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What's the easiest way to come out of the closet?

31 Answers
Last Updated: 07/06/2020 at 9:36am
What's the easiest way to come out of the closet?
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United States
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Top Rated Answers
November 9th, 2015 7:17pm
Start small. Tell one person who you love, care about and trust. Once you've told one person, you've done the hardest part and it'll start to feel easier for you. Gradually build up the number of people who you've told at a pace that feels right for you. Good luck!
June 17th, 2015 5:15pm
I came out of the closet in stages- first to myself, then to some people I wasn't all that close with, then my friends, and lastly, my family. Getting all the practice with people farther away in my life helped my prepare myself to tell my religious parents.
December 29th, 2014 7:29am
I don't know about the easiest way, but the way I did it worked for my family situation. My mum wasn't exactly rejecting of LGBT+ causes, but she didn't understand them at all. So for about a year, since I was fourteenish, I'd been talking to her about them and asking what she didn't understand and talking about LGBT+ people we know, and then after about eighteen months I eventually brought up the topic of dating girls (I'm a girl). I kind of just slid in "you know I'm bi right", and then moved on with whatever I was talking about. About an hour after the conversation she came back and asked if I'd actually said that and I said yep and she said okay and that was basically it.
December 24th, 2014 10:56am
It depends on what sort of communication you are comfortable with, and what sort of reaction is most likely from those you want to tell, and the relationship you have with the person you want to tell. If you are close to them, it's likely you may wish to explain more in-depth about your feelings and identity. You may do this, perhaps, by talking, writing, calling... If you are more distant from them, you may wish to say less and do it less formally. If they are likely to take it really easily, you might just mention it some time, but if you are nervous you may wish to be more formal and make sure you are safe, that you have support, that you have time to talk it through, that you have resources to offer them... It's best to come out when you both are calm, when you have time to explain a bit (as much or as little as you want), and in a place that you are safe. But how you come out - that's up to you! Hearing other's stories may give you some more specific ideas of what you want and don't want to do.
November 6th, 2014 11:45am
No one should feel they have to "come out the closet" in some formal way to let everyone know as it shouldn't matter. Just be honest with people you don't mind talking to about it if it comes up in conversation.
December 1st, 2015 7:00pm
There is no "easiest" way to come out of the closet, but there are very simple ones. Just saying it is the simplest, though it isn't always the easiest if the person coming out isn't comfortable or is insecure about it. Try not to overthink it. It's like telling someone you're favorite color. It's just a part of you.
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
August 13th, 2019 11:57am
It could help you to start by coming out with the people you trust the most, those you are closer to and/or those who expressed open-minded views and will likely support you. This way, you'll know you have a support network by your side when it comes to the hardest coming outs. It's all about openly explaining how you feel and how you realized who you are, making sure to tell them they can ask you questions about things they don't understand and discuss it openly. If you feel too nervous, you could even consider writing a coming out letter.
November 8th, 2014 12:30am
Come out when you feel the time is right. It is different for every person, some come out to the friends first then their family, depending on the person's individual circumstances. However, It gets easier after you come out, keeping your sexuality a secret is a stressful way to live. Often the people you think would be the least accepting turn out to be the most supportive.
November 7th, 2014 3:47pm
Just tell someone. Of course, only do this if they seem accepting. They may be a bit freaked, but if they disown you for it (as a friend or family), you might want to avoid them. Today's society is getting more accepting, and I hope this goes good for you :)
November 9th, 2014 4:57am
"Coming out of the closet" can be a difficult thing for some of us to do and something not all of us are always ready to do so. But something like something like coming out is something that comes to us and will happen when the time is right. The easiest way to come out though is when your ready to come out and to the right person. In doing that it will make the experience so much easier on yourself and for those you decide to tell.
March 26th, 2015 5:10am
I think this experience is different for everybody. The biggest thing is making sure you will be safe and that you're comfortable. The first step is telling someone you trust, that supports you. It is difficult at first, but the more and more secure you are the easier it becomes.
May 27th, 2015 9:32pm
You call for a family meeting in the living room and you say "Aye, lets get something straight- Im not eheheh" No, Im kidding. On a serious note first of make sure they aren't going to physically hurt you for that. If you think you will be safe you go ahead and say it. Do you know if they are against LGBT's? If they aren't they make take it as a shock but they will come around. If you need some ideas to come out you can look up some :) Hope I helped or atleast gave a giggle~
July 3rd, 2018 9:54pm
For me, the easiest way was to write a letter and leave it where my parents could find it. Take your time and think about it. There's no rush to come out.
November 11th, 2014 2:04pm
Your own way. I know, that sounds kinda cheesy, but it's true. Make sure you are in a safe environment, and tell whoever you want to tell in whatever way you want. You can kinda ask them how they feel on the subject first so you can judge their reaction, or go straight for telling them. You could just tell them one on one, as a group, you could make a cake, post on facebook, tell a joke, hire a sky writer plane, whatever you want and feel comfortable with.
September 8th, 2015 7:26am
There is no easy way. But, only come out if you know it it safe. Have a back up plan. Another place to live, and a source of income. Stay safe.
October 8th, 2015 4:59pm
The easiest way is just walking out of it. Just don't worry about what's going to happen, what'll happen will happen. Be you, and love who you want to love, and walk out of that closet whenever you're comfortable too:)
May 30th, 2017 11:44pm
It's different for everyone; my friend came out to her mum when she drove us to a pride parade (she was great about it and even marched with us), some use jokes, some have parties, some sit down and talk to their loved ones, but not everyone has people who will readily accept them (message to them; you are just as real and valid if you're hiding your gender and sexuality for your safety- we support you), start with people who will help you and will without a doubt be there for you, once your comfortable with them you can go on telling other people who you are until you have an army of support. The easiest way to come out of the closet is in your own time, in your own way, in a safe situation, knowing that somewhere people are rooting for you, your success, and your happiness.
November 8th, 2014 12:02am
I don't think that's an easy way for this. But, if the people around you are supportive and open minded, I think they'll accept it for good. But you should study them at first, what they think about homosexuality in general, and then decide to tell them or not. Or, if they are against it, especially your family, then 'd suggest you get a job first and your own place to live and then come out.
November 9th, 2014 9:40pm
I don't know your life, so I can't really tell you, because there is no singular best way to come out. Feel out your situation and trust your judgement.
November 16th, 2014 8:14pm
If you think about doing it, you should. I did, and I feel so releaved. And everytime I tell someone, even if i don't know the person, it feels like a rock i didn't know was there, flew off my chest.
January 5th, 2015 4:19pm
I was sitting on the couch with my mom, watching the telly. I was so scared to tell her that I'm gay, so I wrote it on a piece of paper, put it in the bathroom and went to bed. 15 minutes later she came into my room and said that it's all okay. Best mom ever.
May 17th, 2015 11:54pm
If there is a way someone tell me. The only way it gets easier is through experience. Though doing it over text or phone is significantly less painful
November 9th, 2015 11:20pm
Some people feel pressured to come out of the closet right away but you don't have to. You can wait until you are old enough to move out of the house in case something doesn't go the way it's planned
March 7th, 2016 10:52pm
there is no easy way, you just have to accept who you are and whoever doesn't love you like that then they're not worth it
March 14th, 2016 3:36am
There´s no easiest way. You can come out in the way you feel more confident
June 20th, 2016 1:26pm
Talk to the people you trust first and then come out with them being your supporters through it all.
August 1st, 2016 4:12am
Open and honestly. I've found that the best way to say something is to just do it. Its ultimately up to you though. You know you family and friends more than I do. Do what you deem best.
October 10th, 2016 7:15am
There is no easy way to come out of the closet, some do it with a note, others wave flags... my own personal coming out of the closet came literally two hours after I realized that I am bi. I was in the car with my friends and simply couldn't hold in my realization any longer so I just blurted out, "By the way guys, I am bi." My friends started laughing, turns out they knew I wasn't straight long before I clued in. I came out from there, my method was to randomly insert my statement of newfound sexuality into normal everyday conversation. It wasn't the best method of coming out but hey, it worked for me!
May 1st, 2018 6:36pm
That's an individual desicion. For me, it was to get good information (aside of just being attracted to certain genders or the way i feel about my gender identity), and then sit down and say it right out. If you're coming out to your friends, it might be good to come out to acertain friend who you trust a lot first, if you come out at school it might be good to talk to a teacher you trust first.
April 13th, 2020 3:29pm
First advice of all : stay safe. If there is any risks for you to come out, just think about it, prepare some backup plans just in case before doing it. Second point : you don't owe anyone a coming out. Not your friends, not your family, not your partner. If you're not ready, you're not ready, point. Third : the best way to come out probably depends on the person you want to come out to. Maybe for someone you're afraid of the reaction, who need time to think or to see all your emotions a letter would be the best. Maybe for your overly suportive grandma a talk around tea or a phone call will be enough. Maybe for your curious friends some pride items would lead the way, maybe for your family member that don't have any strong opinion on gays just introducing your partner will go well ! You know them better than anyone else