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How do I calm down?

29 Answers
Last Updated: 07/27/2020 at 8:25pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
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Sarah Robb, LISW-S (Licensed Independent Social Worker, Supervisor Designation) and LICDC (Licenced Chemical Dependency Counselor)

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

Difficult roads often lead to beautiful destinations. Life poses many challenges. Learning to face, cope with, and resolve these challenges can increase our resilience.

Top Rated Answers
AlexKej
December 12th, 2014 11:05am
Calming down is essential for me, as I suffer from anxiety disorder and panic attacks. What helps me is most definitely distraction - I realize sometimes it's really hard to leave your work and responsibilities, but health is the most important. Whether watching a movie or reading a book - if you are not sure why you feel stressed/anxious this is the best. Furtherly, when you realize whad made you anxious, TAKE TIME TO WORK IT THROUGH. Seriously. write down the thought that caused you anxiety and ask yourself some questions: why do I think certain way? Am I biased? What are the proofs that this is true? What are the proofs that this is not true? Try to be as objective as you can. When you get anxious in a public place, breathing slowly with your daphragm and keeping your breath for at least 6 seconds is crucial. Then imagine something full of various colors. It will help your brain to distract from anxiety/panic. Please, remember, put yourself first.
emergeintolight
December 26th, 2014 3:24am
Diaphragmatic breathing and visualization usually work for me. I close my eyes, take a couple deep breaths and imagine myself somewhere peaceful. I concentrate on all the aspects of that place, contructing it from memory. After doing that for a few minutes, I start calming down. Thought distraction is also a great way to calm yourself down, you could do that by counting the wrinkles on your palm.
OolongFantasy
December 11th, 2014 5:03am
Square breathing is always a good tactic. Inhale 4 seconds, hold your breath 4 seconds, exhale 4 seconds, hold your breath for 4 seconds.
Becca0926
July 27th, 2015 3:20pm
It will obviously depend on the person, but I fully believe in the grounding techniques used for anxiety/panic attacks. There are many ways you can do this, but one I like is the 54321 method, where you focus your senses on your surroundings. (name 5 things you see, 4 things you feel, 3 things you hear, 2 things you smell...)
Randy1
April 9th, 2015 11:56pm
Try using a distraction technique. For example, while you take deep breaths, try to name every city you have ever visited or something like that, or perhaps try to envision yourself in a warm and safe place. some people even close their eyes and picture a red stop sign and they say to themselves "stop, stop stop stop" until they find themselves calming down. There are many things to try.
Turtrox
December 29th, 2014 9:17am
(I read this on the internet and found it very helpful!) Try to contract and relax various muscles in your body, start from your toes up. Try to find as many muscles as possible, and focus on the movements of your body parts rather than on the panic inducing situation at hand. Generally, by the time your reach your head, you should have calmed down!
Anonymous
December 14th, 2014 12:00am
Picture something peaceful in your mind, do a small ritual like making tea, take slow deep breaths, look up pictures of baby animals or something else that makes you smile
Anonymous
April 28th, 2020 11:41pm
Breathe and think of happy thoughts. I know sometimes this can be very hard, but you must at least try. If this does not work I strongly suggest talking to someone. Doing this has calmed me down numerous times. You can talk to a trusted adult, friend, sibling, or use this app to talk to other people. Finding a distraction is also very helpful. Watching YouTube videos, a funny movie, or a comedy show really helps sometimes. Just use past experiences of how you have calmed yourself to your advantage. Going outside and walking or sitting also really helps.
Pumpkin74
July 10th, 2018 2:44am
There are many ways to calm down but it is not always easy depending on your location. If you are in a public place such as work, taking a walk to the bathroom and rubbing your hands together until they are warm and placing them over your eyes is a technique that many use. Another that is sometimes implemented are distracting the senses for a short time. 5: Acknowledge FIVE things you see around you. Maybe it is a bird, maybe it is pencil, maybe it is a spot on the ceiling, however big or small, state 5 things you see. 4: Acknowledge FOUR things you can touch around you. Maybe this is your hair, hands, ground, grass, pillow, etc, whatever it may be, list out the 4 things you can feel. 3: Acknowledge THREE things you hear. This needs to be external, do not focus on your thoughts; maybe you can hear a clock, a car, a dog park. or maybe you hear your tummy rumbling, internal noises that make external sounds can count, what is audible in the moment is what you list. 2: Acknowledge TWO things you can smell: This one might be hard if you are not in a stimulating environment, if you cannot automatically sniff something out, walk nearby to find a scent. Maybe you walk to your bathroom to smell soap or outside to smell anything in nature, or even could be as simple as leaning over and smelling a pillow on the couch, or a pencil. Whatever it may be, take in the smells around you. 1. Acknowledge ONE thing you can taste. What does the inside of your mouth taste like, gum, coffee, or the sandwich from lunch? Focus on your mouth as the last step and take in what you can taste. At home, you can exercise, take a bubble bath, listen to your favorite music etc. While these things work for some, sometimes there are other things that can be better. Explore some coping skills and make a list of things you can do and practice them not only while you are not calm, but also while you are at peace. This helps us not relate the coping skill with stress. Its a trial until you find the perfect one that helps you but no matter what, dont go through this alone and always talk things out with someone when you can! :)
YourFriendLily
May 19th, 2020 2:54am
I've noticed that when I'm feeling very overwhelmed or frustrated, it's because there is too much going on at once and I'm over stimulated. To combat this, I go to a quiet room, dim the lights (or turn them off) and put on ocean waves. Eventually, I put on a favorite funny show as a distraction. Sometimes, I go in the completely opposite direction. I'll throw on headphones and get outside for a fast-paced walk or run until I feel back to baseline. In either case, I try to take the time for myself so I can get in the right headspace before I make the next move and so that I can objectively process the situation that caused the issue in the first place.
OnTheMoon
July 2nd, 2018 6:21pm
You can try many different techniques, like breathing excercises, meditation, venting (for example to a Listener!), grounding techniques like naming all the blue things in a room (helps with panic attacks)... There are many resources here on 7 Cups. Check them out!
clockworkcorndog
December 11th, 2014 1:40am
Try timed breathing. It can help you can down and there's even apps to help time it. Breath in a pattern and about down your thoughts
Anonymous
July 18th, 2016 7:42am
I calm down by deep breathing, and telling myself I can achieve whatever I'm wanting to achieve at the time - this gives me confidence. I also listen to calming music at times - some classical music does the trick for me, but nature sounds work for me too - except water sounds! (Those make me want to go to the restroom!)
YellowDaydream
June 7th, 2016 5:27pm
Try out the mindfulness exercises! Terrific :D You can also try tensing different muscles and relaxing. Listening to soothing music or meditation is great too!
UniqueBella
May 3rd, 2016 10:10am
Release your energy on something. For example, during a speech or presentations, have cue cards and rub your thumbs against the paper holding the cards 80-90 degrees so people can't tell you're nervous while speaking because you're releasing the nerves by being active without anyone seeing it.
safeshoulder2CryOn
July 27th, 2020 8:25pm
There are many anxieties calming techniques available today. These calming techniques start with controlling the thoughts in our minds. Our thoughts affect our moods, desires, feelings, attitudes, decisions, and behaviors in surprising ways. Mindfulness limits thoughts overload by focusing on singular thoughts. Recovery is a process of calming yourself by monitoring negative self-talk,striving to reach a peaceful, stable state where you can reach your full potential with positivity. In order to calm down, you need to shift the negative triggers into positive Self-Care and Self-Compassion routines that will improve your well-being. Stress is an innate trigger which can be mitigated by choosing the right(or better) response. You can do the things you enjoy or seek to speak to a person who can calm you down or go for a stroll to get perspectives on things. Alternatively, you could resort to playing a musical instrument, wood working, diy or drawing. Or even listening to birds dongs, watching clouds, cycling, swimming, baking, sculpturing, reading or playing with a pet.
TheLilyPond
April 8th, 2016 4:23am
One exercise that I enjoy is thinking back to a time where I have felt really relaxed. If you can close your eyes and picture that in your mind; remember the sounds, sights, smells, textures etc of that situation. That combined with some breathing exercises. I also enjoy meditation. There are many apps out there that can take you through guided meditations. Ultimately, everyone has something that works best for them, so it's about finding what works best for you! Then give yourself permission to do that. :)
frostyTurtle27
April 5th, 2016 12:07pm
Focus on your breathing, feel it go in and out, and think of happy thoughts and memories whilst you are calming down. There are also apps that can help, such as Calm, which helps you calm down.
Moonbeam21
November 3rd, 2015 9:33pm
Take a few deep breaths! Inhale through your nose for 4 seconds, hold your breath for 2 seconds, then release all of the breath through your nose for 4 seconds. Repeat 3 or 4 times. Or try gently squeezing your thumb in he opposite palm for a few minutes- weird but works! Be kind to yourself :)
theflyingtoaster
September 15th, 2015 3:26pm
Stop. Take two minutes to sit quietly. Clear your mind. Pretend you're the only person in the room. Listen to your breathing. Draw some doodles. Write a poem, or a story, expressing your feelings.
PoliteOcean
August 31st, 2015 4:33am
It can be difficult to calm yourself down depending on the situation that you are in or thinking of. Try thinking of things that make you calm, calm you down or divert your attention else where. Personally, I come to 7cups!
shortCircuit
June 17th, 2015 10:04pm
Listening to music and sitting by a beautiful place, like a beach, lake or a river always helps. That is all you need to calm down and relax, to get your mind off the back things in life.
Anonymous
May 17th, 2015 11:36pm
Try to use some of the tool that 7 Cups of Tea Guides has the information is and can be helpful. And there are listener that can help you find ways to cope.
Cheer4Ever
May 8th, 2015 6:47pm
I listen to music to help me calm down. That way I can choose music to help me feel better weirder it be helping me get everything out by crying or just forgetting about what's wrong for a little while.
Anonymous
January 6th, 2015 12:13pm
You could try meditation or mindfulness exercises. To get started maybe look up videos on youtube or check out apps, there are plenty! Deep breathing exercises are also often good to calm down.
Anonymous
December 18th, 2014 2:20am
The best way to calm down is to first breath from the diaphragm. Once you have accomplished this slower and more productive breathing I suggest doing any activity you enjoy that relaxes you, whether that be reading, watching tv, taking a bath, or going on a run.
peachicus
December 14th, 2014 11:31pm
Sit yourself down some where quite if possible and focus on your breathing, take deep long breaths and focus on how it feels and imagine with every exhale you feel calmer it may help to close your eyes too :)
AngeloF102
December 12th, 2014 9:10pm
A good way to calm yourself down is to engage in events or activities that are interesting or joyful to you, in order to ease the sense of anxiousness or being 'riled up.'
ListeningGamer
December 11th, 2014 8:11am
Well that question simply relies on what you like to do to bring yourself down from emotions that cause anxiety, depression and anger. I would suggest taking a minute or two out of your day to sit down and just relax. Take a minute to take in everything and breathe. As humans with the fast lifestyle that we've adapted to, we sometimes forget to slowdown after a stressful day.