I think that I am bisexual, but i have never had a crush on a girl. How should I think about my sexuality?
Last Updated: 06/01/2020 at 10:14pm
Katherine Aucoin, Transpersonal Counselling Psychology
I offer you compassion and support on your unique journey. I look forward to working with you to heal your emotional wounds to find more freedom and joy.
Top Rated Answers
People can know they're bisexual even if they never had a crush on someone of the same gender. Your sexuality is not about the experience you've had, it's about who you find attractive. If you believe boys and girls are attractive, and you think you could have feelings for both, that is enough for you to call yourself bisexual!
You are the expert on yourself: If you think you are bisexual then no one should tell you otherwise! You are free to explore your sexuality and get to know yourself better.
Don't stress about it - the answer will come to you, sooner or later. You don't have to necessarily choose if you're bisexual or not - your life will show you. Just be open to date anyone you like, there's nothing wrong with being unsure.
The great thing about being bisexual is that you can experiment. You can also be sexually attracted to a person but not emotionally attracted to them, like you wouldn’t want to date but you wouldn’t mind having sex with them either. Sexuality is something you have to experiment with, in my opinion it’s very complex and you have to find what works for you. Eventually, everyone does, whether at a young age or when they are older! I wouldn’t stress about it. As a bisexual transmale, I discovered that I was bisexual by dating males when I was female, and then when I transitioned into a male I began dating both females and males when I was more comfortable with the idea of doing so. I’m not as attracted to females as I am males, but it’s different for everyone. Keep discovering yourself in spontaneous ways!
First, try to be kind and patient with yourself. Know that whoever you love isn't a choice, and you have a long time to figure it out. If you want a word or a label for your sexuality, try some out and see if they fir. You can try talking to people in the LGBTQ+ community about their experiences, and it's a wonderful and welcoming community for the most part. If you don't feel the need for a label, that's okay too. Many people don't like labels, and just date people they're attracted to regardless of gender or sex. Remember, there are no rules or timelines.
I think finding out your sexual preference is to figure it with yourself. Do you have feelings for girls? Are you attractted to girls both physically and emotionally?. Also experiencing it might will help it be clearer.
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