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How can I cope with the thoughts of me deserving suffering and pain without hurting myself?

13 Answers
Last Updated: 12/12/2017 at 8:10am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Susana Diaz, lpc

Licensed Professional Counselor

I believed that to be a successful therapist is to be able to empathize and connect with all clients. My work with clients is to help them identify resources to cope.

Top Rated Answers
April 27th, 2015 7:45pm
You don't deserve pain. Repeat that to yourself. No one deserves suffering and pain. If you've been through a lot or done a mistake in the past, you don't need to hurt yourself. You need learn from the mistake, learn from it and move on.
September 21st, 2015 4:17pm
Tell yourself it is NOT your fault and you don't deserve it. Next time you feel like it, take a deep breath, repeat those words to yourself and do something to distract you. Listen to music, Draw, strike up a conversation with someone new.
January 31st, 2017 7:49am
You can find a creative, artistic outlet. By distracting yourself with a creative outlet such as writing, painting or listening to music. You'll be able to not just understand how you few, but also find a potential hobby to develop further and engage in. You don't need to become the next Vincent Van Gogh, but art is a medium with which many people use to cope and use to gain further intrapersonal knowledge.
June 1st, 2015 4:49am
I would recommend talking back to those negative voices that tell you you deserve to be hurt. So, for every time you think you need to be hurt, tell yourself that you are a good person who deserves to be happy. It's kind of a "fake it till you make it" strategy.
August 25th, 2015 6:57pm
what ever you had done , making yourself suffer can't fix it . thing about your pain as an alarm that will make you learn not to do it again , and never fight the pain. review your thing about deserving suffer from something had been from the past
December 7th, 2015 9:44pm
Take it easy on yourself. Try to think positive thoughts, eventhough that might seem very difficult to do, and do something you enjoy doing, like reading a book or playing a video game.
January 26th, 2016 6:19pm
For me negative thoughts like these are like clouds that pass infront of the sun because they will pass and it's important not to dwell on them and to move on from them :)) Take Care x
February 16th, 2016 1:29pm
I think it would be a good idea to find somthing that you are interested in that you can go and do whenever you feel like hurting yourself.
February 17th, 2016 7:19am
When people feel like wants to hurt themselves, they can rub ice on the surface of the place where they wanted to cut or harm, this might awaken them from what they wanted to do n they might feel better..
April 4th, 2016 12:57am
Breathe! Make sure you stay calm, have someone with you, and BREATHE! In and out... In and out... just breathe : )
September 13th, 2016 1:33am
You could write a journal/diary, or take a walk/run, talk to friends and family. Talk to a councilor. Listen to music, play a videogame,
November 21st, 2016 2:27pm
This is a toughie. I first started hurting myself at the age of 9. I am 28 and last hurt myself a month ago. It is a LIFE LONG process. I can tell you now, while I'm in a good place, that coping with thoughts of believing you deserve suffering and pain are just plain old false. The one's who deserve suffering and pain are the people who hurt you and caused the suffering and pain. We are not the victims. We are the survivors. And we should be treated as such. Treat yourself like you deserve this life, because you do.
December 12th, 2017 8:10am
First of all, you must forgive yourself. Second, we are all human, we have different failures in life. We must learn to get up in every downhill of our life.