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Why I can't stop self harming?

18 Answers
Last Updated: 07/10/2018 at 2:15pm
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Monique Thompson, LPC, LPC-S

Licensed Professional Counselor

I am in my 21st year as a psychotherapist. I have worked with over 3, 000 people over the course of my career.

Top Rated Answers
April 10th, 2015 10:29pm
Self harm is addictive, just like smoking. It releases adrenaline, a chemical in your blood which helps to make you feel good. And that chemical is addictive. However, it is possible. So fear not! With the help of a professional it is possible to stop self harming and replace it with a healthier habit which will still allow you to have the feeling of release.
April 17th, 2015 9:22am
Knowing what kinds of situations are particularly risky for you can help you plan to reduce the risks. For example, it is harder to manage your feelings effectively when you are under the influence of drugs or alcohol. Go easy on these if you are aware that you are feeling less stable. Direct the harming urge at something else Some people find squeezing an ice cube provides an alternative that is helpful. Hit pillows or cushions. Flick an elastic band on your wrist. Take a cold bath or shower.
May 31st, 2015 3:41pm
Self harm is an addiction - once you start it becomes very habitual which is dangerous; but it doesn't mean you can't stop. with the right support and methods you will be able to rid yourself of it :)
August 3rd, 2015 9:58pm
in my expierience self harm breaks into our lives as a collateral effect of having a big load of negative feelings towards ourselves that we dont know how to get out. you may feel sad, angry at yourself, or may be blaming yourself for your current situation or for someone close's. identifying which situations or feelings trigger your need to self harm is the first step towards stopping. self harm is a way of punishment, of reflecting what you are feeling on the inside, outside; so if you find yourself in a situation where you self harm and feel you cannot stop from doing it, is due to something you feel that you are not treating or facing.
April 4th, 2016 11:28am
You always CAN stop well in theory you have to want to stop which means breaking down the root cause that make you want to harm yourself in the first place.
May 2nd, 2017 7:04pm
You can stop self-harming, it's probably just difficult right now, and that's okay. Don't beat yourself up over not being able to stop easily, self-harming often becomes like an addiction. It can be very hard to beat and to find things that help your emotions as much as self-harming does, but it can be done. Just give yourself time, take it slow, and don't give up!
February 22nd, 2015 6:37pm
Self-harm is a negative coping skill used to regulate emotions. Become aware of the reasons for your self-harming behaviors and you'll move a step closer to reducing said behaviors.
February 22nd, 2015 10:08pm
Why I can't stop self harming? Like my therapist said on the first visit I ever made to her, It makes the pain real. It's a visual representation of what you're feeling. I know, it sounds like it makes no sense. But if you know, in a way it does make some sense.
April 23rd, 2015 3:14pm
this is because of the continuous stress and a habit made and also due to a learned behaviour and mostly in sensitive people
June 4th, 2015 1:31am
Self harm is hard to overcome. People do this for many reasons and without the proper help it will never be stopped. Even with the proper help it's complicated to stop. So for anyone out there struggling to stop promise this.. Keep the blade and cuts clean and PLEASE BE CAREFUL!! I love you and so do others in this site.
May 24th, 2016 12:16pm
Self-harming gives you a strategy and so you can deal with problems , but in an unhealthy way, but it´s effective. But there are a lot of other strategies you could try instead of harming yourself :) for example breathing exercises. You can find a lot of ideas in the internet
July 12th, 2016 2:59pm
You can stop doing it when you want. You just have to focus on the good things in life and say that you can do it when you want to.
July 25th, 2016 9:28am
it's our brain pattern how it is developed, we make simple things into complex even though we though know it
August 16th, 2016 7:25am
You can. Don't doubt yourself. You need to seek help. Look on the 7 cups website. Never give up.
September 20th, 2016 11:46pm
Self harming is more common that most people think. It's just that very few are comfortable talking about it. Self harm is an attempt to change the pain from mental to physical. The beginning to reducing and eventually stopping self harm is to first seek professional counselling to remove the pain that is emotionally and psychologically being experienced.
January 2nd, 2018 9:05pm
Self-harming is often an addicting activity that gives a euphoric feeling which is usually why people can’t stop.
June 26th, 2018 1:17pm
It's the thing you do that gives you peace. When you self harm- you do it to yourself so you have full control of it. The outside word hurt you so much and you couldnt do anything so now- when you can control how much pain it does to you, you have peace. When you cut your fragile skin and make yourself bleed, when you see the scars- you know that you did it and you have full control. It isn't good. You are hurting your body to make your soul in peace and Without you realizing, in reality,- it somehow controls you.
July 10th, 2018 2:15pm
Self harm is like a habit.Once you to self harm, it is hard to stop.Try using a rubber band instead.