I know I’m bi but I can’t accept it fully. I don’t judge the LGBTQ+ community as long as they are being fair. I can’t help but think I must be wrong so I push my feelings aside. How do I accept this?
2 Answers
Last Updated: 07/20/2021 at 11:20pm
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Lisa Groesz, PhD
Psychologist
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Many LGBT people experienced the same as you, having internalized prejudice and mentalities that prevent them from fully accepting themselves. While they rationally know there's nothing wrong with them, they can't help but having negative feelings at a deeper, less rational level. Trying to rationalize your feelings can help: any time that you have these negative thoughts, you can ask yourself what is the logic reason why you shouldn't accept yourself, what is the wrong part about it, why it should make you "worse" than other people. The more you rationally reflect on this, the more you'll start considering your feelings under a rational light, and your perception of yourself will start to change also at the emotional level. It can also be of help to get in contact with the bi community - either online or in person - to listen to their experiences, get to know them, and thus start internalizing the belief that bi people are just like everyone else, and they can have normal and happy lives like any other!
Anonymous
July 20th, 2021 11:20pm
part of the road to acceptance is to think about why you feel this way about the LGBTQ+ community, so you can look at it from a new perspective and understand your feelings better. i remember it was hard myself coming to terms with being gay as i was brought up to think it was wrong, but i also knew i couldn't deny it being true. part of how you feel is probably from your primary/secondary socialisation and likely also what you have read in the media or watched on tv, but it is up to you to think back to why you feel this way.
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