Annja1988 Member Profile

...See more Hey, I’m not sure if I’m overthinking this, so I wanted to share and ask for your perspective. I'm 35, and about a year ago I started developing asthma because of my job – something at work triggered breathing problems. I saw a doctor and was officially diagnosed with asthma, and the doctor confirmed that it was work-related. I couldn’t sleep well anymore and felt physically and mentally exhausted. I started thinking about quitting and finding a new job, but I was very anxious about it. My parents and siblings encouraged me to leave for the sake of my health. My boyfriend at the time (we’d been together for 5 years and still don’t live together – we’ve never shared finances, so that’s not part of this) told me to go to doctors, but didn’t support the idea of quitting. That made me doubt myself – like something was wrong with me for even thinking about changing jobs, like maybe I was just weak and others would’ve managed. I really missed emotional support from him – something like “you’ll be okay,” or “take care of yourself.” Especially because this wasn’t some amazing job – it was minimum wage, nothing special. Eventually, I followed my family’s advice, left the job and found a new one, and now I feel so much better – I don’t need medication anymore, I can breathe normally again, and mentally I’m in a much better place. I didn’t even tell my boyfriend for a while because I was afraid he’d judge the decision. Now that I look back with more distance, the whole situation bothers me. I feel like if we’d been living together at the time, I probably would’ve stayed in that job and kept suffering – because I wouldn’t have had the support to leave. I’m wondering: am I expecting too much? Should my boyfriend have offered more emotional support, or is that just unrealistic of me? We’re still dating, but I’m no longer sure this relationship should continue. I’m autistic (though I mask well), and sometimes I fear I misjudge people or situations – maybe I expected too much, or maybe I just wanted permission from someone else to take care of my life, even though I’m an adult and responsible for myself. What do you think? Is it too much to expect emotional support in a situation like this? Or do I have a point in feeling that something important was missing? Or maybe I’m overthinking it all?

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