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How do i know if im a lesbian?

6 Answers
Last Updated: 07/06/2020 at 8:51am
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Johanna Liasides, MSc


I work with youth and young adults to help them improve depressive symptoms and self-esteem as well as effectively address family, relationship and peer conflicts.

Top Rated Answers
March 30th, 2018 10:31am
Ask yourself this - Who do you find attractive? Do you find males attractive? Females? Both? Neither? It can take a while to find your true identity, and your sexual orientation is not solely based on who you find attractive, although it can help. The key to finding your identity is patience. If you like girls, then that’s who you like. If you like boys, then that’s who you like. If you like both girls and boys, then that’s who you like. Also, you should know that you don’t necessarily need to label yourself with an identity. All that matters is that you’re happy and safe :)
March 27th, 2018 12:24pm
well maybe you've tried having a boyfriend and you just dont click. Or maybe you've grown up in a few years and have looked at girls the way girls look at guys.
June 12th, 2018 11:02pm
Hello. This is a tricky question to consider because the truth is that there is really no definite answer. It's something that comes from within, and something you have all the time in the world to figure out. Some people know right from the start, others don't know until they're old and grey. Just remember that it's okay to be unsure whether or not you're a lesbian, or if you're something else entirely, just take your time and you'll figure it out along the way. Good luck :)
June 20th, 2018 6:30pm
It's simply your attraction to that gender. Do you feel it is more sensual it more playful?
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
August 12th, 2019 9:41am
If you feel attracted to women and not to men, you are a lesbian. You can try to imagine yourself with men and with women in sexual and romantic contexts, and see how that makes you feel, what is your physical and emotional reaction to those fantasies. If only the women scenario makes you feel good and you desire it, you are a lesbian!
July 6th, 2020 8:51am
Hello! Asking yourself such a question is perfectly normal, but it can be quite confusing and difficult to go through uncertainty and questioning. Being a lesbian comes in many different forms, a little bit like being a girl is different for everyone. Personally, I realized I was into girls because I wanted to have a relationship with them. It feels like you're pulled by the other person. You want to talk to them, ask them about their life and what they are thinking. I really wanted to spend time with them and get to know them. It felt intimate, but more intimate and raw than with friends. It made me quite anxious and I was more worried about I was perceived than I was with friends. Also, I was attracted to them. I liked looking at them and found them beautiful. I wanted to hold them when they cried, hold their hand, kiss them, etc. Attraction can come in many different forms depending on your preferred love languages! So, you might feel different around other girls. Good luck!