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Is it normal for me to bottle up my feelings and not deal with them?

30 Answers
Last Updated: 12/20/2021 at 11:17pm
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Top Rated Answers
June 10th, 2015 5:06am
Not dealing with your feelings is a way of defensive coping. Defensive coping merely masks problems, not work to fix them. Active coping mechanisms are a healthier way of combating stress and feelings head on. While we all use defensive coping mechanisms at times, using them all of the time can have negative impacts on your mental health.
August 11th, 2015 11:37pm
Everyone does it but they do it because they don't wanna bother people with their problems I am also like that.
July 14th, 2015 4:25pm
To be honest, "Normal" Is a relative word. What is normal for you, could be entirely strange to someone else, or vise-versa. So is it normal to bottle up your feelings rather than dealing with them? For some people, yes. For some, that IS how they deal. And some people I would imagine would tell you that its unhealthy to do that, and can cause more problems such as anxiety, depression along with any number of physical ailments. But is it "normal"? Well... a number of people do that very thing, but there is also a number of people who learn to deal with their problems head on. I guess it depends on your definition of normal.
February 4th, 2015 6:00am
Bottling up your feelings and ignoring is a type of 'avoidance coping'. This means we deal with our emotions by ignoring them. It is common, although there are healthier ways of dealing with some of our more unpleasant experiences. One of the dangers with bottling our emotions is that they get harder to deal with as time goes on, and little things can set off major reactions. Talking to people you trust can help a lot when you have a lot on your plate; listeners on this site are a great source to turn to.
April 9th, 2015 2:57pm
i think so, yeah. i notice that a lot of people quite often do that, me included. i think we bottle up our emotions because we think it'll be easier when actually we all know it's not. but sometimes at the moment, it gets tiring to deal with emotions especially when they're all cloudy and foggy and they all come at you all at once. we tend to dodge these emotions to avoid crying, avoid getting hurt further. it's wrong yet it feel alright. we think we handle it alright. but then you'll start feeling numb and random emotions you thought you were over with would start resurfacing out of nowhere and you'll eventually explode.
April 17th, 2015 12:38am
Yes, it's perfectly normal to bottle up feelings and not deal with them. I think a lot of us tend to do that,however it's better to come to terms/deal with our feelings than allow them to pile up. Because bottling our feelings over and over just makes things worse for us in the long run.
June 3rd, 2015 5:23pm
No, its never normal to hide your feelings. have to deal with them cause they can make you feel even worst when they finally comes out.
June 4th, 2015 1:59am
No it is not, but in my personal experience I rather take it out in a diary or through a video diary rather than share it with the wrong people.
June 30th, 2015 10:15pm
Absolutely-- though that doesn't mean that it's healthy to do so! It's much better to express your feelings and to let them out, lest they consume you from the inside out.
July 3rd, 2015 5:56am
Bottling up feelings isn't really normal to be honest. It means you grew up never being able to express or never having the opportunity of doing so. In the long run, it eats you up.. Creates more issues than the already existing one.. And eventually you blow up. It's like.. A container that you keep trying to stuff with something or the other.. And eventually it breaks.. And once it breaks.. You can definitely stick it back together, but you end up with a container that make break again.. With little pressure.., to the point that it cannot be stuck together again.. It's the same with human emotions.. Bottling up works.. Only for a while.. Then you blow out of proportions .. And sometimes.. It gets harder to fix things or handle emotions..
July 28th, 2015 11:45pm
It is normal for you to bottle up all your feeling but then you just feel guilty it's better if you talk to somebody about it even if it's just your parents they'll listen
August 17th, 2015 2:52pm
It may be normal, but it's not always a good thing. There are resources out there, like 7cups, that can help you not have to bottle up your feelings.
December 21st, 2015 1:39pm
I would not say that is "normal" but you can feel free to share those emotions with me if you like. i am always willing to listem
January 19th, 2016 11:52am
Nobody would call it normal. Why do you bottle up things. Be straight forward and don't care too much things. Dont loose your soul.
February 1st, 2016 4:00am
It certainly feels natural to want to bottle up those "too-hard-to-deal-with" feelings sometimes. I would say yes It is normal....BUT it is not okay. Feelings that have negative effects should be addressed. The problem may not be solved in an instant, but it is guaranteed to "lessen the load". There are so many reasons people use to justify bottling up our feelings; valid ones included. Sometimes you feel like if you ignore the problem it will go away...maybe there aren't people you trust enough to disclose sensitive or personal information to...maybe you you don't feel like anyone understands your situation...or perhaps you just don't think your problem is repairable. Too often have I succumbed to these "normal" feelings as well...and it is through personal experience I can advise you today to deal with these problems one at a time. And what better platform than 7cups to do so? Good luck and be blessed!
February 15th, 2016 11:24pm
It's completely normal! But perhaps not that healthy? It's easier to bottle up our feelings though than to face them, express them and let all the emotions regarding it out of that bottle. It means moving past the denial stage and really dealing with everything.. .and that might be really intimidating and scary.. a daunting task certainly! But when left to bottle up , the emotions could explode at any time .. and that mess is harder to clean up? Talking about it isn't as bad as it may seem... venting actually helps in it's own way too :) You get to let it all out and it feels as though a really heavy burden has been lifted.
May 10th, 2016 4:55pm
There are lots of Americans who bottle up feelings everyday so they don't have to deal with them. You are definitely not alone in this regard. One thing that's important to consider is how much you want to grow as a person.. There are people who live their entire lives with a low level of emotional maturity and then there are those who recognize their weaknesses (like bottling up feelings!) and work on them to try and become a better person. Whichever path you choose is up to you. : )
May 11th, 2016 5:59am
It is normal, I do that a lot. But it's not healthy though, because all of them might explode out one day and everything will just appear again.
May 12th, 2016 8:46pm
If I bottle up my feelings, I hurt. If I don't, then I hurt others. Now, everyday I'm bombarded with a bunch of feelings. Well everybody does bottle up some feelings and its common across the world. I do it too. If everybody would've dealt with their feelings head-on, then the world would've been a mean and cold place. But, also dealing with or letting go of those bottled up feelings, is important.
August 8th, 2016 11:49pm
Well normal is a big scale, it may be normal for a person to do that but it doesn't make it healthy.
- Expert in Managing Emotions
August 22nd, 2016 3:08am
People do bottle up their feelings most of the time. Whose to say whether its normal or not. But what i say is that it is not healthy for you to do so. Sooner or later it will burst out and it might blow out of per portion then it should. Deal with your emotions of cause in your own time. There is a time and place for everything.
September 6th, 2016 9:22am
This a normal behavior for many people, not a healthy one. venting out your feelings in an appropriate way is a healthy choice.
October 4th, 2016 11:00pm
Sometimes bottling up feelings is like a way to feel safer and to avoid the situation you should be dealing with. Even thought it might be something that people do often, bottling up your feelings is never good because you will end up with a huge amount of "repressed" emotions and they will come out eventually all at the same time, pretty much like an explosion. That's bad because you can end up making a decision that's harmful to you or to others around you. So the best thing you should do is to deal with one emotion at a time when the problem comes so you can solve it quickly and move on.
October 31st, 2016 9:30pm
In my experience, it's completely normal. Emotions can be scary, confusing and unexpected and sometimes we'd rather just push them aside instead facing them head on. Although it isn't really healthy - yes, it's totally normal and understandable if you do that.
June 12th, 2017 6:03pm
I don`t like hearing the word normal, as normal is always based of someone elses judgement. It`s unhealthy to bottle up your feelings, as the less you talk about something, the more it can affect you. Dealing with problems can be a really hard thing to do, especially if you don`t know how, but you don`t have to bottle everything up, you can always speak to a listener like myself, or someone you trust.
November 21st, 2017 7:43am
I would say that it could be normal, depending on what it's like where you're from. Some cultures do not allow people to express certain types of emotions within the group, while other, seemingly worse emotions are tolerated. I would temper my answer with, I don't think It's healthy for some people to bottle their frustrations up, it leads to having to deal with them in a different way or at a different time. Sometimes that works for some people, and they enjoy performing that function for others.
December 12th, 2017 4:01pm
It is very normal for me to bottle up my feelings because I don't have to explain to anybody. It makes me me
July 20th, 2020 5:34pm
Absolutely! Especially if you are a teenager, because at this point in life, you don't know how to deal with all the crazy things around you. from my experience, however, it might be a good idea to find some way to let your feelings out before you explode on a single person for doing nothing wrong. For example, finding one person who you trust and love and telling them how you feel. This is a great way to carry out your day without all the stress of ife on your shoulders. make time to call this trusted person, and make sure that you get everything out, without hurting that persons feelings. And also make sure that if this doesn't work, try something else, because if you keep your feelings bottled up, from my personal experience, that can only end badly.
November 22nd, 2021 1:13am
Bottling up your feelings can be detrimental to your mental health if not assessed properly. If you don't eventually let out your feelings it could create an overwhelming feeling and lead to an anxiety or panic attack or other negative feelings. In my experience I have found it best, to find one person I trust and express my feelings to them and tell them how I feel so I can get what I'm feeling off my chest. If you don't eventually deal with your feelings and you bottle them up, it could lead to feeling anxious or sad and it may interfere with your everyday life.
December 20th, 2021 11:17pm
Bottling feelings is a genuine human reaction. When we feel overwhelmed by something we may not want to experience both our own emotional reactions, or those which come from the people around us. Similarly, bottling up feelings can even be a way simply avoiding them altogether, and that's okay. If you don't feel ready to let those feelings out or talk about it then that's fine. You need not force yourself to overcome things if you don't yet feel up to the task. Even simply letting those feelings flow can be difficult, so please do not feel disheartened by your need to bottle up. Eventually, in time, you may be able to open up, have a cry or a shout, or talk to someone, and it will feel right.