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Im so confused, i like girls and i like to do girly things, but im a boy. What am i?

15 Answers
Last Updated: 06/21/2021 at 8:57pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
Greece
Moderated by

Johanna Liasides, MSc, PhDc

Psychologist

I work with youth and young adults to help them improve depressive symptoms and self-esteem as well as effectively address family, relationship and peer conflicts.

Top Rated Answers
PandoraPlusMinus
February 28th, 2018 11:37am
Hey, I hope whoever posted that reads this. I need a few more details on your life to be sure, but I'm 90% certain that I know how you feel. For a few years now I've suffered from this sort of confusion, finally after doing lots of extensive research I was able to understand that I could be categorised as a Lesbian Identified Man (LIM). This means that I am assigned male at birth, but I feel I should be female. I identify as a transgender woman who is romantically and sexuallay interested in girls. I am still in the closet as personally I think I will cause a lot of hurt to those closer to me if I did come out and I'd rather it just be me hurting. If you read this and think you feel similarly please, please get in contact with me
dearlybeloved
January 15th, 2018 12:14am
You’re a human being. Don’t get so caught up in trying to define yourself; it can be really exhausting. Just live life!
Anonymous
January 8th, 2018 11:50pm
You can most definitely be a boy who likes to do girly things. That's definitely allowed. However, if you're wondering if you could be transgender, I would do some research on different gender identities. Maybe something in the nonbinary spectrum will resonate with you. Or maybe you'll decide you're actually a girl who likes girls. Or perhaps you'll just be a boy who likes traditionally feminine things. All are valid options and, but, in the end, only you can actually make the decision about your gender identity. Best of luck. Come visit us in the LGBTQ+ subcommunity if you want to talk more.
Aayla
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
July 8th, 2019 10:30am
If you identify as a boy and you like girls, it means you're an heterosexual boy. Enjoying "girly" things doesn't necessarily mean anything, some cultures assign the "girly" label to some things, but it's only a cultural matter, not a natural one. If you identify as a boy, you're a boy, whatever you like to do.
NavTheCarer
February 12th, 2018 6:10pm
Characteristics of people are not based solely on their gender. In my experience, it is just as common to find a girl who is cisgender and like things that are commonly seen as masculine. Your interests do not define who you are. If you decide you are something else, then that is up to you, and not based on your likes and dislikes.
TaranWanderer
January 12th, 2018 10:32pm
Well, it's all up to you really. If you're confident in your gender as a boy, and your attraction to girls, there's absolutely nothing wrong with saying you're just a heterosexual male, because really guys can like to do anything, even traditionally 'girly' things! It doesn't make anyone any less of a boy. But, if you're feeling like maybe you aren't a boy (or, at least not comfortable calling yourself one), there's a lot of identities out there to explore :)
carlyolivia
February 20th, 2018 9:21pm
You are whoever you choose to be. The things that you like and choose to do do not define "what" or who you really are. Live life to the fullest, and be yourself.
Sintix
April 10th, 2018 1:39pm
Why put a label to it? You're simply a boy who likes girly things. Just like a girl can like boy things without anything changing... It's totally okay.
treeHugger7
February 4th, 2020 11:29pm
You can be an effeminate male. That's okay. A lot of people presume that liking girly things means you're gay or trans. But that's simply not true. What you enjoy has simply nothing whatsoever to do with your sexual/gender identity. You might be a trans guy and like girly things. It's okay. People wouldn't bat an eye at a girl wearing pants or playing with cars, but when a guy does the opposite it's suddenly the most taboo thing. This should not be the case. It's not fair that just because people tell you that something for girls, it makes it so you get confused to like it.
FromDrewWithLove
February 26th, 2018 5:08am
Well, I can't define anything for you (as your identity is yours alone), but there are a few different things here. Most likely, you're still a boy, you just have feminine tendencies. Not conforming to gender roles and stereotypes doesn't necessarily mean you aren't cis/het. Also, your gender expression doesn't change your gender or who you fall in love with; liking feminine things doesn't mean you're not cis/het. However, it is possible that you aren't cis/het. Again, you're most likely just a feminine boy, but I also cannot define your identity for you.
AzureWinter
February 13th, 2018 6:58am
Gender can be confusing. I'm cisgender, so I may not be able to help as much as some others, however I do have information from friends who have gone through things similar. The most important thing is, gender is confusing and not always as easy to discover as you might think. You can like to do girly things and still be a boy. Things that are "girly" are just stereotyped anyway, so don't worry too much about that. Mostly, it's just how you feel. Do you feel like a boy? Because then you are. Your gender might fluctuate, you might change or find different identities that suit you throughout your life. Remember, sex is different to gender. I recommend doing some research of your own so you can get an intricate understanding. You'll work it out. Best of luck!
Alexander080
February 18th, 2020 10:02pm
you are who ever you want to be as you don't have to label yourself as anything just do what you want to do that makes you happy. There are lodes of people that are guys that do girly things and girls that do guys stuff. Whatever makes you happy is the main way around it. If you do things that make you comfortable then just keep sticking to that as that is what you want too do and that is what makes you, you. if you don't feel yourself then you aren't going to be happy and you aren't being the best person for yourself
VelvetDreams29
September 7th, 2020 6:51am
You are a human being. That's what you are. Although you might feel confused right now, you should feel proud that you accepted and acknowledged your orientation and choices. Your sex is something that you are born with, but your gender is something that you choose. What matters most is being happy with the person you are. Understanding your preferences and working towards them will help you develop your own identity and character. This will in turn help you to build your self-confidence. The happier you are with the person you turn out to be, the more you'll be able to succeed in life and help the people around you.
Ldcty999
February 15th, 2021 1:26am
There is nothing wrong with liking traditionally girly things if you are a boy. You are totally normal. Societal norms are being broke every day of every month of every year and it's people like you who are able to really like something because it makes them happy and not because of what others think that make it entirely possible, enjoy what you want as long as you aren't hurting anyone else. As for liking girls, awesome. It doesn't matter either way :) Your happiness is all that matters and all that you should concentrate on. Just be happy :)
Anonymous
June 21st, 2021 8:57pm
Hey there! Who you are is an extremely difficult question that one has to answer throughout their lives. However if you like girls and like to do girly things then let no one stop you from doing so. Be yourself always and do what you want to do. I understand you are confused but you have the answer to this as well. Just think about who you wanna be and be unapologetically yourself because You are YOU and no one can change that. To quote Taylor Swift, "I'm the only one of me. Baby that's the fun of me!" Hope this helps! Have a great day /night!