What can I do to better manage my overwhelming sexual desires by my own without a counsellor/psychologist? How can I stop masturbating and stop watching pornography?

76 Answers
Last Updated: 05/16/2019 at 6:42am
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Top Rated Answers
Anonymous
June 21st, 2016 6:40am
First you must develop a social life. Staying at home alone is a bad idea. Go for a walk make friends, start hobbies or sports where you are not alone. Secondly you must make it difficult for yourself to do anything you dont want. Turn off the wi-fi at home unless you need it for something important. Take the t.v and computer/laptop out of your room and put it in a public space. Search the internet and try to find the many support groups and organizations that exist that adress this issue.
Anonymous
June 22nd, 2016 1:49am
Sometimes people master are because there's nothing else to do and that leads to porn. It's the same when some people eat. They only do it because there is nothing else going on. But if it is more serious and you have almost a craving to masterbate. Then you have to slowly wane yourself off. Don't go cold turkey just replace it with something else that will busy your mind and hands maybe excersise and listen to music or read. Whatever it takes.
Anonymous
July 15th, 2016 6:43am
It's natural to have sexual desires; it's part of who you are and as part of being a human being. It's perfectly healthy to sexually gratify yourself. If something's bothering you, try taking a moment to address what of thoughts you've been having, and when you are most overwhelmed by your urges. Perhaps, there is a something in your life that needs to be alleviated. Perhaps, you might need some way to relieve stress. A counselor/psychologist may even be the person to help you figure it all out, it's perfectly understandable.
Luna19993
February 7th, 2019 3:47am
If this is a genuine concern or worry, I believe that maintaining that time to do other things can be incredibly productive. Take a long, hot shower. Go for a jog until the will subsides. It might sound ridiculous, but call a friend or a family member and have a chat to them for a while. Keep your mind and body active and start growing used to not doing it. But don't be too hard on yourself if you slip up. Masturbation is entirely natural and it brings pleasure. There is no shame in it. Be gentle with yourself. It takes time.
Anonymous
July 10th, 2016 7:32am
I don't see anything in masturbating nor in watching porn. If you are not sexually active then it can be a helpful resource. If not, being active and distracted may help as well.
Anonymous
September 8th, 2016 4:04pm
Distract yourself. Keep yourself busy with things you love, or even better a sport you like. Thus you will be too tired to even think of it and it also helps to maintain your health
Anonymous
May 21st, 2017 1:42pm
Since masturbation can be a response to boredom or frustration, try finding some other distractions or hobbies when you feel the urge to do it. Also consider the possibility that masturbation is not a bad thing - it doesn't hurt anyone and can be a good form of stress relief.
Anonymous
March 9th, 2019 8:10pm
I think technology plays a big part of our bedtime routine. I also had this problem, and for me, it wasn't until I forced myself to stop that I actually did. It was very hard for me. One thing I suggest is to try and go one day without it, then two, then three, and so one. I know you might make a mistake in the schedule, but continue to space out the days of watching porn until you stop completely, and masturbating seems like a past part of your life! Hopefully it can also help you setting those goals!
Anonymous
June 29th, 2016 2:56am
Find other hobbies to replace those actions. When you find yourself craving those things, do the hobby in place of it.
Anonymous
July 1st, 2016 12:41pm
There are support groups for people with these addictions. If you are not comfortable joining a groups it might be helpful to have a trusted friend who you can reach out to when you have these urges. It can get your mind off of the urge and help you feel cared for in a different way. Sexual addiction is a form of self medication. Find something else that makes you feel good which is less destructive and give that a go when you would normally being acting out on your urged. Sometimes sexual/porn addiction stems from boredom and then becomes a destructive habit. Treat yourself to other enjoyable things. You got this!
HumbleBeefSandwich
July 6th, 2016 5:28pm
Perhaps as yourself why you are having these desires - what will sex bring you? Happiness? Confidence? something else? Once you are aware of WHY you have these desires, you can replace it with other things that will give you what you are looking for - lets say its confidence, just for giggles - perhaps join a gym or learn a new skill to become more confident, for example - i know this is easier said than done, but perhaps you are missing somthing else in your life that is the actual cause for why you are having these desires... hope this helps, if even a little Mike
Anonymous
July 8th, 2016 5:01pm
To manage issues like this it takes time to stop and focus on the world again. Remember however that there is nothing wrong with this and it is a phase of growing up, soon you will grow out of it and be able to focus on other things in your life. In the meantime, fill your time with productive tasks that you need to do and distract yourself from those urges.
Flawlessinsanity21
July 8th, 2016 7:46pm
That is a situation I definitely would not take up on my own. I don't really have any suggestions, I guess because that isn't my area of profession and I do not know much about it. But that is definitely something I would see a counselor about instead of trying to overcome yourself, especially if you are unsure about ways to overcome it.
Anonymous
July 9th, 2016 7:23am
Investing in other hobbies, going out more, exercising, pursuing the arts. The best way might be to place your devices / use them in front of people so you'll be less likely to watch.
Anonymous
July 24th, 2016 10:42pm
If you need to stop watching pornography,you should get a family member or friend to block porn websites and put a password lock on. You can also call your internet provider.
Anonymous
July 28th, 2016 10:32am
Try to lower your daily dose of Sexuality activity everyday, until you find that you no longer need it. If you can't, try lowering it once a week.
Anonymous
July 29th, 2016 1:07am
If pornography and masturbation are overtaking your life, they may each be an addiction and in any case, addiction is best treated with professional help as it is very difficult to overcome without a guide.
adoredIcicle46
July 29th, 2016 9:10pm
It can be hard to stop sexual desires but it is possible. Imagine your sexual desires like a bull. A bull is known to be wild and rarely tame but can be calm but sometimes that bull may be always up an running. To calm the "bull" you have to give it time and try to avoid triggering the bull like avoiding porn and anything sexual. It may be hard but you will definetely heal with some effort.
miraculousBeauty49
August 4th, 2016 11:14pm
Distracting yourself with other activities and hobbies will help. Taking up hobbies or charity work will mean you have less time to do the things you're trying to stop doing.
Anonymous
August 6th, 2016 8:17am
Find something else that interests you to distract yourself but also know that those desires are ok.
Supergirl94
August 10th, 2016 5:35am
It takes a lot of self control, A LOT! Eliminate anything that could cause triggers to masturbate or watch porn, if possible. Otherwise try to find ways to distract yourself. When you want to do it, find something else to do. Try to move your thoughts in another direction, to something productive. Pleasing yourself to some degree is normal and sometimes needed for your health. :) So you could also moderate it, give yourself how many times and for how long you can do it. There are also support groups to help you with it.
Anonymous
August 25th, 2016 6:07am
The best strategy is distraction. Find something else that you enjoy, for example a hobby. Next is helping some people in their work and hanging out with them. Or cheering up someone who had a bad day. The appreciation feels great and shows us that how amazing we can be, if we want to.
paperCrane15
September 2nd, 2016 7:30pm
You can sublimate. Redirecting sexual energy into something helps a lot. Try art, or some other kind of activity
Anonymous
September 8th, 2016 11:48pm
Well for one, you don't need a psychologist about sexual desires. Maybe if you are confused about your sexuality, then yeah. But I dont think counseeling is required for that. Its a personal matter. How can people stop masturbating and watching porn? Well personally, I think that it is ones choice about masturbation. Self pleasure, and pleasure done by someone else is a normal human thing. If you want to stop watching porn, maybe you can imagine a scene, or visualize what you want to happen. Its all personal preference. But if you want to stop both entirely, Just do things to take your mind off it. If you get urges, go pick up a book. Theres so many ways to stop it. But again, there is nothing wrong with masturbation, or pornography. Child porn, now that is not okay and should be reported. And if you are under 18 I don't think you should be watching porn. But again, this is all my opinion. Sorry if I jumped around allot.
TheTripleS719
September 17th, 2016 5:08am
It honestly depends on how long this has been going on. The shorter the time, the easier. You might need someone else to help you, which may not be the preferred route, but is definitely worth it.
Devoss
September 17th, 2016 8:51am
Sometimes accepting the fact that we may need help its a good way to start, as individuals we are all diferent and respond diferent to all treatments, you can see this in medical treatments, not everyone gets the same dose of a medicine, which goes alike for therapy and treatment, not everyone has the exact same treatment. It must be adjusted to the patients need, so giving you advice or a random technique may not be so effective for you, feel free to assist to any of our therapists or members of 7 Cups team :) we are glad to help
Anonymous
September 23rd, 2016 3:50pm
What I did was exchange my phone for a flip phone, and delete all my history so I wouldn't be tempted to do it. I also put a password block on those websites, passwords that I would not remember. The mastrubating problem, I have no idea how to.
MessengerOfPeace01
October 27th, 2016 2:25pm
Just keep yourself busy and physically active, do sports and anything to distract you on your free time
Anonymous
November 3rd, 2016 2:12pm
For one, you have to try to strengthen your self will. Also, getting rid of, or putting "things" out of sight helps. Busy yourself so you don't have the time either.
Anonymous
November 27th, 2016 1:18am
It's okay to reach out ot a counsellor or professional whenever anything is interfering with your day-to-day well-being. Asking here is a great start, but a trained professional would be okay to speak to. It's brave to reach out and shows a sign of strength and hope! Personally, you may need to ask yourself some difficult questions and be honest with your own answers without judgment, questions like why do you masturbate? why do you watch pornography? what feelings do you experience before, during, and after these activities? would you call this behavior part of an obsessive pattern? if so, can you change the pattern every so slightly, little-by-little? What tiny changes can you think of that can change your masturbation ritual? What other activities or things can you pursue that will bring up the fulfillment of the emotions you listed earlier? Love yourself, explore your options, and good luck.