Can a person still be termed as emotionally manipulative if he/she does not verbally abuse you or threaten you? Can both partners in a relationship be emotionally abusive to each other?
8 Answers
Last Updated: 07/20/2021 at 4:44am
Moderated by
Jennifer Fritz, LMSW, PhD
Clinical Social Work/Therapist
Day to day life can be stressful and overwhelming and my strength is assisting my clients in a supportive, empowering and practical manner.
Top Rated Answers
The answer to both questions is a resounding yes. Actions such as withholding affection or the giving someone the cold shoulder are emotionally manipulative behaviors. If these behaviors are carried out with malice and intent to cause harm, they are definitely abusive.
Absolutely. Emotional manipulation and abuse include more than just violent language... if the person is being deceptive, underhanded, and/or using your vulnerabilities against you (even in quiet or subtle ways), this is not good for you or the relationship. We all have wants and needs, but if someone is using anything other than straight forward, respectful, clear communication to try and achieve them, it's definitely possible they are being emotionally abusive or manipulative. Both partners can be partaking in the emotional abuse/manipulation - in fact, it wouldn't be surprising because it may be the environment in which the relationship has existed for some time. You may not realize it but it becomes how you communicate, even though it's not helping you.
Anonymous
November 22nd, 2016 5:29pm
Yes. They can make you think like YOU are not good enough for them, like you are not giving as much as they are. But what you can or cannot do is just enough really. If you feel like you should do more and if you are afraid to talk with you partner about it, there is something wrong.
Anonymous
September 19th, 2017 6:54am
I think there are definitely ways to be emotionally manipulative other than being verbally abusive or threatening--for example, overreacting when their partner tries to bring up a complaint and accusing them of not feeling love is manipulative because being able to openly communicate and mutually address problems is an important part of a healthy relationship. It's definitely possible for both partners to display unhealthy behavior especially if that's how precedents for dealing with issues have been set.
Google the word gaslighting. People who use this form of abuse can do so with elegance while making his partner look crazy.
Yes and yes. emotionally manipulative has nothing to do with abuse or threats. One can manipulate in many ways. YES both partners can be emotionally abusive and even feed off each other
Absolutely. Manipulation can occur without threats or verbal abuse. Gaslighting is a form of emotional abuse. So is constant lying and fighting and turning your words against you. These people are usually called narcissists. They exhibit emotionally manipulative behavior quite frequently and have either no idea they are doing it, or don’t care. One narcissist in a relationship is bad. 2 is a disaster waiting to happen.
If someone is feeling emotionally manipulated it's probably more important to explore why that may be happening and what can be done about it rather than getting caught up with terms. In my experience arguments that focus on laying blame or labeling someone as this or that tend to work against finding a solution because that argument can continue on and on with no results other than cycles of semantics, hurt feelings, even less communication, or just more abuse. Emotional abuse is accessible to both partners, especially if they've had a lot of experience on either side of it.
Related Questions: Can a person still be termed as emotionally manipulative if he/she does not verbally abuse you or threaten you? Can both partners in a relationship be emotionally abusive to each other?
I'm too short for a guy to date. What can I do?How do you tell your friend that you disagree with them without hurting their feelings?Why do I have a gut-wrenching feeling down my stomach after a friend told me something I disagree with, not physically, but emotionally?How do I know if I'm in love? How can I deal with someone that is acting like a 'diva'?What's the best way to deal with emotional blackmail from a partner? Because of my mental health condition, I think I'm probably being emotionally toxic to my bf. Is it best to just leave the relationship?How to express my feelings to my husband?My wife treats me like a servant. She doesn't do anything for herself and makes me do everything, How can I bring this up without royally upsetting her?What can I do when my husband constantly threatens for divorce anytime we disagree or argue? I have told him many times how his empty threats upset me, should I take him seriously?