How do I handle my emotions when I'm in a situation that's not allowing me to use my usual coping tools?
Last Updated: 06/18/2018 at 8:20pm
Lianne Kirby, MA in Counselling Psychology
I believe everyone should have the opportunity for their voice to be heard. I use a trauma informed, person centred approach in counselling.
Top Rated Answers
Being open and honest with the people in your life about your mental illnesses makes situations like this less of a problem. It's also a good way to lose a job if the people you work with don't understand or use it to manipulate you. Be aware of how your coping tools work and practice them. Try to see if you can shorten the time it takes to use or even the physical ritual some of them require. When i first started counting down from ten to control my anger schoolyard bullies made this impossible. I couldn't count fast enough and the insults/injuries came too quickly. Practicing lifting my hands while taking one breath and then pushing down while exhaling, like bruce lee, eventually was a huge help. but it took a lot of practice to make it just as effective. Now i can just close my eyes while i imagine raising my hands and lowing them as i take a single breath and the rage monkey is back in his cage.
Try developing new coping tools.focus on the good things.your hopes,dreams,and goals.thinking positive should calm you down.
Maybe you can find a place in your mind that you reserve for this kind of situation and where you can concentrate very well, so that you might see a way out.
Coping skills can be expanded and what works best may change over time and in different situations. If I find myself in a situation that's not allowing me to use my usual coping tools I look at that situation and see if I need to add new coping tools to my arsenal. I also look at the situation to determine if it is a something that I need to not be in for the future.
Sometimes we have to become strategic when we are moving through places that aren't our usual comfort zone. Im sure you have it all together. It may seem unreachable now, but you got it!
Take a step back, tell someone you need to go some place where you can be alone for a bit - or you don't even need to tell anyone, you just listen to your body and do what's best for you. Then if somebody sees it and asks, you can explain it (if you want) later.
Make sure to take a deep breath and allow yourself to be excused from the room in order to give yourself some space and breathing room.
You can write it in your diary or book or notebook or journal of the things your going through and try to calm yourself and tell yourself everything will be under control.
I sit down and rationalize my thoughts, I then in realistic terms come to a conclusion to the best logical answer
Walk away with permission process the information think about alternatives and outcomes and step back in.
Emotion is based on cognitive perception and beliefs. usually i listen to music or eat delicious food to express my feeling but if the situation is not allow, I try to change my beliefs and pray to my religion.
I will close my eyes, sitting, standing or lying and wait for the storm to pass. Thats when the situation is so dire that I dont even care that much about anything else.
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