friends would show me pictures of guys they thought were "hot" I would just say "Yea, he is alright" and I wouldn't think of the guy in a sexual way because I obviously wasn't attracted to males. But I guess every situation is different for every different person.
ashbradbury42
December 18th, 2015 12:57am
If you are a gay man, you like men. If you are a gay woman/lesbian, you like women. If you are bi, you like two genders.