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Why can't I control my tears?

23 Answers
Last Updated: 04/25/2018 at 1:49am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Brenda King, PsyD


I treat life changes, women’s issues, and issues of aging using evidence-based treatments with healthy doses of warmth, empathy and humor to enhance healing and growth.

Top Rated Answers
October 15th, 2015 3:14am
It may be because your heart is sensitive. Or it may be because you have no control over it. Both are a bit different. I'm the latter and it is very hard to control my tears even when I think I am not sad or mad.
May 27th, 2015 4:42am
I have an extremely empathic nature and want to help everyone.. I hurt when people hurt and am sensitive to how others are feeling. Sometimes find myself getting teary when others are feeling down.
June 13th, 2016 8:50am
You probably can't control your tears because of loss or sadness and I'm here to listen to everything that you have to say about it.
December 1st, 2015 2:28pm
Crying as a part of human emotions are completely normal. It is important you don't force yourself to stop crying because your tears help you express grief, anger, sadness, joy, you name it. Emotions cannot be controlled and the good news is you don't need to.
May 23rd, 2015 5:47am
Crying is a very odd bodily function - even science doesn't totally understand why we do it. Getting tears under control can be extremely difficult for some people, myself included. One trick I've found that helps me is telling myself that I will save it for later - if it's an inappropriate or inconvenient situation to be in I say that I will allow myself to cry as much as I need to when I'm alone, but not now. A physical trick I use is also pressing my tongue to the roof of my mouth, I've found that helps too for some reason.
March 9th, 2015 6:08pm
That depends on whether it happens when you're crying or when you're feeling normal. Not being able to control your tears why crying is absolutely normal, at least I know I can't do it. If it happens in usual situations it might be a problem.
March 10th, 2015 7:29am
Sometimes, all the frustration, anger, pain and stress all go down to crying. Crying is one of the ways we can rid ourselves of all the burden we are hiding from everyone else. It's not about controlling it, maybe it feels like that because you are stopping yourself from such. Always remember that it's okay to cry, it's not a sign of weakness.
October 6th, 2015 6:36am
Because it s natural and you have a sensitive heart. And tears takes away all you sorrows. So let tears take away your pain and bring you peaceful mind.
July 12th, 2016 1:40am
Tears are your body's way of getting all that ugly stress and anxiety and sadness out. It's like sweating: when it's hot, you sweat to cool down. When you feel bad, you cry to feel better. And I don't know about you, but as much as I wish I could control my sweating habits, I can't, but that doesn't mean I'm gonna stop spending my summer days in the sun.
June 17th, 2015 6:15pm
Why would you want to control your tears? They are by no means a sign of weakness. Feel blessed that you are capable of crying. It is such a pure emotions, that all the pretentious people find it hard to take in. Let out all your emotions. Feel proud and cry when you feel like.
June 30th, 2015 6:57am
Because it's a normal reaction! Tears are a sign of emotion and they need to come out for the better
April 14th, 2015 1:46pm
It is good to let them flow. Controlling tears increase weight in your heart and heart should be free, light, and bright so let them flow and if not in public, cry in private.
July 13th, 2015 8:48pm
You're sad. It's as simple as that. And it's okay to be sad and cry once in a while. Just remember that behind every cloud is a rainbow
April 25th, 2018 1:49am
I've always been a VERY sensitive person, and I'm done with crying when frustrated and emotional. I know it's healthy, but I know I shouldn't cry this much.
October 27th, 2015 11:38am
Thats okay. Neither can I. It is hard, but you are only human, and some times, you just need a cry. After a good cry, you might find the issue afterwards. Some people are naturally lucky (not like me) and know the cause of their sadness before crying, but others don't find out why until after they have a cry. Do you know why you are crying?
November 23rd, 2015 12:48am
Tears are a natural part of us being human beings. Crying is something that helps relieve us and shouldn't be held back.
November 23rd, 2015 4:43am
Tears are most often produced during periods of intense emotion like grief, anger, or even joy or laughter. Thus one reason for uncontrollable tears may be persistent emotional trauma, or untended needs. On a subtler biological note, tears in females have been shown to reduce aggression in males of the same species. From this, one may reasonably question whether in some cases uncontrollable crying is a line of defense, however involuntary, against inappropriate or excessive predation, dominion and so on.
October 11th, 2016 9:36am
Crying is a natural thing, and sometimes subconscious. Also, its involuntary, unless you're the type that can force yourself to cry. You just can't help it.
June 4th, 2015 11:17pm
You need to allow yourself to cry and not try to control whether or not you cry. You might need to get a good cry or let the tears flow because of some emotions you're feeling. There's nothing wrong with crying. If you don't like doing it in front of others then find some place where you can do it alone.
January 19th, 2016 8:59pm
Crying is a way of letting out your emotions. Without tears, people wouldn't know you're feeling upset. It is a way to express yourself through times of good and bad. I wouldn't be upset about it, I'd take it as a blessing.
August 4th, 2015 6:01pm
Tears are result, so when you try to make yourself feeling better and stop thinking about negatives thoughts, you will control your tears!
January 19th, 2016 1:55pm
Perhaps, the question should be , 'why are you trying to control them in the first place ?" , since if you are crying uncontrollably there must be some very strong feelings inside of you that need to be released. Allow yourself to cry, don't try and suppress it. At the same time, reflect on these emotions. Why are you feeling sad? What can you do to heal the wound? Is there somebody you can talk to ? What unresolved issues do you need to come to terms with? If somebody hurt your feelings then perhaps talking to them would be the first step.
July 26th, 2016 1:25am
Sometimes it's the best to express your feelings, crying is a good way to do that, to relief some stress, you will feel better after that.