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Why am I still struggling with self-harm as an adult, isn't it just a problem teenagers have?

26 Answers
Last Updated: 01/06/2020 at 5:35pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
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Tara Davis, Doctorate in Counselling Psychology


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Top Rated Answers
November 4th, 2015 8:14am
do not feel alone. millions self harm and a huge number of adults makes up that number. the reason it seems like mostly teenagers do it is that they have eyes on them at all times, school, friends houses, parents, sports teams, dances whatever. its easier for them to be "caught" because they are under a microscope, where as adults have way more privacy. i self harm and i am 25 years old. please do not feel alone.
January 13th, 2015 2:49pm
Absolutely not. Self-harm is much like other addictive habits. The release during the act can create a craving especially when that has been the most effective form of release for you in time where it seem the worst. My sister and I still fight our urges to this day.
September 28th, 2015 12:18am
Self harm is a survival technique - a coping mechanism we turn too when the emotions and issues get too much. It has no time limit and does not magically become redundant when we hit adulthood. Finding healthier coping mechanisms to replace what self harm gives you takes time and practice but is possible.
October 5th, 2016 1:20am
Self-harm occurs in all walks of life. Don't beat yourself up, I'm sure there are other adults some where on this planet that have the same problem, you aren't alone in this. Self-harm is an addiction, it can carry on forever and take you with it until you want to make a change and stop. Please remember we're all here for you and that it's going to get better. I love you and care about you :-]
April 10th, 2015 6:40pm
To judge age over intellectuality isn't a good thing. Self harm can become an addiction to any race, culture, age, gender, etc. To still struggle can be from many things; not enough support, nobody there, nobody understanding you right, not having what YOU NEED, etc. In general with most situations though, there has to be rain before a rainbow.
February 7th, 2017 7:28am
Self-harm is a problem all ages deal with. Self-harm is like remaining sober as an alcoholic. Alcoholics struggle with their alcohol while people struggle to remain sober from self-harming.
March 13th, 2016 11:16pm
Self harm comes from having a build up of emotions that someone doesn't feel they can get out any other way. Some people also self harm to feel like they are still alive and can feel something other than emotional pain. Although more common, none of these things apply only to teenagers, Anyone dealing with a mental illness, difficult emotions, trauma, abuse, depression, really almost anyone can have a struggle with self harm. It isn't seen in adults as much mostly because emotions are their strongest and change quicker as a teen, therefore any adult who self harms likely did it when they were younger too. A good amount of teenagers eventually find other ways of coping after dealing with it so long. And eventually they realize that it's not worth all of the mess and scars (especially when looking for a job). The adults that do self harm tend to do it in less obvious ways or in easy to hide places, I'm sure a lot more adults self harm but most aren't willing to talk about it. Adults begin to self harm in ways other than the common ways such as cutting, burning, or hitting. They begin to go towards things such as tobacco, drugs, and alcohol. It is a temporary fix that they find themselves returning to over and over again because it takes away the pain if even for just a while. This is the same kind of addiction you usually find in teens who self harm. So in reality it's the same idea, if not even more harmful.
November 11th, 2015 2:29am
Absolutely not. Self harm is an addiction, a mental disorder and like mental disorders, it doesn't discriminate on it's victims based on their age, gender, or sexuality
November 2nd, 2015 9:07pm
it is sadly pretty common in all ages, it isnt a problem only teenagers have and you shouldnt feel like its immature
April 1st, 2015 10:52pm
Absolutely not. Self- harm is a struggle that does not simply go away because the memory of it as a possitive can sometimes outrun the negatives it resulted it. It does not dissapear but keep working to make it less and less of an impact on you and you will be where you want to be in no time!
December 14th, 2015 2:20pm
Teenagers arent the only ones who struggle with self harm. As adults we face the same triggers we face as teenagers and it's not a problem you can simply "grow out of" .
February 5th, 2018 4:52pm
Self-harm has got nothing to do with age and you shouldn't be ashamed of doing it,it is not your fault.Try to find some positive alternatives to this issue.I hope you feel better really soon.Take care of yourself!
June 11th, 2015 9:36pm
Self-harm isn't only something teenagers struggle with, life can be hard for everybody, and we all fight with it in our own ways.
January 5th, 2016 4:30am
Self-harm can effect people of all ages. it can happen to anyone. dont worry about it and seek help if it is bothering you
January 25th, 2016 6:52pm
No, that is a myth, anyone could struggle with self harm issues, most of these issues come because of low self esteem, Im sorry you're struggling
May 24th, 2016 11:12am
Self-harm stems from a sense of self loathing. You can hate yourself and wish to punish yourself at any age. That's why self-harm is not unique to teenagers. Remember to seek out help. You deserve happiness.
May 22nd, 2017 11:45pm
It's definitely not a problem that's limited by age. In fact, self-harm can be easier to continue as an adult because you're not under as much scrutiny as you were in school and university so it's harder to find those behaviors.
May 31st, 2015 3:23am
Self-harm is what people varying in ages may go through. It is not simply just a phase or a hobby for teenagers, it is a way to relieve pain. That being said, cutting is like crying when you're sad, only it has more effect. You don't just cry when you're a teenager, do you?
September 16th, 2015 12:20am
Self harm can happen to anyone at any age, but it is more common in teenagers. Self harm is a form of addiction, the more you do it, the more it feels like you need it. The hardest part of quitting in my opinion is getting rid of the fear that consumes you day in and day out. Everybody is different and for me self harm was a way to feel something, anything that didn't involve what was going on in my mind. It was kind of like a distraction that made me feel good about hurting the kind of person I thought I was. I had a lot of stumbles trying not to harm myself again but it was worth every fall because mistakes are how you learn. If I didn't make those mistakes I wouldn't be where I am today and I am finally proud of who I am. Self harm is a cry for help, you know something is off balance in your life and you need to discover what it is and face it head on. Hope this helps, keep smiling :)
December 8th, 2015 4:54am
It isn't a problem just for teenagers. It's a disorder that can happen at any age. Reach out to a private counselor, they'll be able to get you on a healthy path to healing.
March 8th, 2016 11:26pm
No. It's not a problem teenagers have. Anyone at any age could be doing self-harm and being depressed
October 18th, 2016 6:09pm
I see you are struggling with self harm currently, anyone dealing with this can be any age , try taking a bath , read , draw , Listen to music or play an instrument
May 7th, 2018 8:06am
It is not. It is a mental illness that can apply to anyone. Please seek help if you are struggling with self-harm. best of luck.
July 16th, 2018 7:09am
Habits are hard to break, especially ones that we have used to cope in the past. The world is a cruel place, and sometimes someone can not get the help they truly need, which is why apps like this are a great way to help people reach out.
August 14th, 2018 10:30am
No self harm effects everyone. Self harm can be viewed as something that can relief emotionally damage.You are correct however that it does start with teenagers and when you don’t get professional help it keeps on going for many years. Even when you are an adult.
January 6th, 2020 5:35pm
It is not just a problem for teenagers, but for people of all ages, races, and genders. Many of times, this can be caused because you are struggling with letting your emotions out in a healthy manner. It is also caused many times by feelings of worthlessness or derisiveness, which is wrong. Nobody deserves to suffer like that, not you, not anyone. This problem can happen to anyone. One or the best things you can do is put other “coping skills” in front of that, and if none of those work, then try to draw on yourself instead! Research shows drawing on yourself actually helps most people who self harm get through it, and most importantly, it is a healthy way to deal with life on life’s terms!