Ways to Help with Dysphoria if You're in the Closet

by @princeken

For trans girls or those who are female presenting:

I am not a trans girl! I am not the most informed on how to pass if you're a trans woman but I'm doing research and I'll be adding to this thread every so often whenever I learn new things. 💖

Subtle Makeup: BURTS BEES CHAPSTICKS! I love Burt's Bees. Burt's Bees sells chapstick that's pigmented (and they're vegan!) so you can use chapstick like a lipstick like any other girl! If anybody asks about it just explain that its your chapstick, they don't have to know its pigmented. Go for lighter colors! They not only make you look youthful, lighter colors are typically seen as more feminine by most! If you want blush or other makeup but would like to purchase it subtly, dollar stores sell makeup. It may not be the most pigmented or fancy, but it'll get the job done! Use blush on the apple of your cheeks, not on your cheekbone like some tutorials suggest. If you use it on the apple of your cheek, it makes your face look rounder and more feminine, and also gives you a very cutesy blush!! Use a light shade, avoid shimmery colors if you can.

Hair: If your hair is long enough, use bobby pins and hair clips to pull it back. This can make you sort of get the feeling of styling your hair. If anybody asks why you're wearing them, tell them its to keep your hair out of your face! If you're growing your hair out, or already have long hair, a cute shoulder length cut can make you feel feminine and look absolutely gorgeous but it also frames your face. Add a step to your hair routine, get a product to put in. (Spray-in conditioner is wonderful for this. It gives you the feeling of styling your 'do.) Buy a seperate conditioner to wash your hair with as well. It will make your hair look silky and soft and also add to the feeling of pampering yourself.

Clothing: Tight t-shirts! You can buy a size smaller (as long as it's comfortable) or just a shirt that's supposed to give you a tighter fit. V-necks are often made to have a tighter fit. Skinny jeans accentuate your figure and your hips and make your legs look amazing! (They can also make your butt look nice but shh.) Try wearing more bright colors. If you can, try wearing sports bras. They hide under clothes pretty well, while still providing a feeling of slight pressure on your chest so you know that it's there. Try asking a close girl friend if you can borrow one (only if they're comfortable with it) or if they could ever possibly buy you one. Briefs are a similar cut to typical girls underwear if you can get ahold of underwear for yourself. 

Subtle tips: Avoid soap marketed towards specifically men or women. Get a neutral scent. A sweeter smelling cologne can give you the feeling of wearing perfume! Keep hair-ties around your wrist. It can give you the feeling of jewelry! If anybody asks you why you carry them, you could tell them it's for your girlfriend, or any girl that ever asks for one. You can also use them for yourself if you ever need one! Paint your nails with a clear top coat. 

For trans guys or those who are male presenting:

Masculine Contouring: If you're a trans guy, the last thing you'd probably think of doing is putting on makeup, but contouring your face to look more masculine, like around your jawline, cheek bones, forehead- can really help you pass and look more masculine! This helps me a lot when I go out in public! Putting some foundation or a nude lipstick color on your lips can help too. 

Binding Without a Binder: I beg of y'all, do not bind with bandages of any kind, or multiple sports bras. These are NOT safe options. They will hurt you over time. The only really safe way to 'bind' without a binder is with a sports bra and a baggy t-shirt and a hoodie if it isn't too hot outside. Binders are also not completely safe, please wash your binder to prevent rashes, and don't wear your binder for more than 8 hours.

Clothing: An oversized hoodie or a bigger t-shirt can help make your chest appear more flat! Pair this with a sports bra and you'll look pretty damn good! Sometimes even just putting on a belt for the day helps me. Darker colors can help too, since brighter colors like turqouise, pinks, and purples are typically seen as more feminine. Maroon, navy, and grey are seen as more 'masculine'. You can also purchase packs of men's underwear for pretty cheap at Walmart. I think a pack of men's underwear costs around $7-$8, but I'm unsure as to what the exact price is. "Men's" socks can help too. Little things can make a big difference! 

Hair: If you can, get a pixie cut. Pixie cuts are short, and can look masculine without people knowing thats what you're going for. If you're young, you may have to ask your folks for permission for this. (I'm not allowed to dye or shave any of the hair on my head, but was permitted to cut it shorter!) Tucking your hair into a beanie can help too! 

Packing (mildly NSFW): I have problems with down-there sometimes, and I know this is a sensitive topic so I'm not going to delve into it too deep but my first 'packer' I made with this DIY- 

http://imaginestronghope.tumblr.com/post/165767680491/diy-ftm-packer-a-while-back-i-found-a-tutorial-but

I also found this tutorial on youtube and I haven't tried it but it seems pretty effecient: 

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=F-A8ZqRkfpU

Sublte tips: 

These are CRAZY subtle but they help me quite a bit! 'Gender-neutral' soaps can help you. Avoid soap that markets itself towards specifically men or women. (You know, the bottles that are like ANGRY BEAR for men and the ones for women that are like Beautiful Peach~) Go for something that doesn't target them both. I use a pantene shampoo for my hair and generic 'ocean' scented body wash that I get at Walgreens. Shaving your face can help too, but I don't recommend doing this without actual shaving cream and someone there with experience to help you.

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