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How can I improve my self esteem?

9 Answers
Last Updated: 08/08/2020 at 7:52am
How can I improve my self esteem?
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Brittany Kelley, MSW, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I am a psychodynamically trained clinical social worker. I find assisting women and families through difficult times an extremely rewarding and collaborative process.

Top Rated Answers
romanticthi3f
- Expert in Self-Esteem
February 20th, 2018 11:31pm
There are lots of different ways that you can improve your self-esteem; probably more than we could ever list here! - Try to increase your positive self-talk. What are the things that are good about yourself? Write them down, notice them - say them, scream them out loud! They are important. When we are stuck in low self-esteem we tend to dismiss them or forget them. - Take note of some of the terrible things you say about yourself. These might be comments like "I'm stupid" or "I'm such a failure". How true are they really? Often these thoughts are automatic so it's not easy - but it makes a huge difference. - Try to stop comparing yourself to other people. You're not like other people! You're you. - Focus on the things that you do enjoy. Find time for them; whether that's your hobbies/interests, family/friends or just things you like in general. :)
Anonymous
September 3rd, 2018 2:04pm
You can improve your self esteem by surrounding yourself with people who will support you and help you. Those people that spreads positivity and will help you by challenging you to become the best version of you. Those people who are honest with you. Those people who wants what's best for you. Those people who will bring you to the right path. Those people who doesn't drag you down. Those people that lifts you up and reminding you to keep on moving forward or in short, those people who cares for you not because you're famous or rich or like the person they can overpower but they care for you because they see something in you.
Anonymous
February 13th, 2018 4:48am
Consider keeping a journal of small accomplishments and things you're proud of yourself for, and remember that insecurities are based on assumptions, not reality.
sweetNarwhal82
February 26th, 2018 12:21pm
There are many things you can try. The important thing is to be consistent. If you want to give yourself 5 compliments every day and write them down, that is a great way to start!
TheBabyLion
March 13th, 2018 8:47am
The way I see it, there are basically 2 ways to "deal" with low self-esteem. One is like "overriding" - keep chanting to yourself, repeat some positive mantras or ideas until your conscious and subconscious mind starts living inside this new "truth". Another way is far less appealing - to become utterly honest with yourself and recognize all of your inner beliefs/fears/traumas that are in place and are, effectively, the cause of your low self-esteem. When you think about it - there cannot be a single goo reason to feel of yourself as a "not good enough" person. Therefore beliefs that are "saying" otherwise must eventually go.
endearingLion70
- Expert in Self-Esteem
June 5th, 2018 12:05pm
By looking at success rather than failure. By counting the positive things in your life. By performing good acts that help others.
Anonymous
December 1st, 2019 7:26pm
There are many different ways that you can go about improving your self esteem. These can be like using positive affirmations about yourself in order to try to have confidence boosts. Some helpful tips can include: Say stop to your inner critic (this meaning trying to replace the inner voice that you have that thinks down about you and getting rid of the self destructive thoughts that your inner critic may have about you). Another tip is Writing down 3 things in the evening that you can appreciate about yourself. This can allow you to think positively about yourself and having put it down on paper it is something that you are able to go back to. Setting realistic expectations can also be helpful in these situations as well
RebekahRoyal
July 19th, 2020 8:35pm
It can be super hard to have good self esteem. It's something I have struggled with a lot, and I'm sure many people before - and after - us will struggle with it at some point. You are not alone in having poor self-esteem. There are multiple ways in which we can improve our self esteem, including meditation, developing a sense of self-love, focusing on more positive things than negative things, and more. When we do things such as focusing on the positive, we are building up a layer of self-esteem that is needed for general functioning. Perhaps you could keep note of all of the things that lower your self-esteem or make you feel down, and work to improve them.
sunflowergirl2003
August 8th, 2020 7:52am
I surround myself with people who I know truly value me and see my worth. In moments where I feel badly about myself, I have them to bring me back up and remind me of my significance. You can change simple things too. For eg: the way you talk to yourself. When we experience some kind of failure, we beat ourselves over it and get so incredibly critical and negatively view ourselves. But say a friend went through that and was thinking about those things. You, as the person's friend don't think that he/she is a failure or any of those things we ordinarily tell ourselves in moments of difficulty. Imagine if you spoke to yourself the same way you spoke to a friend, comforting them when they felt low about their self esteem. This exercise seemed a bit silly to be at first but it genuinely helped. I looked at myself in the mirror and I actually spoke self affirming and positive things to myself. It felt kind of fake at first but with time, I started to actually believe the things I was telling myself and trusting that my words about myself were true. Say things such as the things you love about yourself. Say things that you are truly happy for in your life. Stop comparing yourself to other people. We all have things about ourselves that makes us special in our own way. Everyone has their own different strengths and weaknesses. Comparing yourself to a whole different person will only bring you down further. You are your only competition. We are always way too harsh on ourselves. We are more special than we make ourselves out to be. Just remember that.