Communication has been a issue for me my whole life. I am 35 years old I am engaged I just want to be a better man and learn to communicate better. Wondering if there was any one with some advice?
Last Updated: 12/14/2021 at 10:37am
Graham Barrone, Adip ICHP, MCBT
If you've found that your quality of life has reduced because of anxiety, fear or some kind of mental hurdle that you just can't get over then lets chat.
Top Rated Answers
Look into researching the 5 love languages! There are books, articles, videos, and quizzes you can take to figure out you and your partners love language. This can lead to a better understanding of how they like to be shown they are loved or open communication. It is great if you two have similar love languages but if you don't, this can be an amazing resource to use and revert back to continue to grow and learn what your partner needs from you and vise versa. There are 5 different love languages but it doesnt mean we all have to fit into only one, it may be a combination of them so dont feel pressured to have to fit any one specifically, just have fun with it.
The only thing I would suggest, and I have suggested this to my fiance as well since he has the same issue, is to get one on one therapy. Doesnt matter if it is online or face to face. Second, if it gets worse or just to help communicate together, couples counseling before you get married. We waited until the very last minute and with no time left before the wedding, we are having issues that should have been sorted out years ago.
🍃 Look for common interests Sometimes it can be difficult to make new acquaintances. If so, ask your friends to introduce you to someone. This method works both in real life and online. If you and the person don't have mutual acquaintances, try to find topics that are close to both of you. Don't be afraid to ask questions and talk about yourself. 🍃 Ask unusual questions People who discuss personal topics subconsciously get closer. Ask about what everyone wants to know but is afraid to ask. Continue the conversation by asking additional questions. There are many questions, such as these. What was the scariest thing you've ever done in your life? Tell us about your coolest trip. Do you like your lifestyle and lifestyle? What do you like the most in the world? Who besides your family gave you the most memorable lesson? 🍃 Look people in the eye A direct eye-to-eye gaze will bring you closer to the interlocutor. This will show that you are genuinely interested in him. It is not for nothing that they say that the eyes are the mirror of the soul. 🍃 Inspire The manner in which you communicate with people matters a lot. Make the other person believe in their own strength. Support him, give him advice, share your own experience. Charge the person with energy for new achievements. This will leave a positive impression on yourself and the person will want to meet you again. 🍃 Share your interests and hobbies When you talk about your favorite business, you glow from the inside. And people will definitely remember your emotions. Share interesting stories, tips, and experiences. In response, the other person will also tell you about their favorite activities. Don't pretend to be someone who you're not. Just be yourself. Good luck!
I came to 7cups because my husband has real trouble communicating and I felt like I needed someone else to talk to as I cant talk to him. I think its really amazing that you have this knowledge about yourself and want to be better. I wish we had done something about it before we got married and would love to go to couples therapy/marriage counselling with him but he won't do it. So I agree with the previous poster who suggested this for you. Good luck!
Sometimes it’s hard to get feelings out in the moment, I tend to freeze up a little and forget all my thoughts. It helps to write these things down in a notebook so it is easier to bring up to your partner, friend, or family member. I want you to try writing it down when something bothers you, and then asking whoever you have the problem with to sit down. You can either read it out loud or ask them to read it for themselves if you are too nervous/anxious to say it aloud yourself. Most people struggle with communication, so you are not alone.
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