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AlternativeAllan
3,147 M Seeking Light
PathStep 4 Compassion hearts89 Forum posts16 Forum upvotes27 Current upvotes27 Age GroupAdult Last activeJuly, 2020 Member sinceJune 10, 2017
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afraid of people (their attention)
Anxiety Support / by AlternativeAllan
Last post
 September 2nd, 2020
...See more just wanted to share about my phobia and some thoughts i have about it i am afraid of: being at the center of a spotlight (like participating in a group chat or just being in a social setting with multiple people) being looked at (like when you walk in public and there are lots of people around and you know you are very visibile) being noticed (like when you walk into a room and people look at you) there is also a fear of standing out it scares me to be perceived as different, because if you do not "blend" in you are more noticable and more noticable = more attention i have heard of something called systematic desensitization, but i struggle to apply it, because when you fear something so basic as human attention, how can you progressively exposure yourself to it? the only thing that seems to help is anonymity like the anonymity found on the internet or if you are outside at night i think that is because the scariest thing is attention from someone who knows you i want to cure my phobia so i am going to try some things, my current plan is to: go to a foreign city and walking the streets and since nobody knows me their attention will not be so scary next step could be to get to know some people third step could be to exposure myself even more to the same people fourth step - perhaps cured?
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Is there such a thing as "false" intimacy?
Relationship Stress / by AlternativeAllan
Last post
 June 17th, 2017
...See more As in, when two people who dont really know one another, start to relate to each other as if they knew each other. The relationship might feel very superficial. Have you experienced this phenomena? Does anyone know why this happens? I feel like these are the only types of relationships i am able to build / start with other people (mostly). And i have been wondering if it is because i do not really know myself, and therefore i connect best with other people who are also confused about themselves....and this leads to the kind of relationship that i described above.
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