Is it my fault that I feel so unhappy?

13 Answers
Last Updated: 05/07/2018 at 3:44am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Evelyn Coker, Masters in Social Work-LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

You have many strengths to overcome any challenge you may face. I am passionate about assisting my clients realize and develop their strengths from the inside out!

Top Rated Answers
caringSmiles20
February 9th, 2015 2:33pm
It is not your fault if you are feeling unhappy. Unhappy and happy feelings are states of mind. They keep coming and going. There are reasons like some situations or events which make us unhappy sometimes. However, that doesn't mean we are responsible for it.
Eoore
April 25th, 2015 8:18pm
Perhaps. But perhaps it's not a fault. It's an obstacle. A challenge. A learning experience. And you can overcome this, I know you can. And more; you can learn and grow from it. Even the slightest improvement is amazing, and helps towards further bettering yourself by familiarizing yourself with your emotions and the words your heart want you to say. Knowing your heart and following what is says is a very imporant step in being happier in life. And I think I speak for all the listeners on here when I say that I want to help you achieve happiness by any means neccessary.
SubtleSmile
March 21st, 2015 2:33am
Short answer? Of course not! The long answer is that finding what makes us happy is a massive struggle. Just like food and shelter, we need happiness to truly thrive. It's our responsibility to look for the things we need to live, but the world is in many ways beyond our control and comprehension. If a man is starving in a desert, it's not his fault that he is hungry. So long as you are working to find happiness, the rest is a matter of whether you have the right environment, tools, and help to acquire it.
Life705
April 17th, 2015 5:31pm
No it is not your fault. Sometimes we can't help feeling unhappy and there is nothing wrong with it and no reason to be ashamed of it or to put blame on you. Always be good and understanding with yourself, allow yourself the time you need to grief and be sad about things that cause you pain. Unhappiness cannot simply be pushed aside but needs to be felt and slowly overcome. Maybe you can also think of ways to distract yourself from your unhappy condition: I found that finding new hobbies (such as a new sport) can be a good distraction...
LightACandle
August 4th, 2015 2:19am
No. Emotions are natural human qualities. We cannot escape events that make us unhappy. However, it is our fault to REMAIN unhappy.
ThatWeasel
September 21st, 2015 11:45pm
There are many events in life that may make someone unhappy, and most of these cannot be controlled. However, you can control, to an extent, how you deal with them. You can choose to seek support and you can choose to do your best to help yourself. However faling to do these things is likely not your fault, simply that you did not have the right tools at hand.
SalParadise
November 2nd, 2015 10:38pm
does anyone actively, wish him or her self to be unhappy? in our life there are and will be many things that fail to meet our expectations, external factor that we can't posibly see coming or prevent anyhow. but as much as we don't like it, things will never go precisely according to the plan. does that mean the world is the one guilty for you feeling unhappy? id say it doesnt, but just as we have some of the blame for how we take the different things that are thrown at us, we are also influenced by family, friends, politics, economics, etc. but even if we may be going through a series of things beyond our control, it is, though, our responsibility to find our own path to happiness if we feel our life has not been going alright for us
Xserk9
May 7th, 2018 3:44am
I think it's a matter of how you do things. If you are unhappy with your life and you're still not doing anything, then it's kinda your fault that you're not ready to change your life. Of course, there are always situations in which it's not your fault but if you can do something about yourself and you know "how" you can be happy, then you have an end goal and all you need to do is figure out a way to get there.
Serenityangel1983
January 10th, 2015 7:14pm
It is not your fault when you feel unhappy. People feel sad for many reasons. I would encourage to work on developing coping skills such as reading, listening to music, talking to someone who won't judge you or belittle you, and excercising, as excercise is proven to help with depression which if the sadness persists, it could lead to depression.
PaintsGrayscaleHearts
January 17th, 2015 9:42am
It shall not be your fault to be unhappy. One can feel unhappy for many reasons other than their own. Like from other people, the surrounding, situations etc. Don't blame yourself dear
Anonymous
May 24th, 2015 2:20am
"Unless you do specific things to raise your levels of happiness and energy and positivity. You will be continually sucked down. You have to take an active role in making yourself happy. Thats why I say happiness is a choice. Because you have to choose it. You have to say "You know what, Im going to be happy today. No matter what happens. Im going to smile and im going to do things that bring me to happiness. I am going to choose not to let outside influences of the world affect my mood. You will live a happier life. " Shay Carl Butler
Anonymous
May 24th, 2015 6:16pm
Don't blame yourself for it. While it could be based on things that you do or don't do, there are a number of things that can cause unhappiness/sadness/depression. For example, there are situations in daily life, chemical or hormonal imbalances, and trauma that can lead to a person being unhappy. So don't be hard on yourself if you're not happy.
CassieThePeach
July 12th, 2016 8:43pm
It's not your fault - we can't help how we feel, especially if we're struggling or have illnesses that we're dealing with. Remind yourself that it's not you - it's your depression/social anxiety/struggles whenever you start feeling guilty. /CPeach