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BlueMoon133
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PathStep 3 Compassion hearts23 Forum posts1 Forum upvotes9 Current upvotes9 Age GroupAdult Last activeFebruary, 2025 Member sinceMarch 27, 2018
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Afraid of therapy
Newbie Hub / by BlueMoon133
Last post
 February 1st, 2025
...See more Hi , I don't know how to start this threat just wanted to see if other people can relate . I used to be a sensitive child who grew up with emotionally immature and neglectful parents and other adults . To deal with the trauma , i learned to completely numb my emotions and feelings and just went into survival mode . 3 years back , i decided to go for therapy and the more i talked about my childhood the more anger and resentment i could feel bubbling out , i was still living with my parents and that's why i stopped abruptly . during that time ,I hardly managed to talk to my parents normally because looking at them just reminded me of my childhood and i didn't want to lash out . Now , finally i am far away from them in another country, i still have to call them once a week but it's better than living with them. I am finally at peace and actually happy but the past keep on dragging me . I'll be having the best time of my life but the past will haunt me out of no where. I am thinking of going into therapy but i am afraid i will lose my ability to numb my emotions and deal with things . It's the only thing that has kept me going for so long. I never had any adult figure i could rely on or have support. And now i am very hyper independent and do not get close to anyone even if the other person is amazing.
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