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How do I decide if I want to keep my child or give him or her up for adoption?

20 Answers
Last Updated: 12/09/2019 at 1:40am
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United States
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Top Rated Answers
December 9th, 2019 1:40am
Think about what you and the child need, in material and emotional terms. You have to make sure that the decision is good for both of you, otherwise you'd both end up unhappy. Don't be afraid to look for support. You're the only one who can make the decision, but it can help you to talk about it with a trusted friend or a therapist, as long as you don't let them influence your final choice.
October 29th, 2014 1:53am
Look for what is best for them first. See if you will be able to answer all their needs : food, clothing, housing, emotional support, etc.
October 29th, 2014 8:52pm
Ask yourself if you are emotionally, mentally, and physically stable enough to care for your child. Then ask yourself if you are financially stable enough.
November 2nd, 2014 8:05pm
Well you should consider both options, and take both of them very seriously and look to the future. Just look at yourself, it's completely different for everyone. J
November 12th, 2014 9:28pm
I faced that very hard decision myself. There are a few questions you need to ask yourself:' Can I support this child'; 'who will help me raise this child' (i.e. mother, boyfriend, grandparent), and 'am I ready to be a parent.' Just know that giving your baby up for adoption is one of the hardest processes to go through.
November 15th, 2014 2:50pm
Uhh...every mother needs to be a good offense...but from this I can conclude you won't be good
November 17th, 2014 4:36pm
You can never know before you actually hold this child. I mean it's probably the best for you and the baby when you live in "a not so good condition". But only you know what's best for you and your baby.
January 5th, 2015 6:14am
You need to have a lot of information from those that have gone before. Talk to attorneys, agencies, adoptive parents, other birthmothers, anyone and everyone. I am a birthmother and I'd be happy to share my experience.
May 6th, 2015 7:04pm
It won't be an easy decision, but really think about it, can you live without the child your about to bring in this world or will you be able to sacrifice raising your child so someone else can experieince parent hood and for the other reasons that made you consider adoption
Anonymous - Expert in Parenting
June 3rd, 2015 9:18pm
That's always a tough choice for anyone. Take into consideration if adoption would be best for both of you. Are you financially stable enough to take care of the child? Do you have help with taking care of the child? You have to do what's in the best interest for you and your child.
June 30th, 2015 4:53pm
If you feel like you could care and give you're child a good home, I think that should be taken into consideration when deciding weather or not to give your child up for adoption.
September 8th, 2015 7:50pm
If you are entertaining these thoughts, there is a very good chance that you are poorly prepared financially, emotionally, or in some other way to handle the responsibilities of having a baby. Think not of what is best for you, but what is best for your child. If you have not been around babies and seen what they require, spend some time with mothers and their children. Observe. Ask questions. Evaluate. There is no black and white answer. There are pros and cons to both sides. I decided to keep my oldest son. I do not regret that, though, there are times I wonder if I made the right decision for him.
November 17th, 2015 3:34pm
Make sure you are doing whats in the best interest for your child no matter how hard it may be. Think about everything from money, housing and support. Make sure you have family and friends support.
November 17th, 2015 7:35pm
You should decide by thinking about the pros and cons of your child such as is my child in a safe area or do I have enough money to afford my child and etc
December 13th, 2015 6:55am
Well, first I would think about the possibility of life if you kept them. One of the number one tell tale signs you might want to consider giving them up for adoption is if you are in poverty, in an unsafe living situation, and if financial issues and safety are going to be a problem in the long run. Can you support the child and give it what it needs to thrive? If you cannot, I lightly suggest you to give them their best chance.
April 11th, 2016 9:11am
Decide first if you are able to provide and care for the child either on your own or with the support of your partner. Realize that this is a life time of responsibility and at the same time a blessing and and an opportunity to experience lots of happiness, joy, pain, disappointments and challenges.
May 23rd, 2016 8:19pm
If you feel you cant provide for your kid and want the child to have a great life and not go through struggle that will help you decide on what to do.
August 2nd, 2016 4:58am
Think about how you will be able to provide for the child and how you will help it have a healthy and happy life.
March 5th, 2018 10:15pm
This s a difficult question that has to do with many variables. Consider it only if you considered any other option or help available to you.
July 17th, 2018 9:51am
Take a look at your emotional and financial ability to raise a child. What resources do you have? What would the childs life be like if you raised them with where and who you are now? Most importantly, do you want to be caring for a child at this time? Because while parenthood is extremely rewarding, it is also physically, emotionally, and financially exhausting.