Lately, I've been hating myself a lot....I feel like a failure, so I physically punish myself for it. I feel good for a while, then it comes back. Any tips to get better?
2 Answers
Last Updated: 06/07/2021 at 11:31pm
Moderated by
Alex DS Ellis, MA, LMFT
Marriage & Family Therapist
Feeling depressed or anxious can be so overwhelming. I want to help you feel better and be able to enjoy life. You are not alone and you deserve emotional support.
Top Rated Answers
Self-harm is something that a lot of people struggle with, but you can get better and it sounds like you're on the right path because you are actively seeking alternatives. When you feel the desire to physically punish yourself try to take a moment and think of something that you might be able to do that would make you feel like you've accomplished something, ex., clean the sink in your bathroom, or go for a walk. Both of those things accomplish a task and one results in a clean sink in your bathroom and the other results in you having the opportunity to have exercised. It will take time to make the shift from self-harm to focusing that energy on other tasks so just know that you are actively making changes for the better.
In my own experiences with self-harm, even though it feels good for a while, I would end up feeling worse afterward. One thing that worked for me was running. I still felt like I was "punishing" my body while I was running (my legs and lungs seemed to be screaming at me!), but afterward, instead of feeling worse, I felt so much better in the long term! I was able to slowly build up my endurance and was able to increase how far I was able to run over time, which felt like a big success. Being able to see that in just one aspect of life can build overall confidence, which speads to all aspects of life.
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