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How do I stop thinking about the quarrel I had with my friend?

12 Answers
Last Updated: 07/23/2018 at 6:23pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Polly Letsch, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I provide non-judgmental, person-centered, objective therapeutic treatment for individuals of all ages to improve social, emotional, mental and other areas of functioning.

Top Rated Answers
ListeningJeff
January 23rd, 2017 3:08pm
It can be difficult to move past a quarrel with a friend because though we want to get back to a positive and enjoyable relationship with them, we still want our feelings in a given matter to be validated. At some level, we may not feel that our thoughts were appreciated or our feelings were considered, so part of us still wants some kind of resolution or closure on the matter. Part of moving past the quarrel may lie in looking outside of ourselves for a moment to consider their thoughts and feelings. We want them to do this for us, so it can't hurt to do it for them. Seeing the validity of their side might help motivate a conversation of why your side also has validity, leading to better reciprocity of respect in the friendship.
NumberEleven
July 18th, 2016 5:00pm
Perhaps you're angry or feeling fearful that you had a fall out with a friend of yours, one that clearly matters alot to you. Learning to accept that thinking about it won't change what has happened is a good way to start.
adoredIcicle46
August 1st, 2016 1:51am
I suggest simply venting to a friend and or someone on this website about it or just thinking about something else or doing your favorite hobbies or activities.
Anonymous
July 23rd, 2018 6:23pm
Resolve the issue you quarreled about with your friend. Don't run away from it, it'll only make you feel worse.
Anonymous
March 6th, 2015 6:41am
Recognize that we are all uniquely woven and therefore, we are all entitled to differences of opinion. It is for this reason that we, as humans, are so often caught up in quarrels and arguments. You may find that simply forgiving the other person AND yourself will provide a huge sense of relief.
AJourneyTowardHorizon
April 30th, 2015 8:13pm
what aspect do you think about ? it makes you feel upset and sad ? or do you feel like you one of you should apologized? or is it a quarrel over something serious or something silly ? once you identified that then you can make a decision that best suit your situation.
HeavenlyEnergy55
June 15th, 2015 10:00am
You could try talking about it with your friend. Putting your thoughts out in the open for them to know, usually makes you feel better about the situation.
Greatlistener87
November 18th, 2015 2:06am
If you hold on to the past and the small quarrels that you had together it will destroy your friendship that you guys have. Is it worth the effort holding on to it.
theuniversesdayoff
January 11th, 2016 3:03am
If you really want to get your mind off of a fight with your friend, the best thing that works for me is to engage in a hobby that I deeply love and enjoy!
Anonymous
July 11th, 2016 1:02am
Think about your favorite things to do, with or without your friend. Focus on the things that make you happy and what you enjoy doing. Your happiness is what's most important to you!
earthwalker3
March 2nd, 2015 6:15pm
Try and distract yourself. Indulge yourself with things that make you happy! Do you have any hobbies? A particular song/album that takes you away, so to speak? It's quite difficult moving on from something that you haven't resolved so I hope you manage/managed to resolve the issue :) You can message me at any time, I'd love to help! :)
PoliteOcean
September 10th, 2015 8:55pm
You can always take time to think about what happened and why. You can make a list of pros about your friend and why they are in your life. And perhaps once you see all the great qualities in front of you it will help you to see what a great friend you may have and allow you two to work on your relationship.