How can I stop someone from hurting me when they don't care about my feelings?
306 Answers
Last Updated: 03/26/2023 at 8:47am
★ This question about Managing Emotions was starred by a moderator on 5/12/2016.
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Top Rated Answers
When they don't care about you, then it's a pretty unhealthy relationship to be in. Are they worth being in your life?
Block them out. Trust me it is the best thing to do, you will thank yourself later
You can't control what someone else does. You can get away from them. You can also decide the impact their actions have on your life. You can make them as small as possible or channel them into something constructive
It's either you ignore them, which is the best way yet hard, or tell them and make them aware of it. Sometimes people are not aware of what they say and how it affected you. When you ignore, it becomes hard because you have to stay patient.
People are so hurtful these days. Normally when someone who doesn't care about my feelings tries to hurt them intentionally I stop and think about the situation. They don't care about me so why should what they say effect me? I usually talk to a friend if it up hurts me really bad, but I usually don't let it get to me.
practice your self to be harsh and quick in reaction of the situation ... then you must try to separate your feeling from the out side world .. take your confidence from inside make contact with your inner feeling world not from others eyes ... make your feelings is the priority not other feelings .... all this cause cognitive function is (fe) which means extroverted feeling which means you get your mood and your feelings from outer world ...carl jung theory you must make search about cognitive function .. and if u want to know yours make Myers–Briggs Type Indicator test
Depends on who they are. They an ex? Cut 'em off, They a bully? Keep telling people until someone does something. They a family member? Tell family members or friends that do care.
By caring for yourself. some people seem unable to care about the feelings of others. Sometimes they can be blamed for this but often it is a handicap for them wich they can't really help. If you care enough about yourself you will protect yourself from these people. maybe that means keeping distance, maybe this means changing your expectations of them so you don't get dissapointed. In any case I would advice you to tell these people how you feel. that way you can see if they really do not care or if they do not understand the way you feel about their actions.
Don't let them. Stand up for yourself.
This doesn't have to be physical; Just be your own advocate and stand up for your own feelings. People CANNOT hurt you if you won't let them, mentally at least. Physically if you're hurt it'll heal eventually, don't let them just bully you around.
Find a way to get out of the situation if standing up will do nothing; Escaping is not the same as being a chicken, it's protecting you, you should be your own priority.
You can start by bringing up a common thing you both share and/or like. Even though you may seem as total opposites you might find it hard to believe but everyone shares somthing with someone else. And thats how youre gonna get that person to break their first wall of coldness. With this technique you"ll easily discover something to bargain with. It might sound bad, but telling someone how would they feel if they were in your shoes or how would they feel if it was someone else taht hurt their brother/sister/someone they care about is just the answer to make them see the light.
It sounds like you need to set up better boundaries. In order to take care of yourself it's important to be clear about what you want from the friendship and be honest about how you feel.
Anonymous
June 29th, 2017 5:30pm
It can be quite hard in that situation, finding someone else to help is a great way to start off. But the best way I've found is by showing them it doesn't hurt you. I often got bullied for a disease which makes me thin, and I can't gain weight. But I let all of their comments brush past me so I could keep my head up high. Don't let them get you down, show them that their words mean nothing and that they don't have an impact on you negatively. If you show no reaction. they should get bored and stop.
Anonymous
July 21st, 2017 10:03pm
a person can only hurt you when you give them the permission to hurt you or play with your feelings. The best way to stop this from happening is to be strong, take control over your life and dont care for those who make you feel miserable.
Best is to lessen your interaction with that person. Try avoiding him/her and ask yourself as to why are you still with them if you know they are hurting you. Take out some time and sit with them. Talk to them in their face about how you feel when they hurt you knowingly or unknowingly. If they are ready to change then give them some time. Otherwise it's a sign that you should move on.
Anonymous
November 9th, 2017 7:55am
I have an experience where I had a guy friend,who was jealous of my existing economic status and he always used to compare like a perfect asshole about his problems and my problems.
He didn't care about my feelings.
He was a cheap guy of bullshit.
I stopped calling him over telephone and I cut down all the ways of communication.
Anonymous
January 25th, 2018 8:52pm
Maybe they are doing it because you've hurt their feelings before, without realizing. Or because they've been hurt by someone else. Or both. In that case you could either talk about what you've done that hurt them or ask, what's bothering them, or distance yourself if they don't want to talk.
Try to talk it out with them. Maybe go to therapy with them. If things get out of hand, call the police.
You may want to talk to them and let them know how they make you feel and how they are hurting. Then, if they continue doing the same, you may just want to stay away from them and try to still be good to them no matter what. Ignoring them and not make them feel it doesn't affects you anymore, and they would eventually stop.
If you have voiced our your feelings and emotions towards their treatment and how you feel regarding what they did to you and the person still treats you the same way, the only way to stop them is to cut them off. Life is too short to keep toxic people in it. If a person doesn't treat you right then they don't deserve to be in your life. You can't control what other people do to you, but you can control who you let in. You deserve to be happy and to let people in who makes you feel happy and good about yourself.
Realize that you're not in control of anyone else's actions, you can only control your reaction. You can imagine their hurtful words just sliding off of you. Other people's issues don't need to affect you. Just because they're feeling bad about themselves for one reason or the other, doesn't mean they can hurt you. It helps when someone says something mean or hurtful to realize that they're hurting. People really can be nasty! The best way to deal with it is: don't let it get to you! Realize that its their issue. You can be the one to control your reactions and not get upset. You can do it!
The simple answer to this is self-respect. As being a victim to this vicious cycle myself, I used to believe that people would treat me nice if I treat them well. Also, drawing boundaries and ignoring felt very disrespectful to me. So I was stuck in this circle where anyone would walk over and hurt me and I would just feel sad about it. Even though I was told to draw boundaries, I didn't know how. The simple answer to this was respecting myself enough to know that my feelings are hurt by someone's actions that arent reciprocating the way I treated them. Saying no is powerful, ignoring mean words are powerful, distancing yourself and silence are some tools you could use to keep yourself protected.
Anonymous
May 6th, 2015 4:48am
taking charge of how he can effect me ,will help.u can surrender ,or u can b strong not letting his actions or words,from harming you.
Make sure the person KNOWS you're hurting them! If they do and still aren't stopping, maybe try to get some outside help. For example, if it's your parents, there are hotlines you can call. If it's abuse within a relationship, there are also hotlines.
The thing is we can never stopped them from hurting you when they didn't even care they do. How about we alter that question a bit? How can you stop caring about people who doesn't care they hurt you? Because its more appropriate to ignore them and not care rather than stopped them.
Although it may be hard to admit, but I believe that the only way you can save yourself from getting even more hurt is to distance yourself from the person. Yes it will be difficult especially when its someone you truly care about but sometimes when we think too much about others we forget about ourselves. Being selfless doesn't mean forsaking your own health and happiness. It means putting others' needs before your own, not completely forgetting that you have your own needs too. Giving them space may make them realize things they wouldn't have if you were just around to catch them every time they fall or stumble.
Anonymous
June 19th, 2015 5:32pm
Leave them. If they don't care then they have no right to be in your life. Always remember that you deserve the best and if someone keeps on hurting you and doesn't care then they don't deserve to be near you let alone close enough to hurt you. You're amazing and you need to remember that.
If they don't care about your feelings, they will mean to hurt you.
but only you are capable of changing that; you choose to be hurt. Think about it.
Be like a wall, not a pudding. If something hits you, let it come back at them on its own. If you remain as you are as a pudding, things will go right through you.
Anonymous
June 20th, 2015 6:20pm
Hmm, now that is a tricky question to ask isn't it, this someone sounds like they wont care about how you feel even if you try to stop them?
Make it a point to release yourself from codependency and detactment. Leting go does not mean not caring for them. It is just making sure you are taking care of yourself first.
Anonymous
June 21st, 2015 11:24am
Nice option is Keep Some Distance from those People and Forget those people from your life.Then you will of yourself.
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