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Why are so many men so "girlie" then get mad when someone asks on this? Please can you share how I can handle this better?

3 Answers
Last Updated: 10/25/2021 at 10:46am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Danielle Gonzales, PsyD

Psychologist

Hello! My name is Dani, I am a Psychologist and registered Psych Assistant. I have a passion for helping a different types of clients from all diverse backgrounds!

Top Rated Answers
Anonymous - Expert in Women's Issues
January 23rd, 2018 1:21am
There are multiple reasons on why a man might get mad about this. One reason is that they might not like the term "girlie" believing that actions and decisions don't have genders. Another reason might be that when you call a behaviour feminine or "girlie", this can be interpreted as gay/homosexual. They might take that as an insult, or just not like that because they don't identify as gay. Also, another reason might be that it makes them self-conscious about what they do, knowing that people are judging what they do. The best thing to do is to just not make any comments. If you want to move away from whatever they're doing, just ask to switch to another topic.
CourageousHeart1602
September 12th, 2020 8:22pm
There are many factors that could contribute it and that depends on how the individual identifies as. Many cis-het men would generally take offence to be called girlie and take it as an insult or that you're insinuating that they identify as gay. Another factor is that those individuals are part of the LGBT community and you're misgendering them and are not respecting their identity. Always ask an individual of what their preferred pronouns are! It clears up any miscommunication there might be and please use the pronouns that the individual asks you to! I hope this helps! Good luck!
Anonymous
October 25th, 2021 10:46am
I really appreciate you wanting help with this it shows you are open for discussion. Maybe men being 'girly' should not be pointed out in the first place. And everyone should be allowed to simply exist? Right? Are they causing us any potential harm or are they breaking any laws? No most probably. So why should that be pointed ? I don't know the context of what happened I might be getting it wrong. But maybe the person might be mad because the question or the comment was inappropriate or made them uncomfortable. You could handle it better by not questioning them. And if you are curious then ask respectfully. That's on your understanding to decide what's respectful and I hope you can get it right. Why are men girly? It's because they are being true to their authentic self. They are who they are and should be accepted the way they are. Putting things to a box won't work.. Let's not assume men should behave a particular way. We all can be whatever we wish to.