Skip to main content Skip to bottom nav

Should I date one of my co-workers? I really like them.

23 Answers
Last Updated: 02/24/2020 at 2:38am
1 Tip to Feel Better
United States
Moderated by

Brittany Kelley, MSW, LCSW

Clinical Social Work/Therapist

I am a psychodynamically trained clinical social worker. I find assisting women and families through difficult times an extremely rewarding and collaborative process.

Top Rated Answers
Harry53
December 13th, 2014 4:52pm
Dating a coworker can be tricky and can lead to potential problems down the line. If you are thinking about doing that first find out if your employer has a policy which prohibits co-workers from dating each other. If such a policy exists, and you ignore it, you may wind up losing your job. If no such policy exists then it's important for you to realize that if you develop a relationship outside of the work environment, and your relationship doesn't work out, you will still continue to see each other on a regular basis because you work for the same employer. That may make going to work every day more of a challenge and can be quite upsetting.
Anonymous
April 11th, 2015 10:07am
Only if it makes sense to you on all levels and you are prepared to deal with all of the potential consequences.
Anonymous
December 15th, 2014 5:47pm
I believe that if its serious and you feel that it wont affect your work life then you should go for it, If you feel that it will affect your work life however I don't think it will be suitable to get into a relationship.
Anonymous
December 19th, 2014 9:10pm
Think this through carefully. Some employers prohibit dating colleagues. Think about how work might affect your relationship and vice versa. How will you feel if you break up but still have to work together? What if one of you gets promoted and you have to be his boss, or vice versa? What if you see each other so much that you start getting bored? If you do start dating a colleague, you may want to discuss some of these potential pitfalls and how you would maintain a good working relationship if your romantic relationship doesn't pan out.
Anonymous
December 28th, 2014 5:15am
I am not going to give you a straight yes or no answer. that is your call. but if I was you I would consider the possibilities and consider the pros and cons and decide if pressuring or letting go of the idea is best.
setmefreeletmebe
April 10th, 2015 6:19pm
If you want it, than risk it, than do it. Symphathy and love is something beautiful, so why not! ....
iwanttolive1992
December 13th, 2014 3:41am
if you think it could work, and your boss doesn't have a problem with it, I don't see why you couldn't try to date :)
BubblyBrook
December 13th, 2014 11:01am
Navigating treacherous waters with that one. What is your employer's policy on intraoffice dating? How closely do you work with each other? Would you be able to separate work and your relationship effectively? All these factors should be considered.
Anonymous
December 14th, 2014 3:25am
Its a very difficult thing, I would never discourage dating as long as it allowed in the workplace. However you must keep in mind, if things do not work out, chances are that person will still be around, and these memories can haunt you
Anonymous
January 8th, 2015 9:54pm
Relationships at work can be messy, so be careful. You should both think logically about it together before coming to a conclusion.
mysteriousWillow50
April 8th, 2015 5:22pm
Personally, I advise against mixing the work place and the personal life. Even though you may like someone, what happens if the relationship doesn't end well? You don't want the work place and personal lives mixing up and causing potential issues. It's understandable that you like someone, but at the same time don't want to upset your work-personal life balance.
Anonymous
June 17th, 2015 8:56am
It can be high risk. If the circumstances are that you will cannot avoid seeming them, hearing about them or having to talk to them then If things don't work out, getting over them can be really difficult. If a painful breakup means you don't see the person again then "recovery" is a lot easier. If they are going to be around in your work life then it can be really difficult. I came close to changing job in this situation.
PoliteOcean
August 25th, 2015 8:43pm
Only you and the person you wish to be with can make the choices that are best for you. Make sure you both discuss all avenues of the pros and cons of having a relationship while also working together. Discuss what and pursue what you feel is right for you.
ColtTom
August 28th, 2015 1:00pm
That fully depends on the company policy on fraternization between students. I would advise being knowledgeable of the rules on that. However, if you find out you are allowed, if you like them, it is always good to initiate contact.
ImLittleM
November 16th, 2015 10:33am
Dating co-workers can be hard. If you really like the co-worker, that is great, and you should go for it. Make sure that dating co-workers is allowed in your workplace first, and make sure they dating the co-worker will not interrupt your work ethic.
sweetDay98
December 21st, 2015 9:38pm
Dating a co-worker can be a really tricky situation, if not handled well. Ensure you are aware of the company's policies of office dating, as some organizations do not permit it. Also, it would be a good idea to think of all possible things that could happen if you date someone at work. For example, in the event things don't go as planned, you'll need to bear in mind the awkwardness that'll be attached to that person, since you've dated them. If you have set all things in mind, ultimately, it's your decision if you want to date the person or not. It's best to weigh all the pros and cons before doing so, as your career is involved.
Anonymous
December 13th, 2016 10:51pm
Without knowing the whole situation this is a hard question to answer. I would first check your employers policy in their company handbook. Second, recognize your ability to separate work and pleasure when in the workplace. It will be important to stay professional. And third, keep in mind that if it does not work out you will still have to see that individual while you are at work. There is not a standard answer for this question as every situation is different. But I believe being true to yourself and your values is a great place to start.
Theresalwaystomorrow
February 7th, 2017 4:35am
Really reflect the pros and cons of this. Also did you originally sign agreement not to date a coworker. If so remember the relationship would have to be a secret. But if you are going to date and then break up there will be a lot of awkward tension.
avamadueno22
August 7th, 2017 7:40pm
Depends on where you work and what the rules are there. Some places you aren't allowed to date co-workers. Next, talk to this co-worker about how you two both feel about each other and seeing if you would like to date, provided you are allowed to. Just be careful really. but yeah, if you like them and want something more, go for it! Just be careful and know the things you need to know before doing so.
Anonymous
September 18th, 2017 6:04am
I cannot offer you the correct answer in the form of a definitive yes or no. The decision is simply yours. However, before making such a decision I feel that one should not do so out of haste or baser instincts. Your co-worker may very well be the one for you, and nobody is to argue that choise within yourself. Simply consider the repercussions that purusuing such a relationship may have on you professionally, emotionally, socially, and as well realize how those considerations may affect those around you in the same aspects. Nobody is to tell you what is right in your life, but there are many areas to consider when making such a decision.
Anonymous
April 10th, 2018 12:10am
It depends on what your career is, but in most cases, if you both have strong feelings for each other and don't think that your relationship would impact your work then I don't see why not. However, if a break up happens, be aware that work may suffer as a result.
Anonymous
July 23rd, 2018 10:04am
There is nothing wrong in it but make sure you keep a decent gap between your professional & personal life. Generally if things don't workout the personal & professional stuff gets miffed up leading to the organization loss indirectly. So be organized in your professional & personal life,it's all good.
Anonymous
February 24th, 2020 2:38am
It depends on your workplaces code of conduct, but I would say that if you feel a strong connection to someone you should always pursue it. Life is too short to turn away from love. Have you tried to read up on how to make this work within your workplace? Is the work you’re doing worth more than the risk of dating them? There’s a lot of factors to think about, but you’re the expert on you and whatever you decide I believe you will make the right choice for both of you. Reach out if you have anymore questions