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Is it normal to have been really sure that you're trans, but then later feel more confused and unsure?

7 Answers
Last Updated: 09/30/2019 at 1:13am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United Kingdom
Moderated by

Halayma Khatun, M.A Theology(U.K, UAE), Diploma With Distinction in Counseling, Certification trauma abandonment


Compassionate, patient, experienced depression counselor. I use Psychodynamic counseling techniques. My counseling experience is +8 years, I counsel women.

Top Rated Answers
August 18th, 2017 1:55am
Of course it is normal! Step back. Stop. And think over what is going on right now. Try to explain to yourself why you're feeling this and what is challenging these thoughts.
August 19th, 2017 6:46pm
It's normal. Some days it might not feel as clean-cut as others on your gender identity, and that's okay. What's important is that you are able to work through those thoughts to find your true feelings.
September 11th, 2017 3:47pm
It's absolutely normal. Gender is a fluid concept and can easily change for you over the years. It's okay if you're not certain about it right now; you have a long time to figure everything out. Best of luck. :)
October 28th, 2017 2:23pm
Identity is a tricky thing. Sometimes the stuff you've been 100% sure of doesn't seem that way. Many things may cause this. Your brain develops lots till 25-30 yo, and teens especially face confusion, uncertainty etc. It can be temporary in nature and then you're back to "normal" (here it'd be knowing you're trans), or perhaps you're figuring out something new about yourself. Both are ok situations, so embrace your insecurities.
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
September 30th, 2019 1:13am
It's totally possible. We live in a big confusing world, and it's ok to start having contrasting feelings and thoughts. It doesn't necessarily mean you aren't trans, maybe it's simply harder for you to acknowledge under certain circumstances. Society often tries to make us doubt ourselves. It can help you to try to get in contact with the trans community and share toughts and experiences with them. Everyone has a unique path, but comparing yours with others may help. And of course, it helps a lot to seek support, particularly with qualified therapists who are great at helping people understand themselves better.
July 23rd, 2018 7:43pm
Yes, whether you are trans or not. What you are considering is extreme. I mean your considering changing practically everything about yourself. Despite whether this change is right for you or not it's still a life changing event and I think it is normal to reconsider or second guess your decision for something so major.
September 18th, 2018 5:08am
Yes! Questioning is completely normal and will happen through your journey. Sometimes you will feel like you're faking it, and sometimes you will feel like maybe it wasn't the exact label for you, and that is completely normal! And it almost always passes. Sometimes the best you can do is take a deep breath in and talk to yourself as if you were a good friend going through the same problem. It's ok to want to avoid the confusion, but talking to someone and acknowledging it will help you. It can get somethings in line so later on, when the confusion re-emerges, you will be better equipped for it. Confusion is natural, and completely normal.