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What's the best way to tell your friends you are homosexual?

21 Answers
Last Updated: 11/02/2020 at 3:17pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Polly Letsch, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I provide non-judgmental, person-centered, objective therapeutic treatment for individuals of all ages to improve social, emotional, mental and other areas of functioning.

Top Rated Answers
January 9th, 2015 2:41am
You should just tell them outright! If they are your true friends, they will accept you no matter what your sexual preference is!
April 19th, 2015 2:55pm
If you want to come out as gay to your friends, bake them a rainbow cake, cover it in white icing, and write the word "surprise" on it.
May 7th, 2015 4:17am
It starts with telling yourself first, self-awareness and assuredness is the most powerful part of coming out - but it sounds like you've done that already so way to go! Honesty is always the best practice when coming out to other people, be prepared for different people to take the news in their own ways. Some may need time to sit on it, some may doubt you, and still others will think nothing of it and continue on as if you had told them the sky was blue. You know your friends better than any of us will, so tell them in ways that make *you* feel the most comfortable. They should know that nothing is different about you, you'll still be the person they know and love - you just happen to be attracted to the same gender and that's not any better or worse than any other sexual identity. Let them know that you're still a supportive friend and hope that they will offer that in return. Big hugs for your courage!
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
August 26th, 2019 11:41pm
You can express your feelings as openly as you can, tell them what it means to be who you are, how you realized you are homosexual. Make sure they know you want to share it with them because they are important to you, and maybe tell them that you believe in your friendship and you're sure they know that nothing changes in the person you are. You can also encourage them to ask you any questions they have about it. Don't worry, just be yourself, real friends will care for you and your happiness only, no prejudice can ruin a real and deep connection.
January 9th, 2015 6:33am
Just say it. If they are supportive they will ask questions but will never judge because they love you.
April 11th, 2015 5:54pm
Tell them directly, approach them saying you need to talk to them about something important. If they are your friends they will support you no matter what.
May 3rd, 2015 2:47pm
Just try to be honest with them, If they are good friends they will be supportive no matter what. Just make sure you are comfortable to do so.
June 12th, 2015 9:58am
Take a deep breath, be in a place where you are alone with your friends, comfortable while sitting down and looking them in the eyes to get ready to just come out and say it. You can say that you have something serious you want to tell them and that should grab their attention. Tell them that you are nervous, but that you want them to know this and then let it out.
June 23rd, 2015 10:09am
well, the best way is to first find out if your friend is okay with homosexuality or not. if he is then tell him. it will take sometime for him to adjust but it will be alright. and if your friend does not like LGBT then either stay closed or let him go because he doesn't deserve you....
December 1st, 2015 1:19am
It depends on what your friend's beliefs are. If they're accepting, tell them in person slowly and with sincerity. Something like "Yeah. I have something really, really important to tell you. I'm homosexual." And hopefully they accept you. If they aren't accepting of homosexuals, you should wait until the time that's best. Tell it to them slowly, and be brave. If they don't accept you, there are plenty of wonderful people who will support you. Don't be afraid to be who you are.
December 1st, 2015 6:55pm
The best way is how ever you'd like to and when you're ready. Don't rush it and go with the flow. If you're talking about sexualities or crushes or something, you can just mention it normally because it's part of the conversation, or make a mass chat with all your friends and tell them that way. There's no "best" way to come out.
December 21st, 2015 9:36am
first of all, make sure you are ready. You also want to make sure that when you disclose this to your friends or family that you are direct with them and do it in a setting that is going to allow them some time to take the information in. You want to present this information to them in a non-theatrical way. Avoid an "In your face" approach, you need to make sure they have time to process what you are saying. Remember, there are a lot of things they may not understand, such as why you are disclosing this to them, or the fact that you are gay. I think people like having a dramatic "Coming out" story to tell friends, but sometimes it is not what you tell people that may make things hard to accept but how you tell them, having a close heart to heart conversation with someone is going to help them process what you have disclosed to them easier than creating some dramatic event to tell them. the best way to handle this is speak to friends individually and give them some time to talk to you about this directly and create an environment that will allow for some privacy give them the ability to express their feelings about what you have shared with them.
March 7th, 2016 8:26pm
Just say it, unless you want to be creative. There's so many cool ways of coming out, just come up with something awesome and go for it
April 19th, 2016 9:52pm
Through a pun or a joke. If you can't think of any use "That person's hair is straighter than I am." Works every time.
July 18th, 2016 10:39pm
i have something to tell you all. I really hope that you're understanding. This hasn't been easy for me. I'm very nervous to tell you guys, and worrying about what you'll think. i hope you understand and accept me for who I am. A homosexual. I have learned to accept myself in ways i hope you will too. I trust you guys will not judge or make fun of me for who i am.
February 27th, 2017 9:54pm
The best way would be to probably, take them to one side and ask to talk to them in private. Say that you like the same sex and have done for however long. Ask that she supports you in your decision to come out. If you're friend is a true friend they will react with love and support, if they react hatefully then they are not a true friend.
July 18th, 2017 9:24am
Show them who you really are and don't fight them. They will see that what they think of you is true. Or you can plainly just tell them. true friends will accept you no matter what you are and fake ones will leave. sad to say. But at least you know who are real and fake,
January 23rd, 2018 9:14am
There's no other way than just opening up to them directly because if they're really your friends they would understand you and if they don't, they're not true friends and you don't need them. Just be yourself there is nothing more truer than that.
August 14th, 2018 9:15pm
Just whenever you feel comfortable. To be honest, if you don’t feel comfortable telling them, then wait. I’d just go up to a supportive friend and say hey I have to tell you something and just tell them.
November 11th, 2019 2:22pm
The best way to tell your friends you are homosexual is just to tell them. You should be able to just tell them that you are gay. They should accept that. If they are your real friends they will be there for you. If they are not then that is on them. You are important and if they cannot see that then that is one hundred percent on them. You cannot feel as if you should have stayed in the closet just because they don't accept. But you could always do something as leaving it as a hint, or you should tell them on the phone or in person. I feel like that is the most effective way.
November 2nd, 2020 3:17pm
When sexuality comes up or talk of the LGBT+ community. When they're talking about it, you can gauge their reactions and see if they would be open to discussing it further and you could share a part of your identity with them! All in all, they're your friends, so they hopefully have your best intentions at heart and would accept you for who you are. I mean, no one can choose their sexuality, so it's good to mention that point too. It's just a fact about something but it doesn't define someone. I hope this helped you out a bit!