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How do you know if your bisexual?

299 Answers
Last Updated: 08/02/2020 at 3:48am
How do you know if your bisexual?
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Top Rated Answers
October 11th, 2018 2:02pm
I knew that I was bisexual when I was about 8 years old. I never imagined coming home to my parents house with a boyfriend, always with a girlfriend. I knew that I didn't find males or females either less attractive than the other. I was about 12 or 13 when I had my first real kiss and it was with a girl my age. I've always known that I felt attraction for a person as who they are not as whatever gender they are. So basically it's if you start feeling equally towards males and females. Sometimes it is hard to tell though unless you, honestly, actually spend time around everyone to see where you are most comfortable.
October 13th, 2018 5:38am
There is no definite way to know that you are bisexual but in my personal experience, you know when you experience attraction towards both someone of your own gender and someone of the opposite gender. For me, I realized when I started feeling attracted towards a girl I knew. Initially, I thought that it was just affection towards a friend becuase I would get excited to see her and want to talk to her all the time but after analyzing my feeling I realized I felt more than friendship. I wanted to walk around holding her hand, hug her, and make her smile. I wanted to know what her lips felt like against mine. I wanted to know what kinds of restaurants and foods she liked. I was deeply attracted.
November 22nd, 2018 11:25am
That's a great question. The simple answer is that if you are attracted to both women and men, then you are bisexual. Of course it's not that simple. I think there are different levels of attraction which can change over time. I'm bi and I've been married to a woman for years. I have an emotional and romantic attachment to my wife that has fluctuated from intense to waning over the years. I also have a physical attraction to men which has been anywhere from 0 - 10. So to answer the question, I think our sexuality is fluid. At least that's been my experience.
December 1st, 2018 1:12am
If you're attracted to both sexes and not just one or the other. You may prefer one over the other, or only have past experience (e.g., dating and sexual encounters) with one and not the other, but you can still be bisexual if you get attracted to both sexes. Sometimes, it can be hard to know. Sometimes, you might wonder for a while and are not sure of it. It can take an "awakening" experience for you to realize it. Accepting it can also take some time as you might not want to be at first. But there's nothing wrong with being bisexual.
December 20th, 2018 5:28pm
It's different for everyone. Some people feel drawn to both guys and girls, some people realize after having celebrity crushes, and others realize after they've kissed a boy or a girl or had a crush on a boy or a girl before. It's kind of a process, where it might be a while until you realize it, and it might help talking to other people who are bisexual and getting their stories of how they knew to help you figure out if you are or not. Whichever your case is, it's a process and a journey wrapped up all into one.
January 3rd, 2019 2:39am
Bisexuality can be a scale. Not just on or off. It can extend from mostly liking same sex and only a little opposite sex to mostly like opposite sex and only a little same sex. Don't be afraid to scale your feelings and then change that as time goes by. Curiosity is a scale slider for sure. You can have feelings of bisexuality then explore them and lose interest. Or you can explore them and realize you desire same sex type life. You don't really know until you start to explore. The important part is to be honest with those around you and yourself. Don't push yourself one way or the other and don't limit yourself by people who have expectations of you only one way or the other. To bravely explore is to know what you are dealing with but to stand still is to only experience what you already have.
January 3rd, 2019 4:25am
A bisexual person can feel sexual or romantic attraction to two genders. You don’t have to feel equal attraction to both, it could be as much as you like, it’s up to you what percentage you like of one gender and what percentage of the other. It doesn’t matter if you’ve only been in a same sex or heterosexual relationship before, if you feel that you are bisexual, then that’s what you are. Remember that you can change this anytime! You might realize one day that you don’t really feel an attraction to a specific gender and that’s okay. You are always growing and there’s no race to figure out who you are
January 16th, 2019 4:59pm
Bisexuality is attraction to both men and women. Usually people find out that they are bisexual by developing crushes on both males and females. If you can be attracted to both men and women sexually, physically, and emotionally, you are most likely bisexual. Do not feel pressure to label yourself though, you can take as much time as you need to find out who you are, and you do not need to care about labels, if you do not want to. It can be easier to label yourself to prevent explaining yourself further, but it is not always necessary.
January 18th, 2019 8:00am
To put it simply- you must be attracted sexually/romantically to both members of the same sex and the opposite sex. When you experience attractive members of either sex, how do you feel about them? Could you see yourself potentially sleeping with this person? Perhaps dating them? Committing to them? I always know I liked the opposite sex, but I was always hesitant to even compliment pretty girls. It made me very shy and uncomfortable and I couldn't figure out why. Sometimes they would jokingly kiss or grab each other and I never liked to play like that because of the way it would make me feel- it wasn't just a game to me and I knew it was for them.
January 19th, 2019 8:05am
I think that as a bisexual, it's something you just know. I don't know how old you are, and I'm sorry if this is wrong, but I'm going to assume you're young. You're young and you're still developing. You might think that you like both girls and guys and that might be true but it might not be. I think you should experiment, see what you like. Mix it up. Chances are you might just be straight but willing to try anything. I'm bisexual and when I was younger I thought it was just a phase but now that I'm older i realize that it was something I just knew all along in the back of my mind. I just think you shouldn't assume something if you're not completely sure yet. I don't know if this helps, but if you want to go more in depth, please talk to me.
January 20th, 2019 7:44am
I to am Bisexual I didn't truly know until I was about 15 although I knew before that I wasn't straight. I think often its something when you just know. I knew I liked girls mostly but then I also knew I wouldn't rule out a straight relationship so thats how I knew I was Bi. I think often theses things out them self out its a really confusing time when you are questioning your sexuality and I think sometimes it can feel very difficult but it ultimately doesnt how much time it takes to work things out and there will always be support some where and remember we are always here if you need us.
February 10th, 2019 10:57pm
Ultimately, there's no way to answer this because it's a personal connection you have to make for yourself. It's absolutely normal to be be bi-curious, or even bi-flexible, but don't put limitations on yourself to exploring exactly who you are. Bisexuality is a wonderful thing, and although the gay community can seem a little judgmental, just remember that what is important is YOUR journey, not their perspective. If you feel the inclination, explore. If you don't want to, you don't have to. Just enjoy your time and space understanding and appreciating yourself. Remember that going with the 7cups theme, you cannot pour with an empty cup - so take time for yourself too. :)
February 13th, 2019 10:58pm
Personally, when I was younger (about 12) I thought I was bi, and then in middle school I thought i was a lesbian, but now I know i’m nonbinary and bi. There are a lot of factors that go into attraction, so if you see yourself being happy and married to any gender, if you see yourself dating/haveing a romantic relationship with someone of any gender, then you are likely bi. Of course there’s internal struggles that may affect those feelings (trauma, dysphoria, internalized misogyny, etc.) but if you change your mind and realize that you are not bi, that’s okay, you deserve to be happy either way!
March 3rd, 2019 11:33am
I am bisexual, i become aware of my sexuality with acknowledging my attraction toward man and woman. I equally love both man and woman. I would advice finding stronger advocates online and read their stories and read on bisexuality. I went through a self-discovery phase of gathering and finally letting go of the denial. I had to have a greater understanding of the sexuality to be able to have a sense of belonging to the community. The old saying of 'knowledge is power' can be true with this sense especially in our modern times of being virtual connected at our fingertips. I will end with just be honest with yourself. youmatter.
March 16th, 2019 8:36am
Labels are a way for humans to cope with the unknown, but they should never define our whole being. That said, bisexuality could be defined as a physical or romantic attraction to either gender. It is kind of a broad term. A person can have a preference for one gender over another, but that still falls under bisexual. This can be a sexual attraction, but I believe that someone can be asexual and bisexual. What I mean is it can include a desire to build a bond, with either gender, that goes beyond friendship or familial love. At least that is my take.
March 30th, 2019 8:30pm
Bisexuality is very common! Sometimes people of one gender can be attracted to boys and girls. Sometimes for people it doesnt matter the genitalia, it just matters the personality. If you think you might like both you very possibly could. A lot of people figure it out early on, but a lot of people also take years to actually figure out what exactly they like in a person. That could be a male or a female! Only you really know how you're feeling on the inside! Trust your gut feelings! Love is love and know that you are not alone!
April 7th, 2019 12:54pm
First of all, a bisexual DOES NOT have to be someone who is attracted to men and women equally, or even just men and women. In general, the label bisexual describes someone attracted to more than one gender, and people outside of their gender. So, if you find yourself getting a non-platonic attraction to multiple genders, it is likely you are bisexual or pansexual. Hope that helps. Remember, even if the people in your outside life don't accept this, and it would be unsafe for you to come out, there is a huge community online of like-minded people and allies who will support and love you no matter what.
April 13th, 2019 1:18pm
Sexuality is about experimenting and getting to know yourself. Don't feel to label yourself straight away, just reflect and consider the people you could like and be attracted to. Don't try to confine or force yourself into a box, just like whoever you like, date whoever you want to date, and from that eventually with growth and discovering more about yourself you may find a label that fits well. If you find yourself being attracted to people regardless of gender, then you may well find that bisexual is a label you're comfortable with and fits you, and that's completely okay
May 1st, 2019 3:00pm
The most importatnt thing is to remember that you don't need to label yourself or figure it out immediately. On the other hand it is understandable that you want to be sure. A good sign that you are bi is that you tend to focus on the same gender. For example, if you find yourself looking more at the same-gender-as-you person in a couple on a street, that may be a sign! Or yes, even if you are watching porn. But of course, we are talking about bisexuality, which means being attracted to both girls and boys. And how do you know, when you're not sure if your crushes mean either homo/hetero or bi orientation? Just relax. Take your time. You really dont need to be sure if you're bi, pan, poly, homo, hetero, ace or anything else right now. If you dont know, how to respond to a question about your sexuality, why dont you just use the term queer? I personally identify as queer, and right now I dont need to know what exactly "am I".
May 11th, 2019 4:29am
well coming from a bisexual person i may be able to help. when i started questioning if i was bisexual i started noticing i had small crushes on my friends of the same gender, like wanting to hug them constantly, always wanting to be close to them, or simply just wanting to be their partner. i always knew i like opposite gender so that was never a problem for me. you really just have to dig down and think. would i date the same gender? am i attracted to them? do i see a few with them? it may take a while to figure out but i hope this helps you in even a small way❤️
June 6th, 2019 3:38am
I find that it is something i realized slowly, as I began to come to terms with the fact that my feelings for other girls was the same as mine for boys. However, if you think you are you probably are. It really is a personal decision to identify as that, and you can choose for yourself how you want to identify, and if bisexual is the word you want to use then by all means go for it. Good luck on figuring these things out and finding your identity! This is a journey that I am excited for you to be able to take.
June 6th, 2019 6:49am
Being bisexual means attraction to two or more genders, if you think that you are or have experienced that than that may be an indication that you are bisexual. You do not need to of had an experience with someone of the same or different gender (or any gender) to know if you are bisexual. If you are questioning and think that you may be bi then you might be. But it’s up to you to determine your sexuality, nobody else can tell you how you identify yourself and who you feel attracted to inside. I hope that this helped you.
June 6th, 2019 1:30pm
You know if you’re bisexual if you feel a sexual attraction to two or more genders(without it being all genders). It can be male/female, male/non-binary, female/non-binary, or any other combination of genders. If you still feel an attraction to two or more genders without it being all genders but it isn’t a sexual attraction, you could be biromantic, which is romantic attraction to two or more genders. If the attraction you do feel is to all genders, depending on whether gender matters or not to you, you would either be pansexual/panromantic (all genders, gender matters) or omnisexual/omniromantic (all genders, gender doesn’t matter)l
June 7th, 2019 1:30pm
I usually get attractions towards both sexes. But it's not like it is 50-50 but it may be 70-20 or even 20-70 sometimes. I got my first crush in class 8 and she was of same sex as mine. Literally faced a lot of bullying after that. I searched the net about being a lesbian but I realised that I can't rule out my attractions towards opposite sex. So I decided I am bisexual. Being a bisexual can be confusing sometimes. So, if you want to know if you are bisexual, just consider your as gay if you are a boy and lesbian if you are a girl. Next observe how would you feel if you dated a person from opposite gender. If your attractions are romantic and sexual, you are most probably bisexual. Be free to explore other areas such as "heterosexual homoromantic" etc. That belongs to queer category.
June 12th, 2019 3:49am
To find out your sexuality you have to experiment with all kinds of people. You will probably find a group of people you like mentally and sexually. Or you might like all people no matter what gender or sexuality, that is ok too. In order to know who you are interested in, you have to experiment and test the waters. Even though it might be stressful at first, but you will have a conclusion in the long run. Remember that if this comes to much to handle, you can always come to 7 cups to vent. It can be helpful to just be able to talk to someone sometimes.
July 26th, 2019 1:24pm
If you feel confident and attracted to both genders with no shame! This is the way I feel however I have not explored same-gender yet but when my girlfriend asked if I would consider I said yes! And if you think about it it gives you more variety and there's nothing wrong with it! My girlfriend and I are both bicurious and proud of it.. in fact when we talk about it with other like-minded people we find it very very interesting an exciting with no shame I believe that those are the signs and if you give it a try and like it you are bisexual but you do not have to label yourself if you do not desire!
August 15th, 2019 5:49pm
For me personally I knew that I was bisexual before I knew that bisexuality exists. It was around primary school age when I got my first sexual fantasies and they were all with women so bisexuality is nothing you decide you could try out at some point. I was very confused about it, specially since my romantic interest back then was only towards men. I couldn't imagine to marry a woman for example. Nowadays I can imagine both with each gender. Back then I knew about heterosexuality and homosexuality and I didn't know if I was lesbian or "normal" so I thought you cannot like both and I would have to decide. At 13 I first heard of bisexuality and I was relieved that it actually exists and I'm not crazy or something. So I can't tell if it's the same for everyone but I noticed it by my fantasies and looking into my romantic and sexual interest. It's nothing you can really control you can only decide if you live it out or not.
October 25th, 2019 4:28pm
Well, if you feel attraction towards women and men you would be classified as bisexual. I know this out of own experience. You also need to think about who want to be with, and who you feel attracted too. It may be that you feel shy around them, or aroused, and if you are bisexual you would feel this around men and women. I know this because I used to have a crush on a guy, but after that I got a girlfriend. Its also based on who you want to have sex with, in the future.
October 27th, 2019 8:34pm
If you feel that you are sympathetic to a person of your gender - this is normal. If you feel that you suddenly liked a person of the opposite sex when you thought you were gay or lesbian, that’s normal. Nobody deserves oppression because of love and their feelings. This is not a crime or a manifestation of something immoral. You should not be shy about yourself or your emotions, because experiencing love, mutual respect, sympathy, trust is a normal occurrence. Today's society can make you feel worthless, but nothing compares to accepting yourself like that. Good luck, darling.
November 7th, 2019 8:05am
You're eligible to identify as bisexual if you experience sexual attraction to people of more than one gender identity. Men and women in equal proportion? Great. Occasionally men but mostly women? Great. Men and nonbinary people? Great. Agender people and gender fluid people? Great. It all makes you completely and totally eligible to claim a bisexual identity. Now why don't I say that it makes you bisexual? Because there are so many different words to describe sexual orientations, especially those that are open to people of more than one gender identity. The words you choose to describe your sexual orientation are your choice. So that's why I think of it as a two step thing. Step 1, are you eligible? Step 2, does that word feel right to you?