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How do I stop myself from falling in love?

179 Answers
Last Updated: 11/15/2021 at 6:32am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Polly Letsch, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I provide non-judgmental, person-centered, objective therapeutic treatment for individuals of all ages to improve social, emotional, mental and other areas of functioning.

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
September 8th, 2015 2:48am
I guess the better question would be, "Why don't you want to fall in love?" Granted, there are instances when it is not a good idea. If your coworker, for instance, is married, you don't want to fall in love. If there is too great of an age difference, or perhaps you are both passionate about your religion, and they differ. In those cases, I would try to avoid the person as much as possible. But, if you are talking about not falling in love, at all, you need to explore the fears behind this. You could potentially miss out on one of the most rewarding aspects of life.
Anonymous
September 10th, 2015 5:45pm
Falling in love is a natural and beautiful part of building a loving and committed relationship. It's not necessary to stop yourself from falling in love. It is different from infatuation, which may occur for unhealthy reasons. To stop yourself from pursuing unhealthy infatuations, ask yourself what it is that you are yearning for and why do you associated the object of your affection this with - you may find there are better avenues to pursue what you yearn for.
AutumnFox
September 11th, 2015 8:29am
I would create a little distance between the said person and you, keeping contact fairly friendly but not too emotional. Maybe even only messaging every second day or keep conversations fairly short like an hour at most.
autumnSabel
September 12th, 2015 1:30am
Take time to figure out your own signs of attachment; maintain personal boundaries so you do not become intimately attached to someone. Look up to others and see those people you are attracted to as mentors and teammates. It takes time to temper yourself not to act on attraction, but you can do it!
CarcinoArison16
September 13th, 2015 1:16am
unfortunately i don't think that's possible love isn't something you choose (if it was then everyone would choose) but it's just something that comes to people naturally, and it's something you just have to ride out sometimes
Anonymous
September 13th, 2015 3:52pm
I think it's almost impossible to stop yourself from falling in love because falling in love is not a choice, it's something that just happens. If you're suffering because you love someone or because you always suffer when you're in love, one thing one could do is to examine why this happens rather than trying not to fall in love. Example: imagine that you have problems to show your feelings and that affects your relationships, your partners always get tired of you and they end up dumping you. In that case, it could be a good idea to work on that problem so one doesn't suffer when falls in love. But, in a nutshell, falling in love is something that cannot be stopped.
gentleBeauty54
September 17th, 2015 3:01pm
I am not sure you really can stop yourself from falling in love! For me i can't turn love off and i don't even try anymore because it is too draining for me to try!
Pr0Pancakes
September 18th, 2015 7:44am
Falling in love is a totally natural thing to happen. Many experiences cause us to feel this way and as an impact cause our future self more than it is worth thinking about. Always give yourself, and others a chance if at an appropriate time and security in your life. If you are strongly against these feelings try to find the root and cause of these feelings and reevaluate what made you feel this way specifically and how you can prevent it in the future.
Anonymous
September 18th, 2015 9:54am
Don't - allow yourself to love and to feel, if it's meant to be it will be. No matter what you do, life will continue. Why not love every minute, person and event that makes up it.
sumansam
September 19th, 2015 3:16pm
Why'd you wanna stop falling in love? It shows that you're human and capable of that emotion. You need to embrace it.
Shrutz
September 24th, 2015 5:10pm
think about politics, career, babies, diapers and bills.okay on a serious note ,ask yourself "why do u want to stop yourself from falling in love" ?
Anonymous
September 25th, 2015 2:20pm
By Forcing your mind on something else Take the thoughts away by using that energy for doing something for others taking your mind off your own thoughts
charmingHeart
September 27th, 2015 3:45am
make busy my self by doing many positive activities, reseting our goal life, and focus to reach it. :)
Anonymous
September 29th, 2015 4:17am
To be quite frank, there isn't really any sure fire way to stop it. At it's base, love comes down simply to chemicals in the body influencing us.
Anonymous
October 22nd, 2015 6:39am
You can't, attraction is not a choice, it's innate. The expression of love, however, is not. In my experience, it is almost always appropriate to express it.
Poohwee99
October 22nd, 2015 1:25pm
I have no idea how to answer this question, because i fall for people easily. but the only thing you can do is to ensure you guys have mutual feelings for each other, to prevent yourself from getting upset/sad
Anonymous
October 22nd, 2015 7:44pm
Let your feelings go. Attraction is human, and at first it may seem as love. Rather than giving your emotion a name, let it develop, and it might turn out to be a temporary attraction. We have all had bad crushes, but we must have felt like those emotions were strong at one point. See where things go, but at first, give yourself a limit.
Anonymous
October 23rd, 2015 2:15am
Be kind to yourself in dealing with these feelings, understand that there sometimes is not logic behind why you fall for someone, as for stopping it you must always temper those feelings with a dose of realism understand why it would not be ok to fall for this person and keep those thoughts in mind, understand where these feelings come from whether rational or irrational and then properly try to express them to yourself or to another trusted friend. Allow your self to be sad for a while if need be, but to not box these emotions up rather get them out in the open and understand them for what they are, From there you can try a lot of things to change how those emotions effect you or even change the emotions themselves
Egaeus
October 24th, 2015 1:14am
You don't. The question is how you deal with what comes afterwards. Love is blind sometimes, but only you know what's best for you. Even if you feel strong infatuation with a person, it might not be the right fit for you. Listen to your heart, but don't block out your mind.
zaix
October 25th, 2015 2:52am
Falling in love is something we do without any thought really. I don't think love is stoppable, if you're supposed to develop something for someone, you're probably going to.
Anonymous
October 25th, 2015 4:43am
Analyze how the person you're falling for reacts to things and how they treat people. They can be the coolest person in the world and be however attractive you think, but if they have bad character then you can't love them.
Anonymous
October 25th, 2015 8:11am
I'm not sure there's an actual way to completely stop yourself from falling in love. However not believing in love might help.
AuntieLili
October 28th, 2015 5:31am
Well, realizing the person or any person for that matter, probably has a few or a handful of uncomely traits, that will start rearing their ugly heads after sometime into the relationship, then you might not fall in love, but go into it with more of a heads up and realistically. Falling in love (as opposed to simply loving) can get you into a relationship you may regret later on. Personally, I'd rather stand straight up in love than fall, so that I keep my senses about me, and not just be ruled by emotions and hormones.
courageousBeauty49
October 28th, 2015 1:44pm
Now if we knew the answer to this, the world would be full of MUCH less heartbreak. Falling in love is different for everyone, that is why it's so scary. Just take things slow and remind yourself that everything happens for a reason. Everything is a lesson.
blissfulWriting18
October 29th, 2015 2:56am
You cant. Love is a wonderful thing, but it sucks when your feelings arent returned. The best way to handle this is to accept you feel the way you feel and there may not be anything you can do to change this. One day you will meet the person who will share the same feelings you do.
Anonymous
October 29th, 2015 3:00am
You don't have to stop it. But if that make you heart, you have to find what that make you heart specifically
Unmei
October 29th, 2015 4:18pm
Putting up walls is a lot of pressure you are leaving on the inside. Letting your feelings happen and realizing what you want to do with them might help.
HopefulJet61
October 29th, 2015 4:21pm
This is a hard one because it's in our nature to love and to be loved! We can't help it! There is a way to put off mixed emotions that may seem like love. If you find yourself constantly falling in love it could also be just you like the person in general whenever you feel this way try understanding what's attracting you so much.
Anonymous
October 30th, 2015 12:02am
If it were me, I'd distance myself slowly from the person. I'd maybe distract myself with other things in an attempt to keep myself from falling in love.
EsaAnnMarie
October 31st, 2015 1:23am
That is something that you can never stop from happening. You just need to decide if you're going to act on the feels that develop.