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How do you solve an anger attack without harming others or yourself?

22 Answers
Last Updated: 10/30/2018 at 5:12pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Elena Morales, LMHC

Licensed Professional Counselor

I believe silence creates a cycle. With empathic and collaborative therapy, we break the cycle. I help clients feel validated and supported passed anger, shame, and anxiety.

Top Rated Answers
July 4th, 2015 9:15am
1. Think twice before you speak as in the heat of the moment, it's easy to say something which eventually you would later regret. Take a few moments to rearrange your thoughts and allow others involved in the situation to do the same. 2. Once you're calm, express your anger in an assertive but non confrontational way 3. Get some exercise as it helps reduce stress that can cause you to become angry. 4. Take a timeout some "me" moments of yours can help you realize the better side of everything 5. Identify possible solutions 7. Don't hold a grudge forgiveness is a powerful tool.
November 21st, 2014 9:50am
The expression of anger is, in a word release 1-stop talking 2 -stand straight & let your arms dangle loosely Relaxing the muscles,allow the negativeness to flow through your body Focus on your breathing slowly breathing in & out imagine that you are directing any negative energy out of your body
November 22nd, 2014 11:33pm
When I get the feeling of anger coming up I a get a pillow and do one of two things...I either hit it until the feelings have passed or I cry into it. Both ways I always take time for myself after it to settle back down
March 12th, 2015 4:28am
Meditation is the best way to elevate that anger. I like to try and focus on love and letting love out into the world.
December 27th, 2016 5:31am
Try some exercises, When you’re feeling angry, doing some moderate exercise could help you. When you exercise, your body releases endorphins, which are natural "feel-good" chemicals that make you feel more positive and happy.
November 21st, 2014 4:37am
When you're really angry a good idea could be to just stop, don't move and think if it's or not to much, try to relax and think with your mind not your emotions, let you brain leader your body and thoughts. Take deep breaths and start again, don't do anything you could regret!
November 22nd, 2014 1:01am
Asking yourself questions stops the process of reacting to what you are angry about and cause you to start responding to what is in front of you. Questions like;What am I angry about? What do I need to feel happy again? are great starts to stopping the anger and controlling it.
November 24th, 2014 4:32am
There is the whole 'close your eyes, take a deep breath, and count to ten', but sometimes the anger goes overboard and it becomes too much. If you are REALLY angry with someone and want to let some frustration out, take a scrap piece of paper and a pen, and just scribble all over the paper! I feel like this somewhat works as an outlet for frustration. Good luck!
December 4th, 2014 11:51pm
Go for a run or other physical activity. Remove yourself immediately from the source of frustration. If you can be by yourself curse and yell as loud as you like, but never take it out on anyone else.
December 9th, 2014 6:34am
Try meditation, relaxing yourself, self hypnosis, taking it out on a pillow, going to the gym, listening to music, and running are good ways.
December 19th, 2014 5:22am
When I am in the moment of anger, first I try to leave the scene. I take a few breaths and say "I need a moment to calm down, but I will be back to finish talking about this in ten minutes." By explaining that I am taking a moment to calm down AND saying when I will be back to talk about the topic lets people know I do value the conversation, and I am not leaving it unresolved, but that I need a quick breather to gather myself and make our discussion effective. It can help to talk to your loved ones and friends well before hand and let them know that this is a strategy that will help you, and explain why and how it works so that when the time comes and you need to take a moment, they will be understanding and allow it. Once i am alone, I using a technique that helps me calm down like: Grounding Techniques, breathing, counting, venting briefly and then thinking of solutions, running around the block and then taking calming breaths.... what you do depends on what helps you personally, and it may take time to find what coping techniques that work for you.
December 21st, 2014 9:29am
For more immediate bouts, there is an exercise called dialing down. Rubbing your stomach and upper chest in opposite circular motions can be very grounding, for instance. In addition, breathing exercises while counting to ten are very simple examples of reinstating mindfulness. As you practice grounding exercises, identify the source of the anger, and why it has been triggered. Remember that it's all right to walk away from a triggering situation. Your well being is part of self-love.
December 25th, 2014 5:53am
There are coping skills to control emotions-healthy ways to care for yourself and at the same time keeping the people around you safe. Try finding healthy activities that calm you down.
April 11th, 2015 3:13am
Find the source of your anger and determine what ways you can avoid this from happening. This will help you to become angry less and will stop you from hurting yourself and others.
April 25th, 2015 4:17pm
There are many methods that relieve you of your anger, without you hurting people around you. Some are obvious (for example, using a punchbag), yet there are less known alternatives, like scribbling on a piece of paper until it's all black, ripping up paper into pieces as small as possible, smashing plate etc- there's always an alternative :)
May 13th, 2015 7:26am
there are a lot of things you can do to solve anger without harming others. You can punch a punching bag, scream into a pillow, dunk your face into ice cold water, distract yourself, eat something spicy etc...
May 20th, 2015 6:10am
Distract yourself with a game that is time consuming. For example, many video games have quests or missions that last 30 minutes or longer. If you can manage to distract yourself, maybe you will feel different when you finish playing the game.
September 28th, 2015 1:10am
positive thinking is the thing by which you can solve this kind of problems. be calm stay alone and start thinking about good things in life. It will help.
November 10th, 2015 8:54am
he man was suffering from feelings of inferiority and inadequacy. When such feelings take over the person's life and prevent him from functioning normally then it can be called an inferiority complex. That man suffered from inferiority complex because during his childhood he was physically weaker than the other kids at his age. Usually any kid who suffers from a certain physical defect will not develop inferiority complex unless someone makes him believe that he is different.
December 8th, 2015 9:47am
I talk to a friend about my problems, definitely makes me feel better. If they're not around, I would write it down till they are.
- Expert in Managing Emotions
March 1st, 2016 8:21am
It is good that you can give yourself the space that you need when you are having the attack. Go to a more private place to release the anger.
October 30th, 2018 5:12pm
Anger is a strong emotion that can take over and result in us doing things that we normally would not want to do. To avoid hurting yourself or someone else, distance is a very good first step. If the anger is related to a person, event or location that can be left or avoided, it may be best to take the time to leave and cool off. Then self-calming exercises like present mindfulness, deep breathing and deep muscle relaxation can be used. Knowing what works to distract you and change your focus is another really good tool/strategy. If the situation or person that triggered the anger can not immediately be avoided, breathing slowly, counting before acting and thinking before you decide to do anything can really help. Then not to make decisions when feeling out of control like this.