I'm feeling emotions I don't understand and I can't find names for them. What am I supposed to do?
Last Updated: 10/26/2021 at 9:34pm
Amanda Wiginton, LMFT
Marriage & Family Therapist
Now is the time to make a change! Professional, empathic, and compassionate therapist waiting to help you make healthy life changes.
Top Rated Answers
Not understanding your emotions is a normal and happens to everyone at some point in life. When dealing with feelings you don't understand it is important to stay open and address the source of your feelings. Are you feeling that way because of a prior experience? Is there a chance these emotions are coming up because of antipiation for a future event? Finding out the source of your emotions will bring you closer to understanding and dealing with your feelings. If things are still difficult and you are still lost in a realm of confusion, speaking with so,done you trust can also be a helpful way to gain perspective on your problems.
Emotions are far beyond words and every person experiences them differently in a way that they aren't even comparable from a person to another. Thus, do not fear them, do not fear the lack of understanding to your feelings. Cope with them and accept them as they are and then try to learn them and learn what triggers each of them and how to control them. Normally people would advice to talk to someone and let out your emotions, but I say talk to yourself.
I try to determine the cause of the emotion first. Then, analyzing the situation helps determine the feeling im having. Researching the feelings you have can also help determine the emotion. For example, I'm feeling lost. The situation: a family member has passed away. Analyzing: I find it difficult to get out of bed, resume my normal activities, and properly feed myself. Result: I may be in the early stages of depression.
Speak to someone you trust or see a counselor or therapist to help you figure out how you are feeling and why.
It's completely normal to not understand what emotions you're feeling! What's important is that you're recognizing this and asking for help. Something I always like to do to help me put a word to the feeling is figuring out what might've triggered this 'feeling.' Talking it out or just writing down the thoughts in your head might help you pinpoint things that you can say are "sad" or "angry" or any other emotion. It's gonna be okay, I know you got this!
You don't have to name them. Just write down what you are feeling and what effect does it have on your behavior and actions. Rather than trying to control those emotions, try to control the subsequent behavior and actions. If you keep doing that and do things which make you feel positive, the emotions will start getting more positive as well. As explained in Cognitive behavior therapy, negative thoughts leads to negative emotions and negative emotions lead to negative actions. And these negative actions makes us have negative thoughts. So it becomes a vicious circle which needs to be broken by controlling our actions.
That sounds like it must be a really confusing time for you! I know you said that you can't find names for these feelings but do you think you could describe them as colors? or textures? sensations? Even if you don't know what it is, your feelings are valid. Not understanding is okay too and I think it's really great that you are trying to question and better understand, that shows a lot of great curiosity and inner strength to do. I would like to ask if these emotions come at a specific time or place or you so I can better get the gist of them?
The best thing would be to see a counselor but if that is not an option try sitting down with a close friend and talking about your feelings. Talking is a very good form of therapy and it might help you in understanding your emotions.
You need to have emotional vocabulary. Lack of emotional vocabulary can really make you feel overwhelmed and also a bit lost so, I suggest looking up for emotional vocabulary charts on Google. It will help you narrow down and identify the emotions you're feeling. Try to understand the cause of the emotion and how it makes you feel, you just need to spend time with your emotions and keep observing yourself to understand your emotions, eventually you'll get hang of it and feel like you have some control over your emotions. I hope this answers your question... .. ..
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