How can I stop freezing up from fear of failure so much that I end up just not doing anything?
Last Updated: 02/01/2021 at 7:05am
Monique Bivins, MA, LPC
Licensed Professional Counselor
I have a real passion for helping my clients to overcome life's obstacles . My work with clients is nonjudgmental, supportive, and interactive.
Top Rated Answers
I have this problem too! It's hard to break that mindset once you are already in it. Sometimes I find it helps to stop everything I'm doing and write down everything that's scaring me, no matter what it is. Basically all the reasons that I think failing will mess up my life. Then I go grab a coffee or do something unrelated for 10 mins. When I come back to the list I go through and ask myself if the reasons are logical. For instance "I can't do anything, I'm terrible at my job" is not logical, because I can do my job most of the time, my boss is normally happy with me, so based on the evidence what I've written isn't true. If you keep forcing yourself to confront the illogical nature of your fears that can help dispel them. Normally (with my fears anyway) the issue is proportion, obviously you don't want to mess up, but usually the consequences of failing get blown out of proportion in our heads. Hope that helps.
You have to let go of the past and ur past experiences to move on to the future. Else it is going to hinder u to do anything for ur future.
The fear of failure is very strong. It likely comes from a past upset, roadblock, loved one or peer who may have expressed doubt or pessimism in our abilities. Whatever goals you possess, reasonable by societal standards or not, can be obtained through perseverance. We all have the ability to become who we want to become, reach our fullest potential, defy all odds. It is because we do not fully believe in ourselves that we remain still. Simply believing that whatever you aspire to do is attainable and in your pursuits you will continually be moving toward that achievement, the universe will be unable to deny you and somehow, your steps will continue to be ordered.
Failure is a part of life, thing is you don't know if you will succeed or not if you never try. Everyone has had some type of fear, just push through it.
Realizing that trying and failing is much better than not trying at all. Remind yourself that your best is all one can do.
In what situations or how often would you say that you find yourself freezing up from fear of failure?
If you adopt the attitude that failure isn't the end, and that making mistakes is a normal part of life, you'll be more open to exploring options that scare you. Laughing at your choices if they don't turn out well, is a good way to free up your life.
The first step is to face the fear. Keep doing the work in which you fail with a note in your mind saying to you -I CAN DO THIS. I CAN DEFEAT THIS FAILURE AND THEN THE FEAR OF BEING A FAILURE. I am sure you will WIN.
What I tend to do when I feel I’m about to freeze up from fear or I know something will happen/is happening I remember how to be mindful, being mindful the the act of living in the here and now, feel your feet on the ground feel the pressure on your toes and on your heels. When you can become mindful your head clears up and you can start to calm down. Along with this is breathing exercises, nice long and deep breaths, in through your nose and out through your mouth. These are tactics that I find myself using a lot through out my week.
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