I am terrified my child will grow up with the same traumas that I suffered - how, on a very limited income, well below the poverty line, can I assure my child gets the most positive life experience?
Last Updated: 04/10/2018 at 9:01am
Meredith Seltzer, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
The therapeutic relationship can assist you in accomplishing your goals and clarifying your wants and needs. As a skilled counselor and therapist I will help you along the way
Top Rated Answers
By giving them unconditional love, I grew up with little money but also little love. You can do without the best toys and trainers. You cannot become emotionally stable without positive love no matter what they do. They will learn the value of money, hate they don't have the latest iPad but be able to look back and reflect on how much they were loved
Showing a child that you are working hard for them gives them the strength to go accomplish their dreams. I work with children and they don't worry about what they have in life to them it's all about embracing life and having fun. Smiling at a child can mean the world.
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Material possessions do not define traumatic experiences if you don't let them. Showing your child affection is more beneficial than any object.
Read to your child...stories of heroes and artists and other admirable people...the library is a house of beauty and truth, especially when a parent reads aloud with love
The most honest answer to this question is to just guide your child in the right direction. Its hard to think of our children growing up in the same environment that we grew up in, especially if it wasn't a pleasant situation. Just try to not make the same mistakes that were made when you grew up and guide your child to the right way to live. Unfortunately we cant make everything perfect as to us being human we all make mistakes, but we can always do the best that we can. As long as you put the effort in then you can always remember you did the best you can.
You are aware of your own traumas and work through it so you won't pass on anything abusive onto your child. And you do the best you can, being loving and considerate and if you work hard doing that then there's a good chance things will work out.
Traditions are very important, and cannot be bought with money. It will take some creativity, of course, but it can be done. We were not in poverty, but with 7 children and one income, we struggled from paycheck to paycheck. But our kids are all wonderful, productive adults. We played games together, both active and nonactive. We went to church together. We ate meals together. We spent time with extended family - picnics, birthday parties, etc. Togetherness and sharing fun are key.
Income has it's own importance for sustaining such as eating, clothes etc, but to assure your child has a positive life experience, having a constant support system, understanding and "safe-zone" is truly important. Having materialistic things in life means nothing when a child doesn't have the comfort of a "Home". You can never go wrong trying your best always and making sure you're always there for your children. Love is key.
Life isn't always about money. My mother didn't have much, but I was happy a lot because of the love she showed in other ways. Be close with your child, be a parent and a best friend, let them know they are important and loved, listen to them, and make them see that they are only as poor as they choose to be. You can be rich with love, companionship, happiness, among other things. I hope you give yourself credit for the things you do right, the love of a parent is extraordinary.
By being patient, loving and kind. Talk to them about positives and the negatives in life so they can be prepared. Teach them to appreciate a roof to sleep under, bed to sleep in, clothes, food. Point out on that not all are so lucky. Also teach them secondhand is recycling which is a good thing for the planet and you and they are doing your part by doing that. It is amazing what you can find secondhand that is new or as new. Let them know love, appreciation and kindness are the most important of all things to attain.
send them to school. tell them how important education is. try your best to make sure that they get as much knowledge as they possibly can.
I think the best things in life are free, I believe that if even if you don't have much, a child will still look up to you, your their parent, and as long you are there for them and support them, they're going to have a good life. Show them the little things in life, they b bring do much joy.
Always remember to tell your child that you want better for them and that they should work hard to be better then you. Tell them what are your dreams for them and why you have such a dream for them.
This is something that has terrified me ever since I found out I was pregnant with my now 7 year old son. It can be hard to focus on positives when you are constantly having to worry about money, and how you can afford this and that etc, the bare basic minimums to survive. The best things that I have found in my experience is the basic spending time with my child. We spend time drawing pictures and telling stories around them, playing games around the house and doing simple things like household chores can become fun activities together. It's not the money we spend on them that they remember when they grow up, it's the fun they had with the people who loved them the most to spend the time with them. My son might not have all the flashy gadgets and gizmos that all the kids seem to have these days, he might not go on fancy holidays or wear brand name clothes, but he is a happy little man, who loves nothing more than playing in the garden and making up stories, cuddles with mummy and general just having lots of laughs. This might not have answered your question but I wanted you to know that it's not the money that makes a happy childhood ... it's the love and attention you give them that the thrive on.
Time is worth so much more to a child than money, be there for your child, listen to them, teach them how to cope with emotions, love and understand them and most importantly, teach them that sharing their thoughts and feelings with you is a safe and rewarding experience for all.
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