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Why can't I just be "Normal"?

35 Answers
Last Updated: 05/10/2022 at 3:09pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Jessica McDaniel, LPC, LCPC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I have been practicing cognitive behavioral psychotherapy since 2007 with a diverse group of adult clients with various diagnoses, all races, and socioeconomic classes.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous - Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
March 19th, 2015 6:34pm
You already are. Society likes to push the idea that one particular subset of thoughts, behaviors, feelings, etc. is "normal," but that completely ignores a huge portion of real, living people. Though we tend to group and categorize ourselves and others to more simply understand each other, every person is unique with lives and experiences no one else can match. So how could there be one single "normal"? What's normal for me isn't normal for you, or for Oprah, or for your parents. I know this might not be a satisfying answer, especially if people ridicule you for being different, or if you have drastically different skills and interests as the people you're with the most, but in the end... the best way to be normal, is to be you. Because you are normal. You are the normalest you that has ever normaled. And one cool thing about the internet is how easily it lets people with similar normals meet each other.
Anonymous
December 13th, 2015 1:22am
You are totally normal just the way you are
Sam52399
March 9th, 2015 6:02pm
There is no definition of normal. Everyone is different in their own amazingly way. Just be you hun.
Moosey
June 2nd, 2015 6:09pm
"Normal" is a very strange word as we can distinguish two kinds of people - the ones who strive to be released from their "normalcy" and ones who desperately want to be seen as normal. If we take the nationality, religion, culture and beliefs into account we can clearly see tnat every "nprmal" is a different one. I encourage you to find your own "normal" not based on culture refferences, oppinions of other people but on what feels right for you. Staying true to yourslef makes you as "normal" as you can possibly be.
Anonymous
June 17th, 2015 10:12pm
There's no such thing. I've never met one of these elusive 'normal' people anyway. Everyone I know has their inner core of 'weird', carefully hidden behind a fragile 'normal' facade. So if you're 'not normal'... you're just like everyone else. Except you might not be able to hide it as well as they can yet.
Anonymous
September 14th, 2015 1:49pm
Because "normal" does not exist. Can anybody define or describe a normal person? What are the normal traits of a normal person? Every single person is different in their own way. Perhaps it's "normal" for everyone to have a separate personality from one another. Then sure, you're "normal." There's nothing wrong with you that makes you "abnormal."
avanef
April 17th, 2017 2:02pm
There's nothing wrong with not being "normal" and trust me, don't strive to be "perfect" or "normal", just be you. There's no one else but you and you should embrace it. If you or everyone was normal, life would be too dull, we need people who stick out, that's where our artists and creative people come from, we need people to be too out there that's where our helpers are and we need our helpers and inspiration and everything. You're only normal when you fit in with the crowd, and that's not fun. Just be you and embrace it whether you're normal or not.
CalmingSunshine08
August 7th, 2016 1:41am
The concept of normality doesn't exist. In society there is no exact definition of what normal is, but society likes to force down our throat a perceived notion of what "normal" should look like or feel like. Your identity is valid and has existed for eons in other societies, so don't feel that you should conform to an identity that will make you fit societies standards.
smileyrikki34
May 10th, 2022 3:09pm
what exactly is "normal" as on stereotypical terms i disagree, perhaps society does have its own standards and morals to what normal is but in all honestly its just how history and rights and wrongs were formed, nothing was normal until things and traits got normalized by humanities judgement and who are we to live under societies expectation that would only make us no different from everyone else, perhaps it makes us feel left out from what their experiences are like but its better to live on your own terms without hurting or relying on such foolish standard as long as you dont hurt anybody and they dont hurt you i believe not being normal to "them or anybody who says so" is perfectly fine.
bouncyKiwi10
September 26th, 2016 9:34am
Nobody is "Normal" , We are in love with the Idea of "Normal" that society shows us. Every person have their own personality and go through life changing situations that make them an individual. It's okay to be you. It's okay to be not " Normal"
MPersimmon
February 7th, 2017 7:19am
There is no such thing as "Normal". If studying statistics has thought me anything is that everything is spectrum and very few people actually fall in the middle. Most of everyone is not "Normal".
Anonymous
March 7th, 2017 12:31am
"Normal" cannot be defined. In a world full of diversity and change, there is no basis for things like normal. Everyone is different.
amiableEyes21
March 8th, 2017 3:44am
You can't be normal because, though people seem normal, none are. Even those people who seem like clones of each other feel weird and like they don't fit in. Everyone has something they feel is weird. You can't be normal because it doesn't exist, it is an illusion
Anonymous
May 8th, 2017 8:34pm
"Normal".... how is this word even defined? Trying not to judge things including yourself is a good way to start. Normal for humans is to be a human being. We all are different and we all are beautiful in our own ways.
lovingTree37
April 2nd, 2018 5:12pm
Normals a spectrum anyway even if your not the 'norm' there's still gonna be over a million people just like you, we're on a plant of over 7 billion you are never going to be the only one. Find people like you
Kayaondra02
July 23rd, 2018 6:02pm
No one is Normal in my opinion. Everyone has their flaws and imperfections. Everyone is unique. Why try to be like everyone else if there is only one you! You are unique. There is no one like you on this planet! Your not “normal” cause you weren’t born that way. We were all born diffrent for a reason ❤️❤️
Anonymous
January 1st, 2019 2:27pm
Because no-one is normal, we are all unique in our different ways. Thats what makes us human. If we were all normal, we would be the same as each other without thoughts or opinions and nothing would change for us. we would be stuck in the same routines and the same bodies. there wouldn't be new places, jobs, oppourtunities, cures, nothing! thinking of it in the way about we are all human and thus, normal would be a better way of thinking. not even identical twins would be the same as each other so wouldnt be able to fit into the category of normal.
Aayla
- Expert in LGBTQ+ Issues
June 18th, 2019 7:31pm
What does it mean to be normal? Everyone has a different answer for that. For someone, being normal has to do with being part of a majority, but the number of people that are part of a group does not determine that someone is "right" and someone is "wrong". If normal is for you a synonym of "natural", then you should remember that anything you feel is natural, any orientation or identity has scientifically proved to be perfectly natural. It's ok to be who you are, your identity is valid. Maybe you can try to work on the reasons why you don't feel comfortable about who you are. With time, analyzing your feelings will convince you that there's no rational reason why you shouldn't be ok with who you are. Also, don't be afraid to ask for support if you think it can help seeing things from another perspective. It's gonna be alright!
Anonymous
November 24th, 2020 11:43am
Normal is a relative term. In psychiatry, there are personal normal and normal in society. What is normal for society is not for the individual and vice-versa. This is not an exact science, but psychiatrists measure these levels of "being normal". For example. A child is a prodigy in painting, that is not considered normal in society but for her it is. A guy is a rapist, its normal for him, but not for the society. but when a cheerful persongets depression, it is considered as not normal for a person. There is a thin line between all odf this.
brightwave
June 7th, 2021 5:56pm
You should try and put everything you consider "normal" in a box and then take a step back. One thing anxiety does is pushing you deep inside your paranoia, your problems, your doubts, your fear, sometimes, when you are relaxed and can think clearly you realise that those problems that sometimes seem to burst your eardrums because they are so loud, are actually small things. Whatever it is the reason you don't consider yourself normal, you ask yourself if that definition of normality isn't just all the things you see in other people that makes you feel unworthy or abnormal, and if that's the case, well that is not what is "normal". It is what people show off as normal, but sometimes they, just like you, hide bigger problems behind that normality, don't use other people as a comparison to think negatively about you, because this will never bring positive things, it's a very painful exercise that does only one thing: push you down. Use yourself as a meter, if you feel ok doing something, than that's normal, all the emotions (positive and negative) that come from the possible reaction of other people, shouldn't be your concern.
Anonymous
August 2nd, 2016 3:35pm
Being normal is boring and I think most people will find it super that you're unique and different and if not then at least you know where you're standing :)
lilianj
July 4th, 2016 12:48am
Everyone is different and unique, you being different than someone else doesn't make you not normal. All that matters is that we can be happy
Probius
May 24th, 2016 7:46pm
There isn't really such a thing as "normal". Not everyone agrees on what is "normal". I think it's better to try to be the best "you" you can be, whatever that is.
Yourfairygodbro
February 15th, 2016 5:00am
Nobody is normal, it's better to just try to appreciate yourself and your quirks and differences while also trying to be moral and kind too.
lovelyRose21
December 17th, 2015 3:32am
There's no such thing as perfection as far as the human race goes , and , as a unique individual who attempts to be different from everyone else , I do quite honestly believe that no matter what individual may mock me that I am who I am , so , therefore , I don't care for typical high schoolers , and , stuff like that , to " fit in." " Follow the crowd." And ," Go with the flow." Is what some individuals may consider to may be normal since they may mock you as they mocked me personally as an individual for being different and , unique , and , I don't care about what any individual may possibly say , I am who I am , and , as far as " Normal." Goes everyone should be treated as they were made , and , that's equal , I don't care about anyone who wants to violate the civil rights , Liberties , or individual freedoms of those they may perhaps wish to alienate
mrmodonnell93
November 17th, 2015 9:34pm
for me, this question frustrates me. only because what I would consider to be normal, will be different from some one else. Define normal? - because nothing is normal, you are your own unique person, that makes you normal. normality is something that we seem to aspire for, when for me I think we all should aspire to be unique and celebrate our individualism as it likely that collectively with our uniqueness we have the power to achieve something that others around us may not. so why can't you be normal, cause A) you are already are, and B) i wouldn't want you any other way
Anonymous
November 3rd, 2015 5:27pm
There is no such thing as normal. Your differences are what make you special. They give you the ability to change the world.
SophiaListensToYou
October 26th, 2015 2:44am
"Normal" is a contradiction. The definition of normal is literally "conforming to a standard; usual, typical, or expected." Everyone is so different from each other, "normal" doesn't exist. So therefore, to answer your question, you can't be normal because it literally doesn't exist.
BeFair
September 30th, 2015 5:43pm
Up to %10 of the planet are LGBT. Call that a minority? No, it's not. That's 730,000,000 people. Is that minor to you? Don't let society define "normal". Society has failed the test on defining things. If it feels good and it's not hurting anybody, including yourself, then it's normal.
FractiousArrogance
September 30th, 2015 2:17pm
By definition, you are normal. Just because you like someone specific, that does not mean you're anything other than normal. Society likes to label anything that goes against what it believes is the best for itself. Think of a straight boy who likes to play with dolls when he is 5. Just because of how society operates, they will label him weird and such, not because it's the truth, but because it's how it wants the truth to be. Love yourself and never question whether you're normal or not because you definitely are.