I have messed up my relationship. What are some things I can do to make it better?
Last Updated: 11/16/2020 at 11:56am
Marriage & Family Therapist
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hello!! You can start by taking responsibility for what you did in the relationship. You can see what he or she wants you to do to improve the relationship. Also, APOLOGIZE, APOLOGIZE APOLOGIZE!! Doing all this depends on how bad what you did is. If it is completely horrible then there is not very much you can do unless your partner is willing to forgive you. If it is not that bad you can probably make everything up to them in no time at all. This is all really all up to you. You will figure out how to get through it. BELIEVE IN YOURSELF!!
Listening is a great way to gain back trust. When you want to make things better with someone you should always care about their needs instead of yours. This is often very hard because the first step is to get to know what the other person wants. Afterward, you can act it out. Some more specific tips: get to know the person's Love Language and use that knowledge; some people like to talk things out, others care more about actions; having a new experience together always helps. The most important thing, and there is no way of getting around it, is to figure out what the other person wants and giving it to them.
Messed up relationships are something that everybody have experienced in their life. There can be many reasons for that. I think that the most important thing is to realize if the messed relationship is worth saving. Sometimes, some relationships end because you have moved forward and your old relationship does not fit your new personality and lifestyle. In this case it is better to let be. In case that it is a relationship that you are willing to save, it always helps to show empathy and understanding. If you want to make some relationship better you can try to make your friend feel important by telling him/her things that you like about him/her, things that you admire and reasons why you are glad that you are friends.
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