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How can I deal with feelings I can't find words to express?

323 Answers
Last Updated: 08/24/2021 at 12:38pm
How can I deal with feelings I can't find words to express?
★ This question about Managing Emotions was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
1 Tip to Feel Better
Greece
Moderated by

Johanna Liasides, MSc, PhDc

Psychologist

I work with youth and young adults to help them improve depressive symptoms and self-esteem as well as effectively address family, relationship and peer conflicts.

Top Rated Answers
sophiasapientiae
November 10th, 2016 4:49am
I've found that putting all your emotions in your hobbies/passions really helps. Since I love music, belting out a song helps me level my emotions!
Anonymous
November 20th, 2016 11:31am
We don't need to name everything, sometimes feelings are confusing and overwhelming and there's no way to name them. Just feel them, and be there for yourselve.
Anonymous
December 8th, 2016 2:43pm
writing your feeling down in a poem or essay is helpful. also drawing a cartoon picture of yourself and writing words and feelings all around this is also helpful. it's a great way for you to let your feelings out, and it's also a great way for friends and family to understand how you are feeling
Galina
December 8th, 2016 7:30pm
Start with one word. If you could name that feeling in 1 word, what would that word be? Then try to use this word in a pair or words, then in a sentence. At times being able to name the scary feeling, makes this feeling less strong and brings about a degree of relief. It could be a starting point towards change.
Anonymous
December 22nd, 2016 1:22am
If you have a hard time expressing your feelings with words, try drawing! Everyone is different; some people can write out their feelings, while other take a more artsy approach (i.e., drawing, sketching, painting, etc.). See how it works!
Anonymous
January 4th, 2017 1:27am
There are many different ways to express your feelings. Sometimes there are feelings that you cannot necessarily express through your own words. Are you artistic? Athletic? Many people deal with their feelings through (healthy) exercise, artwork, dancing, music, etc. for example. In this way, you are not only acknowledging your underlying feelings but you are actively releasing any negative energy that you have pent up.
rinkuandriku
January 4th, 2017 7:31am
Find another medium to express the feeling you can't speak out. Art is a really good place to start, by simply just writing out whatever you can to describe how you feel or express the emotion in a painting or drawing. Music is also an option as well.
avanef
January 25th, 2017 3:19pm
Sometimes crying helps, or going outside and running. I do that, when my day is crazy and I don't know what to do or how to feel, I go running. I run until I feel better or all the craziness has stopped and I can think straight about the whole thing. Taking time to just not care about what is going on and centering yourself to think about it later helps.
Supergirl94
January 26th, 2017 3:01am
Let yourself feel them. I know it can be infuriating with not knowing how to express them much less put them into words for others to understand. But be honest with yourself and others, that it is okay to not know how to express what you feel but that you simply feel it. That in time you will find a way to express it or to get past this emotion that is plaguing you
BlueWin9
February 2nd, 2017 10:59am
I like to draw and write. Doing those activities really helps me express myself! Writing allows me to write my characters in the situation so I can understand my own feelings better and my drawings are like a visual representation. I find these activities really help!
BooksHugsandTea6370
February 27th, 2017 5:53pm
This is tough, I agree. One thing is to try to let yourself off the hook - like don't beat yourself up for not having the word you want. Something that could help is to write like a journal style if you like that. Something to more directly deal with these unnamed feelings could be to draw, color, markers, paint ... sometimes colors help. With paint or crayons you can mix the colors too and that may provide some clarity as to what you are feeling. Mixing provides clarity??? Yeah, I know. Maybe just try it?
Zee2002
March 4th, 2017 8:01pm
Ah, that's really hard. First off, it's really important to understand that even if you can't put words to how you're feeling, it's still really valid. In other words, what you're feeling is real, no matter what. In terms of dealing with it, I have a rather frustrating answer, it takes time, to let those feelings simmer and for you to explore them. It's hard, I'll admit that, but just give it time and try not to get frustrated with yourself.
Anonymous
March 15th, 2017 1:11pm
Find a song, write poetry, make art, do something creative, and let all of your inhibitions go for the sake of feeling good.
ingeniousPeace79
March 19th, 2017 6:49pm
Be more patient with them. There are easy feelings, small feelings, easy to spot. But there are also complex ones. Harder to spot, to shape. Time required is proportional. More time with more complex feelings. You need to be aware of the feeling, and stay with it. Listening to it. Patiently. Wait for it to express. It will. Eventually. It will use your mind to show you pictures, scenes, all kinds of stuff. And the picture will become clearer with time. And, after clarity comes, you will be at another level. Understood complex feelings gives you or makes you very rich. One way or another.
marvelousBlossom86
March 24th, 2017 6:50am
Maybe instead of expressing it through words, you can try expressing it through action (such as hugging people you love) or by expressing yourself through art (dance, music, etc,).
puppylover420
November 20th, 2017 4:31pm
Try to express it in another way. People use multitudes of ways to express their feelings and emotions. For example: Writing, Art, Music and dance. I find writing very useful for venting my own feelings. Hope i helped!
BubbleMJ
November 27th, 2017 7:26pm
Speak to a professional and use any words that come to mind to try and express how you feel. It may be difficult but they are professionally trained to understand people from a few words.
Anonymous
February 13th, 2018 11:56pm
Feelings can also be expressed by composing music or drawing pictures or dancing or other forms of art. Exercise can also help get rid of energy and consequently feelings too. Exercise causes an increase in the neurotransmitter (brain chemical) serotonin, which stabilizes mood.
Anonymous
June 26th, 2018 12:24pm
You can go with the flow and realize if it will Be a tsunami or the most relaxing ocean. If you can’t express it with words- try expressing it with feelings.
Anonymous
September 14th, 2020 10:58pm
There are many ways to express feelings without using words. Art for example: abstract or painting or water color or drawing or scribbling or whatever makes you happy. Writing music can also be another creative outlet, and sometimes even if you're not able to express feelings out loud with words writing or journaling is still something that can help. Another thing you can do is try to find the right words to express your feelings. Taking your time to sort through your emotions, identifying what's causing you to feel what and even doing some dictionary research can help you. Talking to someone else can make things more real and help find the right words
tranquilSunset12
December 8th, 2020 1:34am
Sometimes when we don't know how we feel, we can have so many emotions at the same time that it becomes complicated and confusing. Then, we can start to feel numb or block things out because we do not know how we feel or can't seem to say them out loud out of times of repressing these feelings that they become so overpowering. One way to start dealing with this is to track your emotions daily. You can download mood tracker apps, such as Rootd where it gives you options of moods you are feeling along with photos. Even if you don't know exactly how you feel, getting the closest you can every day to what you feel can help to know how you feel later in the moment. If that does not seem to work yet, journaling every day or often as you can at the end of the day to just talk about what happened can help get those thoughts out and help you sleep at night. Then, you will start to see patterns in things you say and may be able to pick out how you feel over time and be more used to expressing yourself. When people go through hardships, alot of times their ability to express thoughts into words can not work the same because of how the brain experiences difficult times. The brain in its own survival way is trying to protect you but the result is that expressing yourself can be harder to do. So simply even writing a sentence about your day can help you re-process that. Also, if you are worried about people seeing your journal, you can go on a word document, write it out to get it out and then erase when done. There are also journal apps that have passcodes that only you would know. If you have a smartphone, you can download, Diary With Password and yes it is a diary with a passcode. You can also go to, https://penzu.com/ which has your own log in which is an online diary.
Anonymous
March 9th, 2021 12:51am
I like to paint my feelings. I find that the colors represent what words cannot. Red for anger, black for death, etc. Somehow the paintbrush guides my emotions onto paper and lifts a burden off my shoulders. I also like to go outside and go for a walk. I find that the more I walk, the better I feel. The fresh air gives me a new perspective on my problems and relieves stress. Walking also helps me stretch my legs and relieve some tension that I carry in my shoulders. Very stress relieving and it is good to take a breath.
Anonymous
August 24th, 2021 12:38pm
When I can't find words to express what I'm feeling, I try to turn to something other than words to describe it instead. If you are someone who likes to draw, paint, or do any kind of arts, you could try drawing what you are feeling to try and describe it without words. You could also do it with dance if you are a dancer or have an interest in dancing. Another more commonly used technique that I usually tend to is music. Find music that match the feelings that you are feeling and it works like a charm in being able to feel at peace because the song matches what you're feeling without you having to describe the feeling yourself with your own words.