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How can i know for sure if im a lesbian or just bisexual?

25 Answers
Last Updated: 01/21/2020 at 10:28am
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Top Rated Answers
May 10th, 2015 2:45pm
Well, sexuality is very fluid. You might be a lesbian now, or "seemingly" a lesbian, because you've only encountered women that you're attracted to. It is possible that someday you will become attracted to a man, and there's nothing wrong with that. Your sexuality doesn't have to fit in one neat pre-defined box. It's okay if you develop an attraction to men, when you previously thought you were not attracted to them at all. It's also okay to never develop feelings for a man. If you feel more comfortable identifying as a lesbian, you can identify as a lesbian until you no longer feel it's the proper description for your sexuality.
November 22nd, 2015 1:52pm
Only time will tell. You can ask yourself : can i picture myself with a guy in the future as in can I possibly get married to a guy or do i only imagine myself with a girl?
March 2nd, 2015 5:40pm
If you're not sure it's totally fine. Remember that you can love everyone - all love is real love. There's no need to rush with putting a label on it.
June 21st, 2016 2:00am
Honestly, sexuality labels should be used by the individual for the individual. If using the label lesbian fits your experiences or what you wish to experience, then you are a lesbian. If you're more comfortable with the label bisexual, you can use that label. A lot of women experience some attraction to men (often termed 'compulsory heterosexuality') and still call themselves lesbians, because they choose to prioritize their attraction to women. The best part is, if you choose one label now you can always change it in the future. Your sexuality and experiences belong to you, and you alone.
November 7th, 2017 3:51am
Well, I would say that if you experience any attraction to males, you would be bisexual, but if it's strictly an attraction to females, you would be a lesbian. However, these are just labels, and not everyone needs a label. You love whoever you want to love.
March 6th, 2015 2:27pm
There is no other way than to listen to your own feelings. Just know that it's alright to be any of the two, or bisexual with a preference - the only thing that matters here is your own self.
March 8th, 2016 11:13pm
I'm a firm believer about the notion that the only one that can truly decide your sexuality is you. Your sexual identity is solely about your interests, and views. Looking up the definitions, experimentation, and talking to lesbians and bisexuals are also good methods.
April 13th, 2015 7:14pm
I would really love to be able to answer this question for you as this must cause a lot of confusion for you. I guess that the only one who can answer this question is you. Personally I do not feel it massively important to label yourself. What do you think?
April 29th, 2015 6:01am
If you are a lesbian you have no interest in boys at all, you aren't attracted to them and none of them are cute. You don't find there bodies erotic or sexual in anyway. If you're bisexual it just means that you are attracted to both sexes.
May 3rd, 2015 2:25pm
You may get some clarity with a bit of time. Just try to remember that you can identify as something and then later down the track discover that the label may not fit you very well. It's okay to change if its what you feel is right for you. Nothing is set in stone.
November 11th, 2015 2:19am
It just takes time. Let yourself feel every emotion that pops up. No matter the gender of that person. Labels like bisexual and lesbian can empower, but don't force them. You'll know when it is time.
November 28th, 2017 11:03am
Bisexuality varies between every person. Some bisexual people. For example, some people might lean more towards males than females or vice versa and still be bisexual. It doesn't matter how much you lean towards a specific gender (or lack of), you can still be bisexual if you are attracted towards more than one gender at all. I would say just take your time and try to figure it out naturally :)
April 2nd, 2018 5:21pm
Try it! Be with guys be with girls enjoy yourself and if you prefer girls to guys fine! If not also fine! It's a spectrum you may even prefer girls but are still attracted to some guys the key is experience
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
June 10th, 2019 7:45pm
Take your time to analyze and explore your own feelings, emotions, desires and dreams. Maybe you can imagine yourself with boys and with girls, ponder the way you look at them, fantasize about them, and see how all of this makes you feel. Remember there's no need to rush or to feel pressured to identify with an orientation until you feel sure and confident. Ultimately, there's no right or wrong, there is only what you feel you are, and that's your identity.
November 18th, 2015 11:22am
It all depends on who you are attracted to.
February 29th, 2016 7:46pm
If you're even questioning this chances are you are bisexual. You might have a slight preference towards females which isn't unheard of. Your sexuality is all your own and you may identify however you'd like.
April 25th, 2016 2:19am
Depending on which sex you are attracted to. Sexuality is a very tricky thing, it takes time and effort to know which sexuality you are. But take all the time you need as this will be something that you will have to leave with for life.
May 14th, 2018 11:56pm
You will know trust me, If you feel someone, go with what your heart tells you and never give up, one day your find out I promise, I can not answer that because only you know the true answer.
June 22nd, 2015 9:32pm
If you feel something more for just girls then you're lesbian. But you have feelings for both -boy and girl- then you're bisexual.
December 8th, 2015 1:28pm
Bisexual: When you love some people of either sex & can't provide a rational, cogent, logical explanation for it. It doesn't matter me and I think it's worth contemplating if it should matter you
May 31st, 2016 1:51pm
Do you need to throw a label onto your self? Yes labels help you figure out who you are but they also change all the time. Why does it matter who you like? You fall in love with a person after all
September 5th, 2016 12:11pm
Only you can know. However, lesbians are only attracted to women, while bisexual people are attracted to both men and women.
October 25th, 2016 1:36am
With time and exploring yourself, make experiences, explore, try something and if you don't like it or you don't feel sure about it then there's the answer. Don't be afraid of explore your tastes.
June 10th, 2019 4:40pm
Just think if you the fact of spending the rest of your life with a boy or a girl doesn’t make a big difference then you’re bi ! Or if you don’t feel comfortable being in couple with a boy or you didn’t enjoy sex with him and you did enjoy it with a girl then you are a lesbian ! So if you are not sure about your sexual orientation either a lesbian or bi , you can also know it and make sure of it by testing yourself , if you can get sexually attracted by boys and girls then you are bi , if only girls attract you you are lesbian
January 21st, 2020 10:28am
I don't know how old you are so I'm going to guess you're a teen/young adult and write accordingly. You will know with time, and perhaps with experience. If you feel comfortable enough try being both with guys and girls. Maybe you'll realize that it feels different, or that one just doesn't feel right for you. The key is not to put pressure on yourself to "decide" which one you are. If you give yourself time and be patient, sooner or later you will figure it out. Also, be aware that many bisexual people have a fluid sexuality, in a sense that sometimes they might be drastically more attracted to one gender. Whatever you do don't let anyone force you into labeling yourself. The right person will give you space to go at your own pace. :)