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When is the right time to come out to people?

28 Answers
Last Updated: 05/28/2019 at 8:07pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
Greece
Moderated by

Johanna Liasides, MSc, PhDc

Psychologist

I work with youth and young adults to help them improve depressive symptoms and self-esteem as well as effectively address family, relationship and peer conflicts.

Top Rated Answers
kindmusic
May 3rd, 2015 4:59pm
Whenever you feel it's the right time. You don't have to come out to everyone all at once. You care share this deeply personal part of you with whoever you want, whenever you feel ready. Only you can decide when the right time is.
RyanMegan14
July 14th, 2015 2:37am
You always come out when ever you feel ready. Make sure you are confident and happy! Always remember you are perfect and beautiful no matter what! Come out on your own time, no one can tell you when. Much love!
Anonymous
June 21st, 2016 9:05pm
For me, the key thing is to, as dumb as it sounds, come out to yourself. Accept who you are, be happy, understand yourself. From there, as long as you are happy with who you are, no-one will take it as a big deal. (excluding the extremely ignorant). Most people in your life who you would tell want you to be happy, and if that's what they see when you tell them. They are going to be happy for you :). Those who care about you (again excluding very ignorant people as they are an exception sadly), just want to see you happy, and once you are happy with your sexuality, telling them becomes just notifying of the facts. :) Don't let anyone else's view on you make you unhappy or take what you love away from you. (or who you love). :) you got this.
Rebecca
February 23rd, 2015 4:00am
You should come out whenever you feel comfortable and safe doing so! There is no specific time you should come out, it is up to you! Some people never come out, and that is a-okay. if you do choose to come out, good luck!
LovelyguentahListener
May 22nd, 2015 8:54pm
When ever you feel like it. Don't let a person or an event influence your decision. Coming out is something personal where you have to be very brave.
Anonymous
June 17th, 2015 2:38am
Normally when they are in a good mood. Happy so you don't get the the wraith of them through whatever is bothering them at the time.
DecisiveDeclan99
February 1st, 2016 11:56pm
whenever your ready, dont feel the need to blurt it out, only do it when your ready and you feel comfortable with people knowing
Anonymous
March 15th, 2016 11:37pm
Whenever you feel safe. Sometimes it'll take a long time, and that is okay. If you feel the environment is unsafe, I recommend against coming out. But before you come out to others, you need to come out to yourself. Accept your sexuality and love it.
Alonso123romero
January 14th, 2018 6:15pm
There’s no an exact time to come out. You should come out whenever you are ready and fell comfortable telling others
Adam2506
January 8th, 2018 6:29pm
The right time to come out is whenever you feel you're ready to and are comfortable doing so. (How you come out is totally your choice too btw). It's entirely up to you! This said, for the sake of your safety and happiness, I probably wouldn't advise coming out in an environment where you're likely to receive any abuse, i.e. to certain right-wing or religious groups.
Anonymous
July 11th, 2017 6:57am
When you have accepted yourself. And realise that people don't do anything because of you. Self acceptance is key. First.
Anonymous
January 4th, 2016 3:51pm
When you feel ready. When you feel like you are comfortable enough around this person and you feel that you are comfortable enough in yourself that you want to tell this person about a big important part of yourself.
TruthOnly8423
June 12th, 2017 6:18am
The right time is the time you choose. There is no "right time", it's a very personal decision! Some people will never come out and others will come out right away. There's no right or wrong here, only what you're comfortable with!
Anonymous
November 7th, 2016 2:27am
Whenever you really fully wanna live the way you truly are . you can hide things if you are ok doing it. But when it's too hard to handle you need to let it out
Anonymous
October 4th, 2016 7:52pm
When you are ready and are as confident as you are ever going to be. Coming out when both of you are in a good mood is useful too.
Anonymous
September 27th, 2016 9:03am
Whenever it feels that you are ready and that it is completely safe for you to come out. Make sure that you're coming out for yourself and not anybody else
peachiekeeen
February 26th, 2018 10:15am
When it is safe. When you are in a safe, supportive and loving environment. I cannot stress enough to be safe.
Apollonious
May 28th, 2019 8:07pm
The right time to come out to people is whenever YOU begin to feel comfortable with who you are, and are ready. There are so many things that come along with that, and it can be a scary and trying time. Just remember that even if you can’t surround yourself with support in your personal life, or if people aren’t supportive — there are people here who will listen, and give you that support. Bottom line is: That it’s all about honoring YOUR own personal feelings and heart! So the answer is whenever YOU feel ready and safe, would be the right time to come out to people.
DylanMoreland
June 28th, 2016 9:04am
Wait until you're absolutely certain of your sexuality, because it can be very hard to go back after you tell people that you're a certain sexuality. Aside from that, whenever you feel comfortable is a perfectly good time. Don't feel as though you have to come out to everyone at once. It's definitely okay to come out to one or two people at a time.
Emma16
December 11th, 2015 4:02am
The first thing is to make sure that you are safe i.e. you have a place to sleep, go, etc. if things do not go as you hope. But beyond that, I know it sounds cheesy, but come out when you feel ready. Don't feel pressure to come out before you are ready, but at the same time, don't feel pressure to stay in the closet to make others happy. Best of luck to you
DifferentJinx
December 11th, 2015 12:31am
Whenever you feel emotionally ready, to share it with that person.
ConallBranagin
December 7th, 2015 2:49pm
It is different for everyone, there is no right or wrong time specifically. I am happy to talk to you and help you create a plan and choose the safest and most positive out come you can as you can.
lizzle
November 30th, 2015 4:41am
The right time is when you feel like you can't live in secret anymore and when you know that you are safe at all times, people often fear getting kicked out or something like that, so in that case, always having a backup plan is ideal. Sometimes people just risk it though and sometimes people are happy with the results other times not so and they end up homeless if they have homophobic parents. Sometimes homophobic parent can surprise you as some people love goes further then their belief system. You should come out when you feel like it's the right time only you will know that.
Anonymous
May 17th, 2015 4:21am
Only when you feel comfortable. Otherwise you are setting yourself up for failure. And remember, you don't have to do anything you don't want to do. ♥
Anonymous
May 16th, 2015 4:24pm
i think the right time to come out to people is when they really need you and they have no one to talk to .
Anonymous
May 15th, 2015 3:22pm
When you are comfortable within yourself. When you accept yourself as who you are. Not when you're vulnerable, confused or insecure. You can't expect anyone to accept and embrace someone who doesn't feel the same about themselves.
miaesh
April 10th, 2015 7:14pm
it depends on you, whenever you feel comfortable to come out to people. it may take some time but yo decide when and how.
Klovek
February 25th, 2015 3:50pm
The right time is when you feel comfortable and safe to come out and tell people. If you don't feel both of those you should wait because it will feel much better when you do so at the right time.