Do you recommend coming out to a teacher before your parents?
Last Updated: 08/11/2020 at 7:18pm
Brenda King, PsyD
I treat life changes, women’s issues, and issues of aging using evidence-based treatments with healthy doses of warmth, empathy and humor to enhance healing and growth.
Top Rated Answers
Yes. It does help to have a confidante who is mature enough to understand what you're going through and yet has no personal relationship to you. It can give one a chance to open up without the fear of being judged or being ridiculed. So, yes. I do recommend to come out to a teacher before your parents. Pro: they can support you when you finally decide to open up and come out to your mom or dad or both. Con: It may take a level of comfort to reach first with your teacher, before letting them know about how you feel .
I'd say it varies for each person. It could help to come out to a teacher first since they generally are not there hold any judgement against you and are there to support you any way you can. If you are paranoid about telling your parents, speaking to a teacher first could help you build up confidence and provide some comfort. If you plan on coming out to your parents anyway, some might find it useful to get it over and done with since a teacher cannot change your parents opinion. There isn't a definite answer and it's about what you are comfortable with. If you do decide to come out to a teacher, choose one you are comfortable to talk to as it makes things easier for you. Good luck! :)
It depends on your relationship with your teacher and with your parents. If you feel more comfortable with your teacher and think they'd be more affirming, it's totally fine to come out to them first (however, I'd recommend making sure they are aware your parents don't know so they don't accidentally spill the beans). If you're more comfortable with your parents and think they'd be more affirming, it's totally fine to come out to THEM first! It really all comes down to what you're comfortable with!
There's no rule for coming out, except doing it when, how and with whom you prefer. If you feel more confident coming out with someone outside the family first, that's the way to go! What truly matters is that you feel good, if you feel like talking to a teacher is a good first step that will make you feel more confident and supported, then it's a good idea to do it!
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